Falling Effortlessly
by Tsee85
Summary: Bella Swan,single mother of two has been dealt a bad hand for most of her adult life.After her mother and stepfather die she's force to move with her dad in Forks, will this be the new beginning she's been hoping for? AH
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**This is the chapter of the first story I've ever written, so please be patient with me. I'm a newbie at this.**

**Chapter 1- Saying goodbye**

**BPOV**

Never in a million years would I even come close to thinking that one day she would be gone. For the first twenty minutes I thought someone was playing some horrible trick on me just to get a few laughs, but my drive to Maricopa Medical center confirmed my fears. She was gone, the woman who's been my best friend, grandmother of my children, and life Preserver; was gone. I spent the next two days in complete denial, I kept sitting in the kitchen at the table looking toward the door, hoping her Phil would walk though and tell me stories about how wonderful Vegas was and how Phil is such a cheap sake, they never came. She was gone.

It was my mom Renee and her husband Phil's three year anniversary and he thought it'll be a good idea to celebrate in Vegas, the place they first met. Renee was so excited to go, they even planned to stay for three days at one of those luxurious hotels there; but they didn't even make it to Vegas.

They got into a horrible accident, which was caused by a drunk driver. Phil died instantly while Renee died at the hospital.

Now here I stand at the cemetery holding my sons Collin and Seth's hand, forlornly watching my mother and stepfather, as their bodies are lowered into the ground , while Reverend Peterson put them to rest. While standing here , I couldn't help but notice all the people who attended today, I knew my mother was relatively social but I never expected the amount of people that came today to pay their respects; amongst the many is my dad Charlie,who's currently bent down in the dirt weeping for his ex wife. Charlie and Renee have been divorced for years, but he never got over her. He remained unmarried, single, and still living in the house they brought together when I was born. In other words, he never moved on. Charlie is the chief of police in a small town named Forks, in Washington; the population is minimum so the crime rate is practically nonexistent, which mean Charlie has nothing to do except morn for his former life.

Reverend Peterson has just completed his sermon, and everyone is walking back to their cars, back to their lives, sadly mine has been irrevocably destroyed.

So I give both my sons hands a squeeze take a deep breath, and longingly look toward their casket.

"Goodbye mom, goodbye Phil" I say and turn around and walk back toward Charlie, Whose now standing up from the dirt his eyes crimson and his face ashen , My god he looks wretched.

"Come on dad let's go" I say as I stroke his back. He nods his head, bends down and places a kiss each of our foreheads as we quietly walk toward his red Chevy

The drive back to the Apartment had me feeling a bit uneasy, since neither of us had anything else to say. I turn my head and look toward the back seat and see that Seth and Collin are asleep, it's was an exhausting day for them also. I couldn't take the silence anymore so I say the first thing that comes to mind.

"Wow, I can't believe you still got this Chevy, Mom would of lost her mind if she seen this old thing". As soon as the words leave my mouth I immediately want to take them back, I should have never brought the subject of mom up so soon.

Then he does something I least expect him to do, he pulls the car over on the side of a dirt road about twenty minutes from home; and turns toward me with an expression that looks frighteningly similar to determination.

"You and the boys are coming home with me, no questions about it". I am stunned, speechless. I have no idea of what to say. He takes my stunned silence as his queue to continue and plead his case." Look Bells, Jacob is gone, Renee is…..gone. I mean who else you got here in Phoenix". If Charlie only knew where Jacob was and why he's there a shot gun and a shovel wouldn't be the only items in the back of the Chevy.

"But Dad I…"Charlie then raises his hand which automatically interrupts my attempt at pleading. "I said no questions about it Bells, now I got a job lined up for you when we get home and I also registered Collin and Seth in the daycare center in town. Everything is set up, all you have to do is go on in and start packing up and we'll be in the air early in the morning". He adamantly tells me.

Charlie's plans render me speechless that I didn't even realize we were parked in front of the apartment complex already.

The apartment complex was built near a freeway, so it's obviously not a quiet neighborhood. It consist of five building which are ten stories each. Many people associate my neighborhood to a slum because usually it inhabits low income residents, but I don't care. We've been living here with Renee and Phil for three months… Well, Ever since I had Jacob arrested that is. I moved in because I couldn't keep up with the rent and the measly cash I've been making at Chelsea's diner was no where near enough. So I moved out of me and Jacob's apartment and moved into Renee and Phil's two bedroom apartment on the fifth floor.

"Mommy I'm hungry" Said Seth, whose lying on his back, in the back of the Chevy.

I've been so lost in my thoughts that I didn't even notice he was awake.

"Ok baby, lets go" I unbuckle me and Seth's seatbelt and he immediately jumps in my arms. Charlie is already outside by the rear left door helping Collin out, whose still asleep.

As soon as we enter the apartment Seth runs straight in the kitchen to the refrigerator, pulls out his lunchables and eats it at the table while I go straight to my bedroom feeling exhausted and lie down. Just as I'm about to drift off I hear the annoying ringing of the house phone.

guess I won't be getting a nap in today.

"Hello" I say, while I'm twirling the cord with my fingers and yawning at the same time.

"You have a collect call from Jacob Black at Arizona state correctional facility, will you accept these charges?" I want to shout Hell No! But accept anyway because I'm a dumb ass.

"Bells?" says Jacob, sounding all breathless and annoying.

"Jacob what the hell do you want, you know your not suppose to call me" I tell him.

"Yeah, I know. I'm calling because I found out about Renee and Phil, god…I'm so sorry Bella" He says, and I have to admit he doesn't sound like he has one ounce of remorse. Then something he said caught my attention.

"How did you find out, who told you" I ask him.

"Um…..I spoke to Lauren yesterday and she told me, I'm so sorry Bell" He says

Fucking Bitch!

"Oh…Lauren how could I forget bout Lauren your future baby momma slash woman you cheated with slash my FUCKING CO WORKER!" I say angrily, at this point I'm pissed.

"Bella I'm so sorry" He says again. You got to be fucking kidding me.

"SORRY, YOU'RE SORRY? I'M THE ONE WHO'S FUCKING SORRY, SORRY I MET YOU, SORRY I FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU, AND SORRY I LET YOU BEAT ME!" I say yelling and sobbing at the same time.

"Bella you know I wasn't in the right state of mind at time, I don't even know why you continue to bring this up" He says, and it's the same damn excuse. State of mind my ass, I done with this jerk.

"FUCK YOU JACOB, I DONE. DON'T EVEN BOTHER TO CALL HERE ANYMORE BECAUSE WERE MOVING TOMORROW, I HOPE YOU ROT IN THERE JERK!" I yell as slam the phone on the receiver, l slump on the bed, bury my face in the pillow and silently began to sob. I then realize he didn't even ask about his sons, I sob loudly until I began to lose consciousness and fell asleep.

**Please review I would love to what you all think so far**


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.

Falling Effortlessly

Chapter 2- loose Ends

BPOV

I woke up hours later to Charlie's excessive banging on the door. I groaned irritably, as I rolled on my stomach and placed the pillow over my head. Knowing how persistent Charlie can be.

"Bells, now I know you're up. Your boss just called. Said she'd be stopping by in about an hour," He shouted, while he continued to pound on my bedroom door.

I yawned and raked my hand through my tangled waves, before I reluctantly dragged myself out of bed and forcefully pulled the door open, startling Charlie.

"Oh! Um-I told her you were leaving tomorrow and uh- She said not to worry, She'd take everything and mail your final check to Forks" He informed.

I nodded my head in gratitude as I sauntered pass him to check on Collin and Seth, whose voices I heard coming from the sitting room. When I entered the room Collin and Seth are lounged on the sofa eating popcorn.

"Before you ask, they already had dinner," Charlie said proudly.

"You made them dinner?" I asked him, open-mouthed.

Charlie wasn't exactly known for his culinary skills.

"No, for your information young lady I ordered pizza," He replied jokily as Seth and Collin began jumping on the sofa shouting in unison PIZZA! PIZZA!

I shook my head and chuckled at their antics as I made my way to the kitchen to clean the mess I'm sure they made, since Charlie is pretty much domestically inept.

I started with the dishes first and worked my way across the counter. When I finally reached the stove I heard Charlie clearing his throat from behind me, trying to get my attention. When I turned toward him I'm staggered by his expression.

_He looks pissed._

As I stood there, I observed his heated expression. His jaw was taut and he had this fiery intense look in his eyes that I never seen before.

Then suddenly it dawned on me.

_He heard me talking to Jacob._

I sighed and slump my shoulders in defeat, looking at him timidly "Dad- Before you flip out please let me explain,"

"Damn it Bells! How could you keep this from me?" He shouted. "I'm a cop. I could have gotten that bastard put behind bars!"

"Dad, He's already behind bars," I murmured. "And can you please stop shouting at me?"

Charlie huffed and took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself. When he was relatively calm he asked the one question that I was apprehensive to answer. "How long Bells?"

I immediately stiffen and shift my eyes, deciding to feign ignorance. "He's um… been there for three months now,"

"No! How long has he been putting his hands on you," he said as he clenched his fist furiously.

I began chewing on my bottom lip and fidgeting with my hands nervously, unsure of how to answer him. Then suddenly the door bell rang. I sighed in relief at the welcomed interruption.

_Thank god._

As I turned to leave the kitchen Charlie suddenly grasped me by shoulders. "This discussion is far from over young lady. I will get my answers." I nodded my head and walked to the door.

When I opened the door I spotted my boss Chelsea alongside my co worker's Angela and Ben. Chelsea immediately pulled me in a bone crushing hug and offered her condolences while Angela and Ben were behind me rubbing my back soothingly. When Chelsea finally released me I invited them inside.

As soon as we entered, Seth and Collin scampered up to Chelsea. She laughed as she bent down and picked them both up with a grunt. "Jeeze Bell, what are you feeding these kids?"

Seth and Collin squirmed and giggled in her arms as I narrowed my eyes at her false statement; my kids weren't heavy.

"Mama feed us Mock-a-runny and cheese!" Seth replied as Chelsea and Angela "Awwed" In unison.

Charlie peeked out the sitting room and waved to my guest. "Seth! Collin! Let's go boys, the games on,"

At the mention of the game, the boys jumped from Chelsea's arms and ran in the sitting room. We headed toward the kitchen laughing and shaking our heads.

"Ah…Boys will be boys." Chelsea said humorously.

I leaned against the kitchen wall across from them and slumped my shoulders, as Renee's death began to sink in.

Chelsea and Angela took one look at me and immediately noticed my expression. They came beside me while Ben, who looked completely out of his element, sat at the table.

"So, how you holding up honey" Chelsea asked, with a look of pure sympathy, that I immediately didn't like.

I sighed and looked at her with sad eyes feeling the moisture began to build. "I feel so… hopeless. I don't -I don't know what to do without her"

As soon as the words left my lips Chelsea and Angela pulled into their arms and hugged me whispering words of love and encouragement, while I silently sobbed on their shoulders.

I sobbed for my mother, I sobbed for Phil, I even sobbed for my children who are too young to understand that their grandma and grandpa was gone and they would never come back.

"It's going to be ok Bella. You're going to be alright" Angela murmured repeatedly, as she soothingly rubbed my back.

I nodded in gratitude for their comfort, wiped my eyes and reluctantly pull away. The room had gone silent and I was feeling extremely vulnerable.

I ran my fingers through my hair and averted my eyes, afraid that if I looked at anyone I'd see

Pity in their eyes and I didn't want to be pitied.

The silence was beginning to be extremely uncomfortable so I said the first thing that came to mind. "Jacob called last night"

No one spoke; they all just looked at me in shock. I never talk about Jacob to anyone except Chelsea, who looked absolutely livid.

I immediately regretted bringing the subject of Jake up. If there was anyone that hated Jake more than me, it was Chelsea. Many nights I've cried to her over the phone whenever Jake came home from his latest drinking binge. Ever since then Chelsea harbored hatred toward Jake.

"Oh, yeah what did that asshole have to say," Chelsea scowled

"Nothing important, just that Lauren told him about Renee and Phil….and that he was sorry" I murmured.

I watched as Chelsea's fist clenched and brow furrowed. I can almost feel the anger radiating from her. I stiffened, preparing myself for the imminent outburst.

"Isabella don't you dare fall for that shit, that bastard doesn't know what sorry is?" She growled.

I grasped her shoulders, stared at her intently and quickly reassured her. "I know Chels, I'm done with him."

She looked at me seriously and nodded, satisfied with my statement and I gave her a small smile in return.

"That Lauran… her time is almost up anyway, after next month she'll be fired" Chelsea said sharply.

"Oh no, don't fire her on account of me. You'll need all the extra help you can get, especially with me leaving" I replied

"Bella, I've a got a bunch of applications of potential employee's on my desk. I've already hired one, and she'll be Lauran's replacement," She smirked while Ben and Angela both nodded.

"…and Bella just so you know, I've been wanting to get rid of that hussy way before the whole situation with Jacob happened,"

I softly smiled at her. Internally happy that she would be fired, but feeling guilty because she was pregnant.

Chelsea ruffled my hair then looked at me. "So you're leaving tomorrow, huh"

I walked across the kitchen and leaned against the counter folding my arms across my chest.

"Yeah tomorrow morning to be exact, Charlie pretty much insists we go," I sighed and shook my head, A little anxious about moving to Fork.

Chelsea approached me and stood beside me again. "Well I think it's a good idea too. A new beginning in a different environment and who knows… you might even find Mr. Right," she said wagging her eyebrows.

I rolled my eyes at her obvious attempt to broach the subject of my love life. Chelsea can be so predictable.

"Yeah…Right. What man in his right mind would show interest in a plain, unwed mother of two with a dull personality…A crazy man that who," I replied humorlessly. "Besides I'm not looking for that."

"Oh Bella, you have such a terrible self image. You're beautiful, don't you know that?" Angela said to me with a frown, while Chelsea shook her head disapprovingly at me.

I bent my head and started fidgeting with my fingers, uncomfortable with compliments. I mean, what did they expect me to say I'm not a 5'6, gorgeous, blond with curves of a super model; I'm 5'3, plain, brown-haired with the figure of a stick. Over time I've come to accept my appearance and accept the fact that only losers like Jake would ever be attracted to someone like me.

Chelsea turned toward Angela and scowled. "That's that damn Jacob's fault; he ruined her self esteem, Angela!"

What Chelsea failed to realize was that Jacob didn't ruin my self esteem. I pretty much always felt this way about myself, even as a child. I always been the awkward girl with two left feet that nobody talked to.

Ben suddenly approached me and patted me on the shoulders "Well I think you're awesome Bella,"

I looked at him in shock by his statement, but mostly shocked he had spoken; Ben had never been much of a talker since I met him and when he would speak it was only to answer a question.

"Uh…Thanks?" I stated but it came out sounding more like a question. I am really not good with compliments.

.

He winked at me and sat back down. Angela smiled adoringly at him as he held out his arms to her; she climbed on his lap and kissed him tenderly on the lips. I turned my head and looked away, uncomfortable and a little bit envious of their affections.

As I stood there I suddenly realized that I forgot my manners "Would anyone like something to drink or eat?"

They shook their heads and declined.

"Actually honey we should be heading back, I left Lauran at the diner and you know how dense she can be," Chelsea said and rolled her eyes.

I scoffed at the mention of Lauren's name and immediately took back the guilt I felt for her earlier, she didn't feel guilty when she slept with Jake while I was pregnant.

Chelsea sighed and I walked them to the door. They stopped briefly to hug Seth and Collin, and waved goodbye to Charlie. When we got to the door I turned and hugged Angela and Ben goodbye and thanked them again for visiting me. I promised them that I'd stay in touch; they both nodded and walked out.

I turned toward Chelsea and felt the annoying tightness in my chest as my eyes began to water.

Out of everyone in this town I'd miss her the most. She's been more than just a boss to me, she was my friend. The only person other than my mom I confided in. Now with Renee gone and me moving away, I really felt alone in this world.

Chelsea took one look at me and her eyes began to water too "Oh, Bella I'm going to miss you so much," she said as she hugged me

"I'll miss you too, how am I going to survive out there alone" I sobbed.

She pulled back and looked at me earnestly. "You will never be alone Bella, you've got Charlie, your sons and Angela and I will be just a phone call away,"

I nodded my head sadly and reluctantly let her go. Before she walked out she turned toward me "Promise you'll call me everyday…I don't care what time," I nodded my head as she winked at me then she turned and left.

Feeling stressed and overwhelmed from the days events I decided to head upstairs to take a shower.

The shower was so calming and soothing. The tepid water and the sweet scent of my strawberry shampoo slowly eased the tension in my muscles.

All too soon I finished in the shower. I dried off, wrapped the towel around me and padded down stairs to check on Collin and Seth. When I got there they were asleep beside Charlie on the pull out sofa so I turned the lights and went to bed.

Once in my room I quickly change into my tattered T-shirt and cotton shorts and curl up in the bed.

I began thinking about tomorrow, how tonight is my last night in this bed, my last night in this apartment and my last night in this state. Tomorrow I'll leave this dry cactus growing climate to move to the moist ever green town of Forks. I couldn't help but wonder how the boys would fare there? They never been to Forks before and the only things they know it is through stories Charlie told them on his occasional visits to Phoenix.

I sat up and set the alarm on the nightstand to 5AM, that way I'll have a chance to pack some things before the flight at 7, which reminds me…

I picked up the phone to call Chelsea on speed dial.

"Hello" said Chelsea

"Um… I forgot to ask you, do you mind coming over here sometime this weekend to box up the remainder of the things here" I asked

"Sure thing honey I'll get Ben and Angela to help me pack and he can ask his buddy Eric Yorkie, you know the one who works for that storage company, to hold your thing for you until you get on your feet," She replied

"Thank you so much Chels, I owe you big time" I said

"It's nothing honey I told you I'm only one phone call away. Now don't worry about a thing, I'll handle it, just leave the key under the mat before you leave" She said

"Ok Chels, I'll call you tomorrow once I get settled in" I said

"Alright honey, goodnight and have a safe flight"

"G'Night" I said sleepily as I stifled a yawn, and hung up the phone.

I curled back up in the bed feeling a little bit better about tomorrow. Chelsea's right about one thing though, this will be a new beginning for us and I intend to take advantage of that fact because I might not get the opportunity to do so again.

With that thought in mind I slowly drifted off to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 3 - Welcome back**

**BPOV**

Forks, Washington is without a doubt the epitome of depressing. From its incessant rain to the predictable overcast, I'd be lucky if I survive a week without offing myself.

_I loathe Forks_.

However, I didn't always harbor hatred toward the town that is to be my new home. Once upon a time I loved Forks.

As a child I remembered spending my summers there with Charlie. We'd spend our days fishing in the crystal clear lake, which reflectedthe omnipresent grey sky beautifully, and we'd spend our nights camping in the mountainous terrain breathing in the fresh air amongst an abundance of vegetation. I loved it out there; the ambiance was peaceful, and it was the total opposite of the ever dry climate of Arizona. But as I grew older and reached my awkward teen years, hanging out with your dad became socially unacceptable, which resulted in me becoming a pariah, thus began my 'I hate Forks' tirade. After that, my summers there became infrequent, until I eventually stopped going.

"Attention Passenger where on our final approach to Sea- TAC airport please fastened your seatbelts and put your seat back into an upright position," The pilot announced, interrupting my musings.

I sighed and shook my head unenthusiastically while Collin and Seth were bouncing up and down in there seats excitedly. I looked at them and half smiled. Despite my negative views on the town I knew that they will love it; and that thought alone was enough to lift my spirits. A little

XXX

When we arrive at Sea TAC it was pouring outside so I dress the boys in ponchos as we made our way out of the crowded terminal.

"You want me to call a cab dad?" I asked once we stopped at the exit

"No, I got my ride right there," Charlie said pointing through the glass door, in the direction of his police cruiser.

"Were driving in that?" I groaned

"Yep, I called the guys at the station last night and told them bring it," He said as we walked outside in the rain toward the cruiser, and got in.

I hated the Police cruiser; it was almost as embarrassing as driving in the Chevy, which reminds me...

"Um…dad what are you going to do about the Chevy in Phoenix." I asked while I buckled the boys and myself in.

"Um… Harry and I will drive down there over the weekend. He'll drive the Chevy back and I'll drive the Cruiser. Don't worry Bells; it'll be back before you start work next week." He said as he adjusted the mirrors and pulled off.

"Dad what are you talking about?" I asked.

"The Chevy, you'll need it to travel to work, or anywhere in town." He said matter-of-factly

I sighed and nodded, knowing he's right on all accounts. In a town like Fork a car is as essential as food, water and air, you won't survive without one. Although I hated the Chevy, it beats riding around in the cruiser with Charlie any day.

"Speaking of work… what kind of job you got lined up for me?" I asked

"Oh yeah, it's a little boutique in Port Angeles called Eclipse, owned by the town's physician Carlisle Cullen's daughter Alice. She's a great kid you'll like her, a little hyper, but she's a doll.

"So let me get this straight, I'm already hired," I asked, shocked

"Yes Bells, Carlisle and I are good friends and I asked him to talk to Alice for me and she said she'll hire you. You start next Monday at 9am," He said

"Wow… thanks dad, I guess I'm pretty lucky being the daughter of the police chief in all…" I smirked

He rolled his eyes and ruffled my hair "Got that right…Now let me tell you about the daycare. Now it's in Forks not too far from the high school and its run by a woman named Rosalie Hale. She's a good woman and great with kids, she said all you got to do is bring their health records and birth certificates sometime this week and they can start Monday morning at 7"

"That's really great dad… Thank you so much" I said as I sniffled and my eyes began to well up.

" There's no need to thank me Bells, I love you and those boys more than anything in this got damn world… and I'll always take care of you'll. He said earnestly

I looked at him with teary eyes and smiled. Even though I wasn't around Charlie a lot in my life, he has always been the best father to me and for that I will forever be grateful.

For the first time since I arrived in forks I began to feel hopeful.

The rest of the drive was filled with a comfortable silence so I leaned my head back, closed my eyes and drifted off.

XXX

I woke to sound of giggling and my hair being tugged, when I opened my eyes the car was parked and Charlie was nowhere in sight.

"Mommy" Seth giggled while tugging my hair

"Seth honey, stop pulling mommy's hair you're going to give mommy a headache" I said and he pouted his lip and let go of my hair.

I unbuckled our seat belts and pulled him in my lap "Where's Grandpa Charlie and Seth?"

"They in the house" He said as he pointed to the small house that was my birth home.

I got out the car with Seth to observe our new home. The small white house ran alongside the woods, with no other neighbors in sight. The paint was faded and chipped, and the windows were stained with mildew and grime. The house looked hideous.

Charlie and Collin came out the front door and approached us. He automatically noticed my scrutiny of his house.

"Alright…Before you say anything, I called the painters and they'll be here next week" He said looking embarrassed

I grimaced and shook head in disbelief at the condition of the house, and walked pass him to enter the house, as they followed.

The inside looked ten times worst than the outside. The foyer had clothing lying haphazardly on the floor and staircase, there was paper cluttered everywhere and the walls were in desperate need of a paint job.

How can anyone live like this?

I looked to my right in shock of the perfection of the sitting room. The carpet was vacuumed, the sofa intact, and the 40' flat screen looked brand new, and it was no secret that that was his most prize possession.

I turned to Charlie and arched an eyebrow in question and he shrugged his shoulders.

"I spend most of my time in there watching the game…Speaking of game, there's a Mariners game on right now," He said and he dashed in the sitting room, with Seth and Collin following, and sat on the sofa.

I smiled and shook my head as I began picking things off the floor.

"You don't have to do that Bells" He said ashamedly, with a frown on his face

"Dad I insist…please" I begged, in desperate need of a distraction.

He nodded and turned on the game as I sauntered to the kitchen.

I gasped loudly at the sight before me. I mean, it looked exactly like it did several years ago; the walls were a bright yellow and the curtain's were in a floral pattern. Charlie said Renee use to always complain about the lack sunlight in Forks, that's why she painted it bright yellow. As I walked though the kitchen something on the refrigerator caught my eye, it was a faded piece of paper that looked really old. When I closely examined the paper I immediately noticed Renee's handwriting. I gasped when I realized what it was, it was her old grocery list and Charlie still had it up there like it was written just yesterday.

That further proved my previous thoughts correct. He never got over her.

I opened the fridge and frowned disapprovingly. There was absolutely no food in there, the only contents were a case of beers, bread and cold cuts. So I sat down at the table pulled a piece of paper from my pocket and began making a list of my own.

I spent the rest of the day cleaning and writing down a list of things that were needed in the household. I made sandwiches for lunch and ordered takeout for dinner. By night, I was completely exhausted and all I wanted to do was sleep, but I knew I still had some unpacking to do so I went upstairs to my old room to begin unpacking. As soon as I opened the door I was overwhelmed with a sense of nostalgia. The walls were covered with posters of all my childhood favorite bands and on my bed was my favorite purple quilt Grandma Marie made me. I was amazed that Charlie kept the room this way for all these years, like I still occupied it.

Once I finished unpacking I gave the boys a bath and got them ready for bed. Charlie decided that the boys should sleep in his room, since he had a king size bed; while he sleeps on the pull out sofa in the sitting room, since he spends all his time there anyway.

"Are you guys sure your alright sleeping in Grandpa Charlie's bed all by yourself," I asked as I tucked them in Charlie's bed.

"Yes mommy" they said as they yawned. I kissed them both on the head and walked out, leaving the door ajar.

I took a quick shower and got ready for bed. I decided to call Chelsea but the conversation was brief due to the fact that she was working and the fact that I couldn't seem to keep my eyes opened. I then set my alarm and snuggled deeply in my quilt and quickly fell asleep.

XXX

The next morning was even more chaotic. We had breakfast at local diner, where I was bombarded by several townies, welcoming me home and gushing over Seth and Collin. Charlie was in his element, as he casually chatted with each one of them with a grin on his face. I was completely mortified at all the attention our table was getting and Seth and Collin looked irritated with the women pinching their cheeks. I was relieved when we left and headed off to the supermarket.

When we arrived at the supermarket I quickly grabbed a cart, placed Seth inside it and began getting the items on my list. I picked up fresh fruits and vegetables and many other nutritional foods. I was just about to go and search for the cereals when another cart abruptly crashes into mine. Seth screamed in surprise at the impact and I banged my knee on the metal bars of the cart, I bent over and started rubbing my knee hissing at the throbbing pain. When I straighten back up I was met with a beautiful middle aged woman with caramel colored hair looking at me with a remorseful expression.

"Oh my dear… I'm so sorry" The woman said with her hand on her mouth

I smiled at her concerned brown eyes; I mean she acts like she just hit me with her car or something. "It alright ma'am, I wasn't looking where I was going"

"Nonsense dear it was entirely my fault, if I haven't been prattling on the phone while pushing the cart I would have seen you…are you terribly hurt?" She asked with her hand on her chest looking at my knee

That's when I noticed she had a phone in her hand and I could faintly hear someone on the line talking.

"No…I'm good" I said staring at her phone as the voice grew louder and frantic

"What about you sweetheart, are you ok?" She said to Seth in a gentle tone completely ignoring the frantic voice on the phone.

I looked at Seth as he nodded at the woman and then stared at her phone, as the voice got louder and grew panicked.

She looked at the phone and rolled her eye "Excuse me dear, I have to take this"

Then she put the phone to her ear and whoever on the line out of their misery

"Oh, for the love of all that holy Carlisle…I'm fine…yes dear…I just got into a little accident with a young lady and her boy at the market…yes dear…their fine.." She said on the phone with who I assume is her husband; while holding her finger up for us to stay put.

I wondered if he's the same Carlisle that's a Physician and friends with Charlie, but before I could further speculate she answers my thoughts.

"…what time shall I be expecting you home from the hospital dear? Alright… I love you to darling, goodbye" She ended the call and smiled at me.

"I 'm sorry dear, my husband tends to be a little melodramatic" She said as she rolled her eyes and placed her phone in her purse.

"Its ok ma'am" I said with a smile

Then she looked at me like I was crazy "Oh please don't call me ma'am dear, it makes me feel like an old woman…I'm Esme"

She held out her hand to me and I shook it "How do you Esme, I'm Bella"

"How do you do Bella…and who is this handsome little man" She said as she looked at Seth kindly

"I'm not a man I'm a boy!" Seth shouted with his hands on his hips

Esme threw her head back and laughed wholeheartedly. She had such a pleasant laugh, it reminded of wind chimes or bells, I couldn't help but smile at the sound of it.

"Oh Bella, he is so adorable. What's your name little boy?" She said emphasizing the word 'boy' looking at Seth expectantly

"Seth" He said shyly with his head down peeking up at her

She smiled at him adoringly and lifted his chin with her finger "You're an exceptionally handsome little boy Seth, and it's so nice to meet you"

Seth grinned at her and shook her hand. I smiled at their pleasant exchange, immediately liking this kind woman.

"Bells, where are you!" Charlie shouts from some where in the supermarket

I looked around for some kind of indication to direct Charlie to me "Dad, I'm in aisle…!"

"Five!" Esme shouts and I smiled at her gratefully

I suddenly saw Charlie and Collin walking down aisle five toward us and Esme points her finger in recognition.

"Your Charlie Swan's daughter?" she asked stunned with her eyes wide

"Yes ma'am…I mean Esme" I said as she squinted her eyes at me

Then all of a sudden she pulls in for a hug. To say I was shocked would be an understatement, I just met this woman ten minutes ago and she's hugging me like I'm her long lost daughter or something, I was confused. As she tightens the embrace I couldn't help but notice how delightful her scent was she smelled like a mixture of ginger and cinnamon, very homelike.

"Hey Esme, how are you doing?" Charlie said from behind her, smirking at our awkward exchange.

She pulled away and turned toward him "I'm quite fine Charlie, I was just chatting with your lovely daughter and handsome grandson…by the way, what your name darling?" She said and she knelt down in front of Collin

"I'm Collin and Seth is my little brother" He said proudly

"I'm Esme, and I bet you're a wonderful big brother" She said as she shook his hand

She straightened back up and turned toward me with a sympathetic expression that immediately made me uncomfortable.

"I'm so sorry about your mother my dear" She said with glassy eyes

"Thank you Esme" I said as I looked intently at her, begging her with my eyes to drop the subject

"So…Esme, what brings you here at this time of day?" Charlie said changing the subject, probably sensing my discomfort

_Thank god _

Esme looked at him and grinned "Well if you must know Chief Swan my darling Edward has a week off from school next week and it my duty to make sure the pantry and refrigerator is fully stocked

"Oh yeah? tell Eddie boy to stop by and say hi when he get home" Charlie said

"I will Charlie…Um Bella dear; Alice will be delighted to know you've arrived. Do you mind if I give her your phone number?" She asked me pulling her cell phone back out.

I nodded my head and told her the number as Seth and Collin began to grow impatient with being in the market.

"Alright my dears, I'll let you get back to shopping and I'll see you around sometime" Esme said

"Nice meeting you Esme" I said

"Likewise, my dear…goodbye boys" She said as she blew them a kiss

They waved as she turned her cart and left the aisle. I turned and looked at Charlie with an arched eyebrow.

"Well, that was weird" I said as I pushed the cart up the aisle

"That's the Cullen's for you…weird is their middle name" He said as he placed Collin on his shoulders

I shook my head and began to wonder what Alice was like and hoped by chance she was a lot like her mother.

I pushed the cart out of the aisle and we resumed shopping.

XXX

Please review I would love to hear what you think


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**To avoid a lot of confusion, this story takes place at the end of March, The week off from school Edward has is spring break, Bella starts work next Monday and Seth is 2**

**And Collin is 3.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 4- Separation Anxiety**

**BPOV **

The next couple of days passed by quickly; On Monday morning Charlie returned to work,

So I spent that day buried in laundry .On Tuesday Charlie faxed the boys important documents to Ms Hale, since I had no means of transportation; and On Wednesday and Thursday the painters came to the house, so the boys and I spent most of the time outdoors.

It was Friday night, Charlie and Harry were driving to Phoenix; I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little anxious. Charlie's been working non-stop this week and the times he wasn't working he was helping me with the boys, to say he was exhausted would be an understatement.

I sighed as I sat on the sofa with Seth and Collin, watching Charlie as he prepared to leave. I really wish he'd wait another day to go, he looked awful; his eyes were all droopy with a light purple shadow around them.

"Dad, maybe you should get some rest before you head out" I said worriedly as I got up and approached him in the Foyer.

"I can't, I promised you that truck would be here before you start work and if I don't leave now it won't" He said firmly.

"But Dad… your dead on you feet, look at yourself" I said, I gesturing with my hands.

He placed his hands on my shoulders and looked intently in my eyes "Bells…I will be fine, I'll have Harry drive for a few hours so I could get some rest, Alright?"

I nodded my head, still feeling uneasy but glad he had Harry to help him drive.

Charlie then turned toward the boys and waved them over. They jumped off the sofa and ran to him, hugging his legs.

"Alright fellas, be good to your mother while I'm gone, ok?" He said and they nodded their heads.

Then all of a sudden I began to get a sense of De'ja vu. This all seemed to familiar to me; Me standing in the doorway, Charlie telling the boys to be good to me, And Charlie driving at night to another state, only he's going to Phoenix ….and they went to Vegas.

What ever emotion was covering my face had alerted Charlie that something was wrong. "Bell's are you ok?" Charlie asked putting his hands on my shoulders.

I wasn't ok; my heart was beating to fast, my skin grew hot and clammy, and my body was trembling uncontrollably. Thoughts were racing through my mind_. I can't lose him, I can't lose him!_

This was too much, my body gave out on me, and I fell to the floor.

"Bells! Bella!" Charlie shouted, but his voice seemed so distant.

_I was going to lose him, I knew I was; just like Renee and Phil. Then I'll be alone, without anyone to love me and my kids. I'll have no one; I'll have no one…_

"No! No! No! I can't lose you!" I shrieked as I thrashed on the floor violently and tears flooded my eyes.

Charlie pulled me up. I faintly heard the boys crying and screaming, I couldn't focus on anything, everything was getting blurry and everything was losing its color. It got darker and darker then finally everything went black.

XXX

My eyes fluttered open as I regained consciousness. The bed I was laying on was unbelievably comfortable, so I immediately know I was not in my own room. I looked around the room, taking in my surroundings. The room was breathtaking; A Plush white carpet covered every inch of the floor, a 60' flat screen was mounted on the wall, White Italian silk drapes covered wall-sized windows and a beautifully designed white vanity set was adjacent to it. Only rich people live in such luxury, I could only imagine whose house I was in.

When I stood up, my shoes were no longer on my feet, I scanned the floor for any trace of them, when I didn't find them I bent over and looked under the bed. Once I found them I straightened back up and screeched in surprise, a small woman was right in front of me.

She was quite small, with pixie short black hair. Her skin was a lovely ivory, and her hazel eyes seemed to glow. She reminded me of a fairy as she bounced up in down in a green wrap dress and gold ballet flats.

"Hello Bella" said the little woman enthusiastically, as she bounced forward and hugged me.

My eyes went wide in surprise as this strange woman embraced me. I mean, where the hell was I? And who the hell was she?

She then released me and smiled "I'm Alice"

"Um…Hi Alice…Where am I?" I asked perplexed.

"You're at my parent's house, your dad brought you here after you passed out, how are you feeling?" She asked looking genuinely concerned.

At the mention of Charlie I panicked. Where was he?…. Something must have happened…. Why am I here? My kids, Where are my kids?

My hands began to tremble and sweat oozed from my brow. I had to get out of there! I bolted toward the door but two small hands stopped me, I tried to shake her off me but she had a tight grip.

"Bella, calm down, everything is okay" Alice said softly as she turned me to face her.

"Where's my family…What happened to them!" I shouted as I desperately tried to twist out of her grasp.

My heart was racing and I sobbed at the thought of something happening to them.

"Charlie's fine, He's in the study with my father; and your sons are in the den with my mother" she said as she embraced me in a hug, and rubbed reassuring circles on my back.

But that didn't relax me at all; thoughts of losing my father and children consumed me. I started to get dizzy and my vision blurred.

"Bella, I need you to listen to me. Can you do that for me?"

I nodded as I panted for air.

"Alright…close your eyes and breath in through you nose slowly and exhale through your mouth" she said gently.

I drew in a shaky breath and slowly let it out.

"Now…continue doing that, but this time you're going name the top 10 name brand of designer clothes" she murmured, while massaging my shoulders.

Was she serious? I didn't know a lot about fashion, but I did what she asked, for the simple fact that the exercise was working. I was calming down, my breathing had slowed and my body had stopped shaking.

"Um…Gucci, Versace, Prada, Nike, Adidas, Reebok, Wrangler, The Gap, and….Oh, Jessica Simpson, that's all I know" I said fully calm and feeling better.

I waited for Alice to say something but she didn't so I opened my eyes and peeked at her.

And she was staring at me, mouth agape.

"What Planet are you from?" She asked, shocked.

I just looked at her clueless, not knowing what she was getting at "What?"

"Come on Bella; Nike, Adidas, and Reebok. What are you a track runner or something?… and don't get me started on Wrangler and The Gap…. And, really? Jessica Simpson. Who the hell wears Jessica Simpson?" She ranted gesturing wildly with her hands.

I just stared her for a second then burst out laughing; tears streamed down my face and my stomach ached. I haven't laughed this hard in years. I looked at Alice as I laughed and she had a frown on her face with her arms crossed.

"That's not funny Bella; it's actually pretty tragic… Boy do I have a lot to teach you at work on Monday" She sighed and shook her head.

I immediately stopped laughing as realization dawned on me "Your Alice Cullen!"

"Of course, who did you think I was?"

"Um…I don't know" I murmured as I bent my head, suddenly embarrassed about freaking out in front of my future boss. Well there goes my first impression.

"Hey… don't worry it, ok," She said sincerely.

When I looked up at her, she was smiling brightly at me. I smiled back, I liked this girl.

"So…If your Alice Cullen that means my father is with Dr. Cullen and my kids are with Esme, correct? I asked.

"Correct… now come on," She smiled, pulling me by the hand out the door.

We entered a long corridor with two other rooms facing us and one beside us. The walls were covered with several oil paintings; each one was vibrant and colorful. They looked like antiques and probably cost a fortune.

"That's my room…my Brother Edward's room… and my Brother Emmett's room" She said, pointing at each door as we walked through the hall.

"Whose room was I in? I asked

"No one's, you were in the guest room" She said as we reached an Elegant, curved staircase with a golden banister.

Before we took the first step I suddenly turned to face her, feeling extremely grateful for her help"Um…Alice, I want to thank you for helping me back there…what you did really helped me, a lot "

She wrapped her arm around my shoulders and smiled "No problem, that's what friends are for, right"

I nodded my head and happily smiled back at the thought of being friends with her. We then walked down the stairs.

When we reached a landing I stopped and I turned toward her in shock. "Just how many floors are in this house?"

She rolled her eyes and smiled "Silly Bella, there's only three and we're on the second…come on"

She pulled me through the second floor corridor, which was identical to the third floor; and we stopped in front of a wooden door.

"This is my dads study" She said, and then she lightly knocked.

When the door opened, a handsome middle aged man with grey streaked blond hair and ice blue eyes emerged. He looked at me and smiled as I openly gaped at him

"Bella! I'm so glad your awake… how are you feeling?" He asked as he looked at me concerned.

But before I could respond, Charlie suddenly emerged from the study looking anxiously at me. He placed his hand on my cheek and looked into my eyes. "You ok kiddo?"

I nodded my head and then he pulled me into a hug "You scared the hell out of me Bell…I didn't know what to do…so I brought you here…Carlisle said that you had a panic attack"

I looked at Carlisle with my arms wrapped around Charlie, and he nodded his head which was all the confirmation I needed.

"Shall we continue this conversation in the study?…there are things I want to discuss with you Bella" Carlisle said as he opened the door wide and gestured for us to enter.

We nodded and stepped through the door

The inside of the study was exquisite, it was Victorian styled with a modern touch. A large mahogany desk with three leather chairs stood in the front of the room, and a sofa was in the center. The floor was richly wooden with an antiqued black and gold embroidered throw rug, and the wall-sized windows were draped in ruby colored velvet curtains; but the thing that stood out the most was the massive library that extended along the walls, there were countless books and I practically drooled at the sight of them. I briefly wondered if he had any Jane Austen in stock

I stood by the desk, mouth agape "Wow….this room is incredible"

Carlisle and Alice moved to stand beside me, while Charlie sat in one of the chairs.

"Well…It was originally a library but Esme converted it into a study for me" Carlisle said

"Esme designed this room?" I asked, shocked

"Yes. Actually Esme designed every room in this house….It's what she does, she's an interior designer." Carlisle said proudly

"Hey… she didn't design my room, I had free rein on that" Alice said and winked at me

"What I've seen so far is beautiful" I said

"Thank you Bella. Let's have a seat shall we" Carlisle said gesturing for me to sit in the chair next to Charlie while he sat in his behind the desk.

I suddenly became nervous and began fidgeting with my hands and bouncing my leg. I don't know what he wants to discuss but I hope it isn't anything that will set off another attack.

"Bella, do you have a history of anxiety disorder?" Carlisle asked

I glanced at Charlie and he was looking at me with worry so I grabbed his hand and gave him a reassuring smile "No…this never happened to me before"

"So…at your home was the first episode?" Carlisle asked, with his finger on his jaw.

I glanced behind me at Alice and she placed her hand on my shoulder and smiled softly at me "Um… no…I uh…had another episode up stairs… and Alice helped me through it"

"Really…What do you think triggered these attacks?" Carlisle asked leaning on the desk looking at me seriously, which made me even more nervous.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, feeling apprehensive about telling them the reason I had the attacks; I didn't want Charlie to worry about me, which I knew he would regardless but still if he knew that I panicked because I was afraid of him getting into a car accident like Renee and Phil, he'd never leave the house. I wasn't fearful of him driving in the day time but it was the night I was worried about.

"I was worried about him, he was so tired…and I was worried." I said, not really wanting to elaborate, hoping that Carlisle would just be satisfied with that

"But Bella-" Carlisle said but I interrupted.

"Please….just drop it…ok?" I asked and he nodded his head, I smiled gratefully at him.

"Well, guess I got to go to Phoenix tomorrow night then?" Charlie suddenly said

"No!… Dad please don't go tomorrow night" I said pleadingly, I closed my eyes and took deep breaths through my nose, and Alice gave my shoulder a squeeze.

When I opened my eyes Charlie and Carlisle were staring at me; Carlisle had the strangest look on his face, like he was studying me or something.

"Bells, you need something to drive around here" Charlie said

"I'd be happy to drive Bella and the boys around until she gets her truck" Alice said

"That's wonderful idea Alice" Carlisle said

I shook my head, not wanting to impose. Alice seemed like a generally busy woman with a social life and I don't think she'd want to put that on hold to drive me and my kids around, even if it's for a few days.

"Alice you don't -" I said and she interrupts

"I'll hear none of that Bella, we work the same hours, hell…it's my shop, I don't see what the problem is" Alice said

"I just really don't want to impose" I said

"Oh Bella, you won't impose, I promise….please" Alice said pleadingly with her hands folded together

"Ok Alice" I said and she began bouncing up and down clapping her hands, Charlie and Carlisle chuckled and I smiled. _Yup I definitely like her. _

"Oh Bella, It'll be so fun. We'll take the boys to Rose-" She said and I interrupt

"Who's Rose?"

"Rosalie Hale, she runs the daycare, and she's my friend of mine" Alice said and I nodded my head, knowing who she's referring to.

"Any-who, we'll have so much fun riding to work together and going shopping…..speaking of shopping your seriously due for some new clothes, No offense Bella but not every one in Forks has to dress like mountain people" She said as she looked at me from head to toe

I looked down at my clothes, not seeing anything wrong; I had on Charlie's red plaid shirt over a white t-shirt, my loose fitting wrangler jeans and my beloved black Chuck Taylor's. I thought this was how people in Fork are dressed, obviously not her family, but everybody else. Right?

"Bella looks great Alice, give her a break" Charlie said defending me. I smile at him and he winks at me.

Alice shook her head.

"Charlie, Charlie, Charlie….Bella is a beautiful young woman, and I know I just met her but she's going to be my best friend…and my future best friend deserves a wardrobe that kills!" Alice ranted as Carlisle and Charlie chuckled under their breath and I looked at her in disbelief.

"Wow….is she always like this" I asked Carlisle and he nodded

Alice looked at me and smirked "I'm one of a kind"

I started laughing and she playfully hit me on the shoulder "Stop laughing at me Bella….but seriously we are going shopping tomorrow ASAP"

"Alright Alice…Whatever, after that speech how could I refuse" I said still laughing

"Good… now lets go get you some dinner and see what your boys are up to" Alice said pulling me out of my seat

"Alright Bells, we'll be right here if you need us" Charlie said and I nodded at them and walked out the door with Alice

XXX

The Cullen kitchen was immaculate; it looked like something straight out of Better homes and Gardens. Alice warmed me up some leftovers and we sat down at the table and talked while I ate. Alice told me about the other Cullen's, Edward and Emmett. Edward was graduating from the University of Washington, and Emmett played football for the Seahawks and was currently in Maui with his flavor of the month.

"…I'm telling you Bella, he's a brooding ass wipe…wait to you meet him, you'll see" Alice said eating peanut butter out of the jar with a spoon.

"Thanks for the warning Alice, I'm not too fond of brooding ass wipes" I said as I got up and washed my dish.

"And Edward is the epitome of ass-wiping-ness" Alice said, and we both started laughing.

"Alice, that's not even a word," I said still laughing

"With Edward, you start running out of words to describe him so you just start making shit up" She said and shrugged her shoulder and I laughed even harder as we made our way out of the kitchen.

We entered the sitting room and the first thing I noticed was an enormous picture of the Cullen family on the wall above the fire place. They all looked lovely but only one stood out more then the rest of them; he had a unique bronze colored hair, chiseled jaw and the most intense emerald eyes, he was simply the most beautiful man I've ever seen; I found myself unable to look away from the picture.

"Alice which one of your brothers is he" I said pointing at the beautiful man in the picture.

"Well that is Sir Ass-wiping-ness himself" She said and I looked at her in shock.

"That's the brooding asshole you were telling me about" I said in disbelief

She nodded her head and I turned back toward the picture to ogle the beautiful man, I mean Edward

"Wow" I whispered to myself, hoping that Alice didn't hear me. When I looked back at her she was staring at me smirking

_Yeah, she heard me_

XXX

When we got home Seth and Collin were fast asleep so Charlie and I laid them in his bed and walked out his room.

"One hell of a night, huh?" Charlie said as we stood in the hallway by my bedroom.

"Yeah it was, I think the Cullen's are great" I said

"Yeah they are, even though that Alice is-" Charlie said but I interrupt

"I like her" I said and Charlie nodded his head

"I figured you would" Charlie said and chuckled to himself.

"Night Dad"

"Night Bells"

When I entered my room I quickly changed into my sweats and T-shirt and plopped down on the bed. I sighed as I thought about the Cullen's and the days events_. They must think I'm a complete fruit cake._ I closed my eyes and images ofemeralds lulled me to sleep


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 5 - The first day **

**BPOV**

The next day Alice called me at 8 am. There was a big sale at the mall in Port Angeles and we had to be the first one's there. I showered, dressed, and went outside to meet her. Ten minutes later she pulled up in a bright yellow Porsche, incessantly beeping her horn. I smiled and couldn't help but think of how much the car suited her bubbly personality. When she exited the car she bounced forward and pulled me into tight hug.

"Oh Bella, I'm so excited!" she said, smiling brightly.

"Really?" I said sarcastically, and she sticks her tongue out at me.

My gaze shifted to her incredible car 911 Cerrera S Cabriolet. It was a beauty. After living with Jake you tend to pick up on a few things, and his knowledge of Vehicles was one of the many things. Jake loved cars so much that it was border line obsessive. Many nights when he'd come home from work, if we weren't arguing, we were talking about cars. It was one of the things we actually enjoyed doing together and one of the things I missed.

"What do you think? It was a Christmas present from my Parents" Alice said as she catches me ogling her car

"She's a beauty….a little ostentatious for my taste though" I said.

"Well I love it!" she said cheerfully and twirls. I shake my head at my very animated new friend and got into the car.

"I'll tell you one thing though. I've never seen a car more suited for anyone" I said. She grinned at me and we drove off.

XXX

We spent the whole entire day shopping. I never in my life experienced anything to that extent; I mean I think this girl is borderline compulsive when it comes to shopping. Once we entered the mall all control I had over my wardrobe was gone. She bolted in and out of every aisle throwing various articles of clothing in my arms and pushing me inside the dressing rooms. Alice has great taste but most of the clothing she chose were simply not my style. I'm more of a casual girl. I prefer loose jeans and a t-shirt any day; but the clothes that Alice picked were form fitting, a bit revealing and way out of my comfort zone. We briefly stopped for lunch then we headed to a Children's department store. When she drove me home it was pretty late and I was exhausted beyond belief.

"Oh Bella, I had so much fun today" She said, hugging me in Charlie's driveway.

"Me too….Although it was a little crazy at times" I said and she rolled her eyes at me.

"Whatever Bella, you'll be thanking me later when I'm beating the guys off you with a stick" Alice said, and I rolled my eyes at her comment.

"Anyway, remember to wear the blue v-neck ruffled blouse with the dark wash skinny jeans on Monday" She said and I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion

"I thought you were coming over tomorrow" I said, disappointedly.

"Yeah I was, but I forgot my asshole of a brother is coming home tomorrow and my mom wants us to have a family day, even though Emmett won't be there" She said rolling her eyes, annoyed at the idea

_Edward_… her brother with the bronze hair and mesmerizing eyes was coming home tomorrow. My heart thumped at just the thought of his eyes. Last night those eyes haunted me in my dreams. Although I would never consider the prospect of pursuing him, he was way out of my league anyway and Alice did say he was an asshole, but that didn't mean I couldn't fantasize about him; about diving into those emerald pools and never resurfacing for air. I would willingly and happily drown in them and…

"Bella?" Alice said, interrupting my fantasy about her god-like brother

"Yeah…uh… that's nice" I said and she gaped at me.

"Nice…did you forget what I told you about him… Bella, I'm going to have sit around and listen to him brood and insult me all week" she said irritably.

"No, I mean it's nice that…you know…you have family days" I said sadly, looking down.

Being an only child with divorced parents and no other relatives around, left me really lonely growing up. I remember I would look at other children whose parents were married and their siblings with envy, thinking how lucky they were and how I wished I was them. I couldn't help but think the same about Alice; although her brother may be an asshole she's still lucky to have him, her mom, dad, and oldest brother. She should be grateful to have a family, something that I never had.

"Oh Bella, I 'm sorry. It's just that being around Edward is so…there isn't even a strong enough word to describe how vexing he is." she said. "Well…I gotta run. I need to mentally prepare myself for the big arrival"

"Good luck" I said as I grabbed my bags. She waved at me as she got in her car and drove off.

XXX

"Mommy I don't wanna go" Seth said with tears in his eyes as we entered the day care center.

I signed as I kneeled down and faced him. I've been nervous about bringing them here all weekend, although Alice reassured me that Rose and the rest of the staff were wonderful and great with kids. I just wasn't all that comfortable with leaving my children with strangers. Collin is generally a people person and will adjust to any change in his life with out my assistance; but Seth is the complete opposite, he clings to me more and gets timid and anxious around new people.

"I know baby…but you have to, plus Collin will be right there with you" I said feeling my own eyes starting to water.

"Yeah Seth... and mommy's coming right back, right mommy?" Collin said looking up at me. I nodded my head.

Alice suddenly entered the building with an annoyed expression on her face and I quickly stood up. "What's wrong?"

"Parking around here sucks…You would think that a town with a population this low would have better parking" she huffed

"Um Alice…being that this is the only daycare center in town, an over crowded parking lot should be expected"

"Yeah, yeah" she said waving her hands as we walked into the administration office.

The office was noisy and filled with several parents and kids. Most of the kids were crying and I was glad to see that Seth was not the only one experiencing separation anxiety. There was an middle aged red headed woman with bright red lipstick at the front desk who smiled warmly at us as we approached her, I couldn't help but notice that she had more lip stick on her teeth then her lips .

"Hello good morning, I'm Isabella Swan and these are my son's Seth and Collin"

Her eyes lit up in recognition. "Oh yes, Isabella. We've been expecting you, my…look how grown up you are and your boys are so handsome"

I squinted my eyes at this unfamiliar woman who seems some what familiar with me, but I still didn't recognize her. She smiled brightly at me as if we were old friends being reunited or something, which confused me.

"Oh, you don't remember me do you?" I shook my head. "I'm Ms Cope, I use to baby sit you when you were little"

In the back of my mind I vaguely remember a woman watching me while Charlie went to work when I was about five or six; she had the same red hair and the same awful lipstick. I remembered she had a lot of cats and that it use to piss me off when I'd come home smelling like cat with fur on my clothes.

"Oh yes, Ms Cope. How are the cats" I said as Alice looked at me oddly

Her eyes lit up as she elatedly told me about each cat. She spoke about them as if they were her children, which I thought was absolutely absurd; I mean who the hell dress and bathes their cats? Apparently Ms Cope does, but not before she rubs oil on their fur, Sick. Just as I was about to politely end this weird conversation a tall, blond statuesque woman approached us. She was strikingly beautiful with deep blue eyes that matched the cashmere dress she wore. A sudden wave of insecurity encompassed me from just being in the same room as her. Alice leaped forward and pulled the woman in a hug.

"Hey Rose, how are ya" Alice said in a sing song voice

Rose flipped her hair and smiled "Better now that I'm back at work, you won't believe the weekend I had" She then turned toward me and held out her hand. "I'm Rosalie Hale, I'm one of the teachers here, and you must be Isabella Swan"

Confusion over took my expression as I shook her hand. If I remembered correctly Charlie and Alice mentioned that she ran this center, so wouldn't that make her apart of the administration staff or something? She looked like she should be strutting her stuff on a catwalk somewhere in Paris not wiping snotty noses and changing smelly diapers. Luckily for her both my boys were potty trained "You're a teacher here?"

She placed her arm over Alice's shoulder, which looked really weird since she's about four feet taller than Alice in those stilettos. "Shocking isn't it, since I practically run this place"

Rosalie kneeled down in front of Seth and Collin, who were looking at her like she was a figment of their imagination "You two must be Seth and Collin"

Collin nodded his head and smiled brightly at her, while Seth turned and buried his face on my thigh. Rosalie looked up at me and I silently mouthed 'shy' to her, then she turned her attention back to the boys. "I'm Ms Hale and I'll be your teacher…Do you like to color?

Collin nodded his head excitedly, while Seth gripped my legs tightly and buried his face deeper in my thigh. She then stood up. "I'd like to show you guys something" she began walking and we followed.

She stopped in front of a class room with her name on the door, and opened it. The room was a child's fantasy come to life, there was an abundance of toy and activities. Other children were also present, engaged in various activities; I watched as Collin ran in the room and immediately began playing blocks with two other children. Seth watched the children with interest but continued to cling to me. "Seth, don't you want to play with the other kids?" I asked

He shook his head defiantly and crossed his arms. I didn't notice Rosalie walk away until she came back, holding a little boy's hand and a big book with various Disney characters in it. Seth's eyes lit up when he saw the book and Rosalie kneeled down in front of him. "Seth, this is Josh and he just loves the movie "Cars" The little boy nodded his head enthusiastically.

"Ooh Cars!" Seth said excitedly bouncing up and down with Josh.

"Seth, why don't you and Josh color some Cars for your Mommies?" Rosalie said as the boys ran in the class room shouting 'Yay' in unison.

Alice smirked and placed her arm around my shoulder "See, nothing to worry about"

I smiled as I watched my kids fit in so perfectly with the other children. I'm glad their not socially awkward like me.

"They'll be fine Ms Swan," Said Rosalie

"Please, call me Bella" I said.

She smiled "Alright Bella, I'll see you at three" I nodded my head and she turned toward Alice "Are we still on this weekend?"

"Abso-freaking- lutly, I'm gonna need a night out. Mr. Ass made an appearance last night."

"You must be talking about Eddie the grouch" She chuckled

The offensive names clued me in to who they were talking about. _Edward._ I wondered if he knew that people thought of him as an ass and a grouch.

"The one and only" Alice said as she linked her arm with mine "Well…we better get going, Leah and Emily are probably pulling each others hair out by now"

"Alright ladies, enjoy your day"She said as I blew the boys a kiss and waved at her.

Once we got outside we jumped into Alice's car, and we were off.

"Alright Bella, let me give you the scoop on the girls at Eclipse" Alice said as she weaved her way thought traffic like a pro. "Jessica, the cashier, has a big mouth and thinks she knows everything about everybody…. but what she doesn't know is that we all know she's secretly screwing Mike Newton, from the sporting goods shop. Leah and Emily hate each other because they've been publicly dating the same guy for two years. He's some creep named Sam who hangs out at the bar with the rest of the creeps. You won't believe how many fights I had to break up with those two"

I stared at her wide eyed "Um…Okay, thanks for the scoop"

I had no idea what she just said, that whole speech took less then a minute. I mean seriously this girl has way too much energy at this time of day; she needs to either lay off the caffeine or invest in some Valium.

"In case I forget to tell you…. You look awesome today" She said taking me by surprise with her compliment.

Today I wore the outfit she put together; the blue v-neck ruffled blouse with the dark wash skinny jeans. I left my hair down in loose waves and threw on some black ballet flat to complete the outfit. When I looked in the mirror I thought I looked…ok, not hot.

"Um…Thanks Alice" I said, uncomfortable with compliments. "Oh…How did it go last night, with your brother?"

"The usual. He hugs Mom, nodded at me and glared at Dad. After that we silently ate dinner then went to bed." She said

"What's the deal with him and you're Dad?" I said. Holding on to my seat as she goes over the town's speeding limit.

"Edward and Dad have a very strained relationship. It's been like that for years" She said. "Edward is generally an unhappy person…we just stay out of his way."

I nodded my head and silently watched as we whoosh passed traffic and the ever green forest. I wondered what caused him to be so unhappy. The Cullen's were the most decent, loving family I've ever encountered surely something must have happen. I felt compelled to find out why this beautiful man, who had everything I wish I had felt so dejected in the presence of his family.

XXX

Eclipse was a small boutique in the middle of Port Angeles. It was like walking into one of Alice's closets; the clothes were chic and Trendy. When we arrived the store was flooded with customers. Surprisingly it didn't overwhelm me; I spent four years working in a diner that got busier than this. Alice spent the whole morning training me, and then we all went to lunch at a local bistro a couple of blocks from Eclipse. My co workers were pretty cool, a little self centered but cool. The day passed by quickly. As soon as I knew it, it was time to pick up the boys. Before we left Alice went into her office while the girls and I waited for her.

"Tell Alice I had to go. Ok?" Leah said. She waved to us and walked out the door.

Emily rolled her eyes and muttered 'bitch' under her breath. Jessica shook her head and turned to me "So have you met the rest of the Cullen's?"

"Yes, I met Mr. and Mrs. Cullen" I said

"Dr. Cullen is soooo hot, but who I meant was Emmett and Edward Cullen" She said.

My heart skipped when she said his name. God, what was wrong with me? I didn't even know this guy and yet, just hearing his name affected so much. This is not normal. "No I haven't met them"

"Oh my god, wait until you see them they are hot. But Edward is soooo dreamy; I have like the biggest crush on him." She said. A strange sense of jealousy encompassed me followed by inadequacy; she seems like the kind of girl he would want to date. She was attractive…and blond.

Alice suddenly emerges from her office. "Oh please don't talk about my brother, bad enough I have to deal with him later"

"Edward came home?" She asked, excitedly. Alice rolled her eyes then looked at me.

"Ok…lets go" Alice said. Completely ignoring Jessica

We quickly locked up, got in the Porsche and drove off. There was a lot of traffic on the roads so we got to the center about fifteen minutes late. Seth and Collin practically tackled me to the ground when they saw me. I told them I was sorry and promised them that I'd never come late again. I was about to ask Alice for shorter hours until she suggested that Esme can pick them up everyday. She called Esme and she said she'd love to. As she drove I noticed she was driving in the opposite direction of Charlie's house.

"Um…Alice. Where are we going?" I asked

"We're going to my house. You guys are having dinner with us." She said

"I don't know Alice" I said. Suddenly nervous about meeting Edward. I mean Alice did say he was an asshole.

"Bella, Please? Dinner last night was terrible, at least with you and the boys there it will be little more pleasant" She said with her lip pouted.

"But what about Charlie?" I asked.

"I'll take care of that" She said as she pulled out her cell and dialed a number.

"Hello…Charlie this is Alice…Yes I'm fine. I'm just calling to tell you Bella and the boys are going to be having dinner with us, is that ok?…Of course…ok Charlie, bye." She said. She put in phone in her purse and looked at me with a satisfied smirk on her face.

"Looks like your having dinner with us tonight" She said. She suddenly turned in to a driveway and the Cullen's massive house suddenly came in to view.

It was beautiful. It reminded me of one of those old southern mansions, but modernized. It was white with large columns connecting from the top of house to the front of the wrap around porch. Seth and Collin 'Oohed' as they observe the house through the rear windows. Alice parked in the driveway next to a silver Volvo, black Mercedes and a white Audi.

We got out the car, I grabbed the boy's hands, and we walked up the driveway toward the house. I had a strange feeling that something was going to happen tonight, as we walked up the porch and entered the house.

XXX

**Edward**

I groaned as I woke up. My fucking head was killing me; and someone was annoyingly breathing in my ear. "Wake up Eddie" A woman said as she dragged her fingers across my bare chest.

I sat up abruptly when I realized the woman was Tanya Denali. She was sitting on my bed wearing only my T-shirt. "Tanya, what the hell are you doing here?" I said angrily. I rubbed my eyes and massaged my temples, wishing like hell this headache would go away.

What the hell was her problem? We dated six months ago and broke up because apparently she's into group sex with random guys. She claimed it was rape but one of the guys was in my Physics class and he recorded the whole encounter; which showed that Tanya was the one who propositioned them. She cried and begged for my forgiveness for months and every time I'd either hang up on her or slam the door in her face. The break up didn't affect me at all, it's not like we were in a serious relationship. Tanya was fun and all but cheating was something I simply didn't tolerate. Which brings me to my question, what the hell was she doing here? Jasper knew better than to let her in, which meant she had let herself in.

"Where the fuck is Jasper?" I said, irritably

She smirked and climbed on top of me, straddling me. "He never came back after the party. We have the whole place to ourselves" She said in what suppose to be a sexy voice.

She grinds her hips on me and I felt myself harden in response. _Shit_.I grabbed her by the waist and tossed her on the bed. She looked at me completely shocked.

"Oh come on baby. Don't you miss me" She pouted, crawling back toward me

I jumped out of bed before she reached me and she gasped when she caught sight of my obvious erection. I groaned at my body's betrayal. I guess some things just can't be helped.

She eyed my erection lustfully. "It seems somebody does miss me." She licked her lips and I quickly threw on my sweats.

"No Tanya, I don't miss you. Now get the hell out!" I said firmly

Her eyes got glassy and she pouted her lip "I said I was sorry Eddie… What more do you want from me!" She shouted

I gaped at her. Is this girl fucking insane? How many times did I have to tell her this shit?

"Tanya…You and I are done…We are never getting back together." I said as if I were talking to a child. She wiped her eyes and got off my bed.

"How the fuck did you get in here?" I asked. She bent down and picked her clothes off the floor. I had a perfect view of her ass and notice that she didn't have any panties on. I groaned as my erection throbbed in anticipation. God! I want to fuck her right now.

"Don't you remember? We left together…after the party." She said. She then began unbuttoning the shirt she had on and I quickly turned my head to give her some privacy. Oh my god! She's killing me.

I can't believe I let jasper talk me into going to that party last night. Frat parties were for mindless drunken idiots and I'm sorry to say that my room mate Jasper fits that category. When we got to the party he assured me that after one drink we would leave. But one drink turned into two and after that three and after that I don't remember anything else. I'm a light weight and I'm not ashamed to say it, that's why I don't often drink; which I explained to Jasper but he was too busy eye fucking some blond with big tits. I don't even remember running into Tanya last night; it's no wonder she got the wrong impression. I was fucking wasted.

"You can turn around now Edward. I'm decent" She said

When I turned back around she was wearing a short leather skirt with a hot pink halter top. Her breast looked absolutely edible and I just wanted to run my hands up her legs and wrap them around me. Shit. I haven't had sex in weeks and Tanya looks…..well she looks so fuckable right now. There's no way in hell I'm ever dating her again but that doesn't mean I can't have one last go round. Right? Aww, fuck it, since I'm going to hell might as well do it thoroughly.

I stalked toward her as a predator does his prey. "You are utterly indecent Tanya" I said as my inner animal took over my body. She goes from looking shocked to lustful in 2.5 seconds. By that time I already had her bent over on my bed with my sweats down and her skirt up. I retrieved a condom from my nightstand, put it on, and entered her swiftly. I forgot how vocal Tanya could get; That shit was annoying. As I thrust in and out of her I briefly considered grabbing a pair of my tube socks and stuffing them in her mouth until I finished the job. When she released she threw her head back and screamed, high pitch and piercing. This chick was psycho. When I released soon after I quickly pulled out, threw the condom in the trash then pulled up my sweats. Tanya pulled her skirt down and rolled over on to her back with a big smile on her face.

"Oh Eddie, that was….amazing" she sighed.

I raked my fingers in my hair, immediately regretting what just happen. Damn my fucking hormones; Now Tanya's got the wrong idea. It was wrong of me to have sex with her in the first place. I might as well let her down, gently

"Look Tanya, I'm sorry I took advantage of you, but what just happened was a one time thing ok? We are still not getting back together" I said. She looked at me in shock and crossed her arm over her chest, making her cleavage stick out more. Now that I handled my little or shall I say big problem, I don't find it that much appealing. Now it looked like an average rack you see everyday. Suddenly my cell phone started ringing. I picked it up from the night stand and sighed when my mother's name appeared on the screen.

"Hello mom" I said

I didn't want to be rude to Tanya after what I just did but she left me no choice so I pointed to the door, silently telling her to leave. She rolled her eyes and silently mouthed what looked like 'I'll be back' and slammed the door when she left.

"Hello my darling. Are you all set to come home?" She said. I flopped in the chair at my desk and raked my fingers through my hair.

"Yeah mom, all set." I said. I pulled out a pack of cigarettes from the draw, took one out and lit it.

"You know, we're all looking forward to your visit" She said.

I rolled my eyes as I took a pull of my cigarette. She knew just as well I did that the only one looking forward to seeing me is her. Carlisle will continue to act like I don't exist and Alice will avoid me like the plague. I only wished that Emmett was home, he's the only person apart from my mother who I can stand to be around.

I took another strong pull of my cigarette, reveling in the calming effects of the nicotine. "Oh Yeah? How does Alice and Carlisle feel about my visit?"

"Their…. ecstatic darling." She said, too quickly. I put the cigarette out and stood up.

"Bullshit!" I shouted, heatedly

"Language, Edward" She scolded

"Mom you know just as well as I that Carlisle and Alice despise me" I said

"Oh Edward that's not true, Please don't tell me you actually believe that." She said

I was pissed. I loved my mother to death but her obliviousness to my relationship with Carlisle and Alice was infuriating. How can she tell me they'll be happy to see me when she knows that Carlisle will deliberately work over time and Alice will lock herself in her room just so they don't have to deal with me. They do it every time; and every time she has a different excuse. Carlisle hated me because mom cheated on him and got pregnant with me. He never did or said anything hurtful to me, but being ignored all your life by the only father you knew hurt just as much. When I was a kid I use to watched him constantly dote and praise Alice and Emmett whenever they got an award or something. That shit made my blood boil, to constantly watch him overlook my accomplishments and my talents as if it were insignificant. As a result I grew up angry and resentful toward everyone, except my mother. She was my rock through it all…. the glue that held me together.

"Um mom…I just remembered I still have some things to do before I leave" I said, desperately wanting to end this conversation.

"Alright daring. I love you" She said

"Love you too mom. See you in a few hours" I said.

When I ended the call I laid on the bed and closed my eyes. I pinched the bridge of my nose, a habit I picked up from Carlisle; which was a sure sign of stress. I always got like this when it was time to go back to Fork, and be forced to endure awkward dinners and tedious hours spent with my so call family. I massaged my temples again. My head was throbbing. I would say I'm never drinking again but something tells me that I'll be drinking more frequently once I arrive in Forks_. _Just as I was starting to relax my room mate Jasper barges in my room.

"Hey Eddie!" Jasper shouted.

"Do not fucking call me that" I growled

"What's the matter man? Party too hard last night" He said amusingly

My eyes snapped opened "Would you please shut the fuck up! My head is killing me"

"My bad man…But wasn't that party awesome" He said

I sat up and turned toward him. He looked liked a fucking idiot. He had on a bunch of these Mardi Gras beads around his neck, a bright yellow shirt with the words 'Party over here' written on it, cargo shorts and flip flops.

"I wouldn't know. I don't remember shit after the fourth drink" I said as I stood up and walked passed him, into our small living room

" I know we were suppose to leave but I met this hot blond, who was incredible. She does this thing where she…" I hold my hands up, interrupting him.

"Please…Spare me the all the gory details" I said.

I sat on our futon leaned back and stared up at the ceiling. I thought about not even going to Forks. But quickly changed my mind; I promised mom that I'd come home this time and she'll be heartbroken if I didn't show. I sighed and pull out another cigarette and lit it. Jasper, who was always attuned with the emotions of people around him immediately picked up on my sullen mood. He sat beside. "What's wrong man? Still stress about going to Fork?"

I took a strong pull of my cigarette "You have no idea"

"What are you going to do?" He asked

"What I always do. Stay the fuck out of their way" I said

"You say that like your not apart of the family" He said

I sat up and put the cigarette out, raked my fingers in my hair and looked at him "That's because I'm not. At least that's how he always made me feel." I suddenly stood up. "Look I'm the one with the different father. Carlisle never accepted me…And he never will."

"Maybe if you don't do what you always do and actually attempt to involve yourself with …" I immediately interrupt him.

"Look, don't you think I tried that? When I was a kid all I ever wanted was to be accepted by him" I said

"All I'm saying, is it can't hurt to try again" He said.

My stress level was rising and I desperately wanted to end this conversation "Look man I hear you, but I really need to get in the shower and get ready to leave soon"

"Alright man. I'm going go smoke some herb and catch me some Z's" He said

I walked to the bathroom while he went in his room. "Just make sure you keep the window opened. I hate that fucking smell." I said as I closed the bathroom door.

XXX

When I arrived in Forks it was late. I figure that if I came late maybe everyone would be in bed or on their way to bed. I thought wrong as watched my mom walk out the door smiling brightly. Alice was beside her with an expression of indifference. I got out of my silver Volvo and walked to the porch to greet them.

Mom immediately pulled me into a tight hug and kissed my cheek "Oh Edward. I missed you so much"

"I missed you too Mom" I said. I looked over her shoulder and nodded my head at Alice. She rolled her eyes and muttered 'Whatever' turned and walked inside.

Mom pulled away and gazed at me "Next time don't stay away too long"

I smiled at her. "I won't mom". She linked her arm with mine and we walked inside the house.

I immediately see Carlisle in the foyer, putting on his lab coat. It's just like him to go to work as soon as I arrive.

"Edward" He said. I glared at him and walk upstairs to my room.

Once I enter my room I head straight to my CD wall. I decided to listen to some calming music to help ease the building stress. I chose Debussy, and placed it in the stereo. I laid on my bed and closed my eyes as the soothing melody of Clair de Lune filled the room. I moved my fingers along with the music and got a sudden urge to play my baby grand, it's been a while since I last played it. I had a keyboard in my dorm, but it wasn't the same as my baby grand, maybe when the house is empty I'll go downstairs and play. My eyes grew heavy and I began to fall asleep until someone suddenly knocked on my door.

"Edward darling, come downstairs. Dinner's ready" Mom said through the door. I sat up and turned the stereo off with the remote.

"It's pretty late, didn't you guys have dinner already?" I said. I stood up and opened the door.

"Your Father took his to work. But Alice and I wanted to wait till you arrived so we can eat together" She said. She grabbed my hand and we walked toward the stairs.

"Somehow I doubt that. You know Mom, Ignorance isn't always bliss" I said as we descended the stairs

"Edward, can you please attempt to be cordial on this visit" she scolded

"I'm sorry mom. But don't you find it ironic that every time I come home Carlisle spends most of his time at the hospital… And Alice, most certainly does not want to eat dinner with me." I said

"Your father is a doctor Edward, you know what that job requires…And your sister would love nothing more than to spend some time with you. Just try to be more pleasant to her" She said as we reached the landing.

"Alright mom. I'll be pleasant" I said and smiled at her

She let go of my hand and patted my cheek "That's my boy" She said and we entered the dining room.

Alice was already seated at the table, sporting that same expression of indifference. I quietly sat in the chair on the opposite side of her and waited for mom to serve the dinner. My stomach growled as the mouth watering aroma of my favorite meal, Lasagna, filled the room. When Mom entered she set a plate in front of me then Alice and she went back into the kitchen to get her own. She returned and we silently ate our meal. When we finished she brought out dessert, which was also a favorite of mine, Lemon Meringue Pie. Mom attempted to engage us in conversation, by asking us random question about school or in Alice's case work. We would answer by either nodding or shaking our heads which earned us both a look of disapproval from her. When we finished dessert we silently helped Mom with the dishes, I thanked her for the meal then went upstairs to my bedroom.

I undressed down to my boxers and curled up in bed. I thought about what Jasper said earlier, How I should do things differently with my them this time, and be more involved. It wouldn't hurt to try and if it doesn't work at least I can say I tried. As my eyes grew heavy I had the strangest feeling that this visit would be some how life altering. I immediately shook it off. My brain was fuddled, It was a long day and I was tired as hell. I closed my eyes and quickly fell asleep.

**A Review would be greatly appreciated**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 6- Introductions**

**Edward**

I woke up the next morning with another splitting headache, but this one wasn't from drinking. It was from stress. Being in this house was so fucking stressful and when stressed, my body tends to react in certain ways. Nausea, headaches and the urge smoke cigarettes are my most common symptoms. I sluggishly rolled out of bed and pulled my lighter and cigarette from out of my pants pocket on the floor. I padded across the room, opened the French doors and step onto the balcony. It was a pretty decent day; even with the clouds concealing the sunlight. I lit my cigarette and inhaled; reveling in the calming effects of the nicotine. Last night I had sort of a breakthrough and decided that I would try and be more involved with my family. My only problem was how the hell was I suppose to do that? For one, Carlisle hated me… and I had no idea of what to do, I mean should I just barge in his study all phony and shit and say 'What's up dad, wanna talk about human anatomy?' No. Maybe I should start with the easiest, Alice. She hated me too but she was the easiest to please. All I had to do was let her take me shopping or some dumb shit like that, and she'd love me.

So, my mission today was Alice.

After I finished smoking I put on some flannel pajama pants and went down stairs.

I entered the kitchen just in time to see my mom in a grey pinstripe skirt suit drinking a cup of coffee. I smiled at the sight of her in her business attire with an elegant bun in her hair. When she noticed me, she walked over to me and smiled.

"Good morning darling. You look like you're in a better mood today" She said, reaching up and ruffling my hair

"If that's what you want to call it. Is Alice off today?" I asked as I walked to the coffee maker and poured me a cup

"No darling. Alice switched her days, so that she could help out Charlie's daughter" She said looking at her watch

"Charlie. Who's Charlie?" I asked as she grabbed her purse off the table

She rolled her eyes "Chief Swan Edward."

Chief Swan had a daughter?… I had no idea, but then again the only thing I knew about the man was that he like to fish and he arrest criminals for a living

"I have to run darling, but I'll be home in time to make dinner. The refrigerator and pantry is fully stocked with all your favorites, enjoy"

She hugged and kissed me on the cheek "I love you darling"

"Love you too" I said. She smiled and headed out the door

"Oh, Mom!" I suddenly said. She turned around and gazed at me.

"Thanks for um…everything" I said, earnestly. She'll never know how bearable she's made my life.

"You're welcome darling. Anything for you," she said. She blew me a kiss and walked out the door.

The rest of the morning was just as peaceful. I made me a delicious breakfast of cereal and milk then I briefly chatted with Jasper, who was currently in Texas visiting his family. I told him I was taking his advice about being more involved with my family and he seemed really happy about that. But when he started preaching shit about family values and bonding, I hung up on him. I didn't want to hear that shit, I told him I was trying and that should be enough. The tranquil aura of the house was so comfortable that I suddenly got the urge to play my baby grand. I left the kitchen and headed to the music room.

Growing up, I often thought of the music room as my only solace. I'd spend hours upon hours there playing pieces from Beethoven to Mozart; just getting lost in the music. It was like my own escape from the harsh realities of the world, where I was an unwanted member of my family. As I entered the room I smiled at the sight of it. The morning light shone though the sheer ruby curtains giving the room a pinkish glow that looked amazing against my White Baby grand, in the center of the room, and the white chaise lounge by the wall. I ran a single finger across the top of my most prized possession and notice there was no dust accumulation. Mom must of been dusting it often; I doubt Carlisle and Alice gave a fuck. I sat down on the bench, lifted the fall board and closed my eyes. My fingers flowed swiftly across the ivory as I played a piece I wrote long ago for my mom. Her loving and compassionate nature had inspired me greatly. She was the one who brought music into my life, the only one who ever gave shit about what I was good at. Once I even attempted to write a piece for Carlisle, but it came out sounding depressing and full of anger. I mean I never composed for anyone except my mom, so by attempting to write him a piece was me basically kissing his ass. I did anything to be accepted by him and always ended up feeling like shit in the end. Through out the afternoon I played various pieces desperately trying to get out of the funk that thinking about Carlisle usually gets me in. After hours of playing suddenly I heard the door open.

"That was lovely" My mother said. I open my eyes to see her standing in the doorway with her apron on over her blouse and skirt, with a soft smile on her face.

I pulled down the fall board and stood up "Thanks"

" Was it something you composed" She said, excitingly

I raked my fingers through my hair "Uh…No. I don't compose anymore"

I didn't want to tell her that her husband's treatment of me sent me into a depression and I didn't give a shit about composing anymore.

She sucked her teeth "Well that's a shame. You've always had a knack for writing music"

I smiled softly at her as she waved me over "Come darling, help me prepare dinner. We're having several guest over today" She said and we walked out the room

"Oh yeah, who? Someone from the designing committee?" I said, amusingly

She always had dinner with those stuffy ass colleagues of hers. I couldn't stand them, and she knew it. One time she brought two assholes named John and George over, and I gave them hell; I even managed to get John to spill red wine all over his pants. It looked like he pissed his self. That shit was fucking hilarious. After that she swore she'd never bring anyone over when I was home.

I chuckled and she narrowed her eyes "Not funny Edward…Actually Chief Swan's daughter and her little boys will be having dinner with us."

This Chief Swan's daughter must be someone who normally hangs around the family. This is the second time mom mention her today. She also mentioned she had children, I bet mom has a field day with them. She loves kids.

Once we entered the kitchen, we worked together fluidly. I prepared the food and she cooked it. I wasn't much of a big help; all I did was chop up a few measly vegetables, the rest of the time I spent watching her. I remember when I was a kid how I use to sit on the counter and watch her cook, after school. I'd tell her about my day while she listened and let me taste the food off a spoon. I was some what of a Momma's boy, and I didn't give a shit. I had no other choice. All the love and attention Carlisle fail to give me, my mother provided. When she put the food in the oven I went upstairs to shower. When I finished, I threw on my green Oxford with some dark wash jeans. I raked my fingers through my hair, trying to tame it but failing miserably. After my failed attempt I headed back down stairs.

When I reached the landing I heard children laughing and what sounded like a woman scolding them. That must be the famous Chief Swan's daughter and her kids. She sounded a lot younger than I thought she'd be; her voice was light and soft, and…sort of lovely. They all were in the living room, so I leaned on the wall and peeked inside. And I was not prepare for what I saw.

Chief Swan's daughter was a Knock-out. I mean there aren't enough words in the dictionary to describe how beautiful she was, and to be honest she was the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. She was fair skinned with long chestnut hair that was curled around a perfectly heart-shaped face; and her eyes…her eyes were a dark chocolate shade that I could get lost in forever. She was wearing this dark blue blouse that looked amazing with her skin and dark jeans. Now I've never been one for poetry, but looking at this woman made me want to write a poem, a song, and a fucking composition. Her beauty inspired me. She was sitting on the sofa with Alice while her sons ran wildly around the sofa.

"Seth and Collin. When I count to three you guys better be sitting" She warned them in a voice so soft she couldn't scare a fly .

"Oh Bella. Leave them be, their just boys" Alice said, who was looking at the kids amusingly

_Bella. _God, even her name was beautiful ._quello che una bella donna_

Great, now I'm speaking fucking Italian

"No Alice, If they break something I can't afford to replace it" Bella said. Looking a little annoyed at Alice's nonchalance

She stood up. I couldn't help but notice how perfect her figure was. She was slender with curves in all the right places. _Wow, this woman was a goddess_. She quickly scooped the two boys up and sat down with them on her lap.

"Edward?"

I jumped as my mother startled me. She stood behind me with a curious expression on her face.

"God mom. You scared the crap out of me" I said. I raked my fingers through my hair, suddenly nervous that she caught me ogling Chief Swan's daughter, I mean… _Bella_

"Why are you standing here darling? Did you meet Bella and her boys? I'm going to be picking them up from daycare everyday." She said, happily

I rake my fingers through my hair again. _Why am I so nervous? _"Uh…that's great mom, and no I didn't meet them" I said as I turned around and ogled Bella again. She threw her head back and laughed.

_God she so fucking beautiful _

I turned around and my mom was looking at me with a knowing smirk on her face. She grabbed my hand "Well come on darling and let me introduce you" She said and she dragged me behind her into the living room.

BPOV

When we entered the house Esme immediately greeted us.

"Bella! It's so lovely to see you again" She said as she hugged me with a big grin on her face. I inhaled her delightful scent of ginger and cinnamon and smiled. I got to get me a bottle of whatever perfume she uses

"It's good to see you too Esme" I said with a smile as she pulled away

She turned toward the boys and kneeled down "How are you fellas?"

They immediately engulfed her in a hug and she kissed them both on the cheek. Ever since

The night of the 'incident' they've been quite taken with Esme. She was kind and nurturing and sort of reminded me of…._Renee_

Alice placed her hand on my shoulder "Bella…are you ok? She said with a concerned expression on her face.

I immediately controlled my emotions and smiled "I'm fine"

"Alright, let's go in the living room until dinner's ready" She said and I nodded my head

I looked around and noticed that Esme and the boys disappeared.

"They went into the kitchen with mom. She's most likely giving them something sweet, be prepared" Alice said

"Oh god, is she trying to spoil my children?" I asked with a smile

Alice smiled "She'll spoil them rotten" She chuckled. I shook my head and we walked to the living room.

My heart fluttered as I looked up at the Cullen's family portrait and ogled Edward's face. _God he's so beautiful._ I'm going to finally meet him today ;and that alone made me a nervous wreak. I Wonder what he'd think of me? He'd probably think I'm a total loser compared to the intelligent, sophisticated women he encounters in school. Alice plopped down beside me, smirking mischievously. Oh no, this can't be good

"Bella. We're friends right?" She said a little to sweetly. I squinted my eyes at her and nodded

"And friends are there for each other right?" I nodded my head again, suddenly nervous about what she wanted.

"And friends help each…"

"Alice" I interrupted, no longer able to take the suspense

"Alright, can you please come out with me and Rose this weekend?" She asked with puppy-dog eyes

"Where are you two going" I ask suddenly interested in where people go for fun in forks.

Her eyes lit up "There's this club in P.A called Twilight, it is so awesome. They make the best drinks, and they have a…" I rapidly shook my head, interrupting her

She frowned "Why not?"

"I'm not too comfortable with the whole club scene and I…um never had a drink in my life" I said

She gaped at me "You're kidding right?"

I looked at her confusingly "About what?"

"About never drinking." She said, wide eyed. I shook my head, then all of a sudden she had that mischievous smirk again.

"Oh… you're definitely coming with us on Friday. My mom will baby sit the boys and you guys will spend the night here. Oh…we'll have so much fun." She squealed

Oh no, Oh no. I definitely am notgoing to a club. Men plus excessive alcohol consumption equals trouble. At least it did in Jake's case.

"No Alice, I don't think this is a good idea" I said

She looked at me pleadingly and folded her hands together "Come on, Bella Please. Every time I go with Rose she always hook up with some guy and forget about me; and I'm left sitting at the bar alone trying to fend off drunken losers"

Now I felt bad. I didn't want her to have to sit at a bar alone surrounded by drunk men.

I sighed "Okay Alice. I'll go" She squealed and pulled me into a tight hug, rocking back and forth

"Oh thank you, thank you, thank you" She said. I chuckled as I hugged her

She released me and smiled "I promise you'll have a good time."

"And you'll be having your first drink with us…I feel so honored" She said with her right hand on her chest.

"Um I don't think so" I said. It's one thing for everyone else to throw all their inhibitions out the window, I don't think I could do the same.

"Well, we'll remedy that Friday night" She smirked

"Alice!" I said

"Bella your 23 years old, acting like your 43. It's time for you to live a little, and with me as your friend you'll live. So god damn it let's live!" She said theatrical with a fist pump in the air

I chuckled " You're nuts"

She looked at me at me with pleading eyes " So does that mean you'll come and live a little"

"Yes" I said smiling at the nutty little pixie

"Yay!" She said clapping her hands " I promise, no I swear you'll have an awesome time"

Suddenly Seth and Collin ran into the living room, wildly. It seems that Esme did in fact give them sugar. They began running around the sofa in circles. I put my hand on my forehead and shook my head embarrassingly. Alice chuckled beside me.

"Look mommy imma airplane" Collin said as he spread his arms wide like an airplane and began imitating the sound

Seth mimicked what Collin was doing "Imma air-pawane too"

Alice clapped her hands "Wow you airplanes are super fast" They giggled as they ran

"Alice don't encourage them" I said and ran my fingers through my hair nervously; I hope to god they don't break anything.

"Well they are fast airplanes, I don't think I can fly that fast" She said. They laughed loudly as they ran

I looked down at her black stilettos "Yeah…you'll probably crash, especially in those 4 inch death traps" I chuckled pointing to her shoes. She gaped at me and lightly slapped my shoulder

"You'll be wearing a pair of these death traps on Friday night" She said with a smirk

I shook my head "Oh no Alice, I'll kill myself if I wear those"

"No you won't, I'll help you practice walking in them this week" She said

"But Alice you…"

"Oh Bella. Please just let me have my Top model moment" She interrupts, with a pout

I chuckled "Alright, but nothing too high"

She placed her hand on her chest "scouts honor"

"You were a girl scout?" I asked

"Hellz no! I wouldn't be caught dead in those outfits" she said. I shook my head and chuckled

As Seth and Collin continued running, Collin suddenly jumped up and almost tipped over a glass vase

"That's enough boys. Come sit down" I scolded

They continued to laugh and run. Seth jumped up and mimicked what Collin did and almost knocked down a expensive looking lamp.

"Seth and Collin! When I count to three you guys better be sitting" I said to them in warning

They ignored me and continued to run wildly. I sighed. I have to make sure Esme doesn't give them anymore sweets otherwise I'll have over 3 thousand dollars worth of items to replace.

"Oh Bella. Leave them be their just boys" Alice said looking at them amusingly

"No Alice, If they break something I can't afford to replace it" I said annoyed by her nonchalance. I stood up just as the boys was about to run pass me and grabbed them.

I sat back down with both of them on my lap. They crossed their arms on their chest disappointingly.

"That's enough for today guys, ok?" I said. They nodded their heads and moved to sit beside me on the sofa.

Alice smiled at them "You know, airplanes do have to land sometime" She said, trying to cheer them up

"What about your plane, Alice?" Collin asked

I looked at Alice and smirked "Unfortunately, Alice's plane crashed. She had these 4 inch death traps connected to it, that weighed a ton"

Collin gaped at her; she rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue at me. I laughed wholeheartedly.

Suddenly Esme entered the room, and there trailing behind her with his hand grasped in hers was _Edward_

"Oh boy, Here comes the ass wipe" Alice whispered in my ear.

My heart rate accelerated; I was sure it would beat out my chest .God; He looked even more beautiful in person…and so tall. His bronze hair was in sexy disarray that I yearn to run my fingers through. His angular face and chiseled jaw line were features I've only seen on Greek gods and the slight stubble on it only made him appear even sexier. His eyes…oh god his eyes did wonderful things to my insides; they were so vibrant and intense. He had on a green Oxford that looked amazing with his eyes and dark wash jeans. As him and Esme approached us I couldn't but notice his physique; he was lean but muscular, he was….perfect.

His eyes were averted and his face was tensed. He almost looked….nervous? What can he possible be nervous about? He's the Greek god and I'm…..well I'm ordinary.

"Bella dear, I'd like you to meet my son Edward?" Esme said enthusiastically, with a big smile on her face

I nervously stood up. Then his eyes shifted and he looked directly at me. I was immediately mesmerized in a sea of green. His gaze was so intense that my pulse raced and I immediately felt the blood rush to my face and I blushed. I haven't blushed in years, Jacob never even had that affect on me. I was so embarrassed and wanted to look away but his eyes held me captive. Then he smile, this crooked smile that nearly took my breath away.

"Hello, I'm Edward Cullen, it's nice to meet you" He said as he held out his hand.

God, Even his voice was sexy. It was deep and velvety, and so damn appealing. Can this man be anymore perfect?

"It's a pleasure Edward" I said in a voice a little too husky. My face got even redder. I was mortified; I really didn't mean to sound like that.

He shifted uncomfortably and….it sound like he groaned. Then I realized I haven't shaken his hand yet. He must think I'm a total fruit cake. I smile softly at him and grabbed his hand. I wasn't prepared for what happened next.

It felt like an electric current hummed through my body. _Wow_. It wasn't painful, it was….pleasant. Really pleasant. Then all too soon I reluctantly released his hand. He stared at me wide-eyed, shocked. Did he feel that too?

It felt like we were in our own little bubble, until Alice cleared her throat immediately popping it. So I averted my eyes from Edward's and turned around toward her. She stared at me then at Edward with the strangest expression, and then she looked at Esme.

" Mom, Is dinner ready?" She asked, with a hint of irritation in her voice

"Yes dear. Dinner ready" Esme said cheerfully, Then she looked at me and winked. _What?_

"Thank god. Let's go "Alice huffed as she bounced off the sofa. Seth and Collin bounced off excitedly, and began jumping around wildly.

"Boys!" I scolded. They immediately stopped and stood beside me.

Edward looked at me and smiled, that crooked smile and my heart thumped. Then he slowly kneeled down in front of me and I held my breath. _Oh my god_. When his head was leveled with my thigh he turned and smiled at Seth and Collin. I gazed at his hair longingly, fighting the urge to run my fingers through it. It looked so soft and beautiful, and some strands were lighter then others.

"Hey guys, my name is Edward. What are your names?" Edward said. _God, his voice dripped sex_. Collin smiled brightly at Edward, while Seth grabbed my leg and looked at Edward timidly.

"My name's Collin. That's Seth" Collin said confidently

Edward shook his hand "Nice to meet you Collin"

He then turned toward Seth, who buried his face in my thigh.

"Hey Seth. I'm not a bad guy…I'm a good guy, you know like Batman" Edward said. That piqued Seth's interest. He turned his head and faced Edward.

"You a super he-woo" Seth asked, wide eyed

Edward chuckled and shook his head. His hair swayed as he shook it, and I found myself once again transfixed with it.

"No, I'm not a super hero. I'm just a nice guy" He said. "But if I were one, I'd want to be Batman. He has really cool gadgets"

Seth let go of my leg and smiled brightly at Edward "I wanna be Lightning Ma-Queen" He said excitedly. Edward looked up at me from under his eye lashes and arched an eyebrow. _God, he's sexy._

"C-Cars…. It's his favorite movie" I said with a slight stutter. He gazed at me briefly then quickly turned back to Seth. My pulse quickened. _This man is going to be the death of me._

"I never seen that movie, but I could order it this week. You guys wanna watch it with me?" He asked.

Edward laughed as they yelled 'Yay' in unison and began jumping up and down. Then he slowly stood back up and looked at me.

" Is that alright with you?" He asked, gazing into my eyes.

His eyes were piercing and left me dazzled. I simply nodded my head, unable to formulate words. I'd pretty much agree to anything he'd ask me, when he looks at me like that.

He smiled that sexy, crooked smile then gave the boys a high-five. I smiled at the sweet display of male-bonding then caught Alice staring at me out of the corner of my eye. When I turned and look at her she still had that strange expression on her face. _Weird _

Carlisle suddenly step in the doorway and waved. I watched as Edward's expression went from pleasant and cheerful to one of indifference. Esme must have noticed too because she placed her hand on his shoulder and squeezed it. He gave her a small smile and she ruffled his hair wildly. He lightly batted her hand away. She released his hair and chuckled. I smiled at the sweet exchange. They must be really close.

"Alright, let's eat dinner before it get's cold" Esme said elatedly. We all headed to the dining room.

Once we entered the dining room, we immediately sat down and Esme serve everyone dinner. Although the food was delicious, my attention was elsewhere. I kept stealing glances at Edward. Every time I would looked at him, he would look at me and I would quickly look down, blushing. I kept my head down for the remainder of dinner, until Esme brought out dessert.

"Ooh cake!" Collin said excitedly as Esme brought out a strawberry short cake.

"That looks absolutely delicious honey" said Carlisle. Esme smiled brightly at him and he winked at her.

Esme serve us each a piece of cake then went back to her seat, at the head of the table next to Carlisle. We all began eating the delicious dessert enthusiastically. Seth and Collin verbalized their appreciation by saying 'Mmm' and 'yum' throughout the meal which caused us all to laugh.

Carlisle suddenly cleared his throat "So how are things in school Edward?"

The whole table went silent and I glanced up at Edward, who set his fork down and look at Carlisle incredulously

"Um…things are good. I passed all my classes" He said, suddenly looking like a timid little boy

Carlisle gave him a small smile " Excellent. So I assume your all set to graduate this June"

Edward nodded his head " Yeah"

The table went silent after that. Esme had a smile on her face looking adoringly at Carlisle. Alice looked at her parents and smiled. Something told me that that brief exchange held some sort of significance among the family. I glanced at Edward and he was looking down eating his cake with a small smile on his face; and that confirmed my thoughts.

"So Bella, How are you doing?" Carlisle suddenly asked me. I stiffened. The way he said that sounded like he was implying something. I'm sure what he really wanted to know was if I've had another episode

"I'm fine Carlisle" I said in annoyance with emphasis on the word 'fine'. I locked eyes with Edward, then quickly looked away. His gaze was too intense and he looked curious.

Carlisle nodded his head" You know I spoke with Charlie and he agreed that Friday morning would be the best time for his trip to Phoenix."

I chewed on my bottom lip nervously and pleaded with my body to stay calm. Why is he talking about this right now?

"Oh yeah? He didn't say anything to me" I said, upset that Charlie fail to tell me first.

" He didn't want to…uh risk you having another attack at home" He said.

Every one was staring at me with sympathetic expressions except for Edward, who looked confused. I began to feel really uncomfortable and embarrassed; I mean he could of at least pulled me aside to talk about this. Now Edward would definitely think I was a loser. I abruptly stood up.

"It's getting pretty late, so I think we better head home" I said looking at Alice, begging her with my eyes to agree. She nodded her head and stood up.

I turn to Esme "Thank you for dinner, Esme"

"Your welcome dear" Esme said with that same sympathetic look

" Goodnight everyone. And it was nice meeting you Edward" I said and gave him a small smile.

"Likewise Bella" He said. He smiled at me then turned his head and glared at Carlisle.

Seth and Collin stood up and waved goodbye to everyone, then we walked out the room.

We left the house, hopped in the car and drove off. It was pretty late. Seth and Collin fell asleep in the back seat as Alice silently drove us home. When we reached Charlie's driveway I stretched and gently woke both the boys up. I gave Alice a small smile got out the car and made my way in the house. When I entered the house all the lights were out and the glow from the TV cast a eerie shadow in the house. I walked upstairs and put the boys to bed then went back downstairs to confront Charlie. He was laying on the pull out sofa, engrossed in some show about fishing.

"Why didn't you tell me you were going to Phoenix on Friday?" I asked accusingly

He sat up on the edge of the sofa bed " I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to worry. Remember what happened last time?" He said looking at me anxiously. As if I was on the verge of an attack.

I rolled my eye " Yeah I remember. That's exactly why you should have told me first. God, those people must think I'm completely crazy." I sighed and sat next to him

" No they don't Bell. Their actually quite fond of you. Carlisle says they never shut up about you and the boys"

I smiled up at him "Really?"

He nodded his head " They just want to help you, Bell. And so do I "

I leaned my head on his shoulder and he wrap his arm around my shoulder. Enclosing me in his warmth. I signed in content. If only Charlie knew how much he and the Cullen are really helping me. After Renee and Phil died I was prepared to live a life filled with sorrow and unhappiness. Since moving to Forks I found myself optimistic and looking forward to the next day. _New beginning_. I truly felt like this was a new beginning, and I felt so blessed to have such amazing people in my life. My only fear is that somewhere along the way they'll see the weak, insignificant woman I am and turn their backs on me. I tucked my hair behind my ear and looked up at Charlie

" You do dad, you do" I murmured. He pulled me closer to him and kiss the top of my head affectionately. I closed my eyes and reveled in the comfort my father's embrace brought me. Wishing that I'd feel like for the rest of my life; safe and protected.

**Be kind and review **


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 7- Emotional Acquaintance**

**EPOV**

As soon as Bella and her sons left I stormed upstairs to my room. I put on some hard rock music and flopped on the bed._ I was livid_. I mean what the fuck was his problem she obviously was uncomfortable with talking about whatever the fuck he was insinuating. I saw it in her eyes and in her posture. She fucking tensed up. She was nervous; and when she abruptly left, I could see she was embarrassed. That was after my incompetent 'father' mentioned something about another attack and made her uncomfortable. I mean he's a fucking doctor; his job is suppose to be about making people comfortable and shit, yet he managed to chase Bella away. But I would be lying if I said that I wasn't curious about what happened to her. I wanted to know who or what attacked this beautiful woman so I could stop that shit from ever happening again. I don't know what it is about her but I felt inexplicably protective her. I would give anything; do anything to always see that beautiful smile she gave me tonight. This is why I felt like kicking Carlisle's ass right now. When mom introduced us I was so freaking nervous, but as soon as I gazed into those dark chocolate pools any nervousness I felt went right out the window. She had the most expressive eyes; when I gazed in them I was immediately captivated. Then her soft ample cheeks tinged a lovely shade of pink; I watched the color descended down to her elegant swan-like neck and when she said 'it's a pleasure Edward'; I nearly came in my went smoothly, I kept stealing glances at Bella at the table and Carlisle even managed to shock the shit out of me by initiating a conversation with me. I knew that mom had something to do with it, but the fact that he did it was shocking and sort of nice. Then he had to go and fuck up the moment by making Bella uncomfortable.

I sighed and raked my fingers through my hair. I couldn't get her out of my head. This woman has managed to dominate all thoughts in my brain after only knowing her a few hours. Yes I was attracted to her, but it was something more. She was different. I felt drawn to her. I wanted to know her; and only one person could help me with that.

_Alice_.

I must have dozed off because I nearly jumped out of bed when someone started banging on my door. I groaned as I stood up and walked to the door, pulling it open forcefully. Alice stood there with her arms crossed and an angry scowl on her face.

"What the fuck Alice" I said irritably. She pushed past me and stood in the center of my room, facing me.

"Don't what the fuck me Edward. You better stay away from her" she said pointing her finger at me.

"Alice…What the hell are you talking about?" I asked, perplexed.

She walked up to me "I'm talking about Bella. Stay away from her"

_What?_

"Alice, I just met the woman. What the fuck are you getting at" I said as I frustratingly raked my fingers through my hair.

"What I'm getting at is, she's kind and sweet; and she's been though a lot. She doesn't need your insufferable brooding ass pursuing her" She said brashly, staring daggers at me

I opened my mouth and closed it several times unable to respond to the insult. She was right; my unmerited behavior toward her has formed a constant wedge in our relationship. I took all my frustrations out on her; but that still didn't give her the right to pass judgment on me.

"Alice-"

"I'm not stupid Edward. I seen the way you were looking at her…. and she was no better" She said, and murmured the last part.

Was she really looking at me the way I was looking at her? I couldn't help the grin that formed on my face at the thought of Bella being attracted to me.

Alice pointed her finger at me "You see. That's what I mean. I'm not playing Edward, leave her alone. Okay?…I like her"

I sat on the edge of my bed and sighed in defeat "Okay, if that's what you really want… I wouldn't want you to hate me anymore than you do now"

She sat down beside me and turned toward me "Edward, I don't hate you. You irritate the shit out of me, but I could never hate my brother" she grabbed my hand "I only wish that we had a better relationship"

As I stared at her intently, I could see the sincerity in her eyes. I began to feel guilty about how I treated her all this time. I knew she was generally a great person and sister. It's just that I was so consumed with envy of her and Emmett that I irrationally lashed out on them, especially her since Emmett wasn't home often.

I squeezed her hand and smiled "Me too half pint"

"Hey!" She said. She smacked me on the back of my head "Ass wipe"

"Ouch" I said as I rubbed the back of my head. Then I suddenly looked at her seriously.

"I'm sorry Alice. What can I do to make it up to you?" I ask, earnestly.

She tapped her chin, contemplating what she wanted from me. I crossed my arms and patiently waited, already knowing what she'd want.

"I've got it. You could let me take you shopping" She said, excitingly.

I rolled my eyes "That's all?"

"Yes…And don't date Bella, but you already promised you wouldn't do that" She said.

"Damn Alice, am I really that much of a jerk?" I asked, staring at her intently.

"Yes; but that's not all, Edward. Bella's really fragile right now. I don't think she's ready to date any one" she replied.

"What happened to her, Alice" I asked, seriously.

"It's not my story to tell. Just know, the only thing she needs right now is a friend. Do you think you could be just that to her?" She asked, arching an eyebrow.

I raked my hand through my hair "Yeah I guess I can; but I would be lying if I said I wasn't unbelievably attracted to her"

"Yeah I know. You were practically drooling at dinner" She smirked.

"Whatever" I said. She rose off the bed and walked to the door.

"So…are we o.k. now?" I asked nervously

She smiled at me, holding the door open "Yes. We're o.k. Edward"

I smiled "Goodnight half pint"

"Goodnight ass wipe" She replied. Then she turned and walked out the door, shutting it behind her.

I laid on my back and closed my eyes. Behind my lids, the image of a mahogany goddess came into view. I thought about her laugh, her smile and her lovely blush. God she's so appealing. I would be a friend to her, if that is what she needed. I would do anything just to see her again. Her sons were great to; they reminded me of Emmett and me growing up. Collin was outgoing and social like Emmett and Seth was more reserved and timid like I was. The similarities were staggering. I looked forward to getting to know Bella and her sons and for the first time since I arrived home I was glad I decided to come here.

XXX

The next morning was tedious. I spent most of my time smoking cigarettes and lounging around the house, waiting for the evening so I could see Bella again. I went online to order the movie Cars for Bella's son and was surprised when someone suddenly IM me.

_TDenali883: Hi baby._

I groaned in annoyance. What the fuck does she want?

_E.C108: Tanya what the fuck do you want?_

_TDenali883: Oh Eddie don't be such a sour puss. I just want to know how you're enjoying Forks so far._

How the hell did she find out I was in Forks? Jasper, I'm going to kill that prick.

_E.C108: That's none of your business Tanya._

_TDenali883: Well if you ask me this town can really use some modernization. Everything is dull and boring. Thank god for Port Angeles, Right?_

What the fuck.

_E.C108: You're in Forks?_

_TDenali883: Yeah, once I found out you were coming here I thought I'd give my cousin Rosalie a visit. Isn't that great!_

_E.C108: What are you my fucking stalker? And wait a minute Rosalie Hale is your cousin? Small fucking world._

_TDenali883: I know right_

_E.C108: Whatever Tanya. The chances of you bumping into me are slim to none._

_TDenali883: (pout)_

_E.C108: Bye Tanya. And don't fucking IM me anymore._

I quickly signed off and shut down my laptop. Small fucking world; indeed. Who would have thought Tanya, the bane of my existence and Rosalie, my sister's friend were related. I'll have to ask Alice not to invite anymore guest over while I'm here, I wouldn't want to chance bumping into Tanya here.

I walked to the kitchen and decided to make me a quick lunch then sat in the living room to watch some t.v. Nothing was on but dumb ass reality shows. Usually I'd turn the t.v off whenever one those stupid shows were on but today I decided to sit and watch. It made the time go by quicker and plus one of the girls on the show sort of resembled Bella; she had the same long mahogany locks and slender shape. The only difference was that the woman had blue eyes and a larger nose. As I sat there and watched the woman make out with random guys in a hot tub I began to wonder if Bella was the type of woman to date muliple guys at the same time. I know that's a fucked up thing to think but due to my past experiences I couldn't help but wonder. When the fifth episode of the show ended all of a sudden Seth and Collin ran in the living room with shirts tied around their necks.

"Whoa, whoa fellas. What's the hurry?" I asked.

"We're supa heroes" Collin said as him and Seth ran with their arms out in front of them.

Mom entered the living room smiling, with her apron on "Edward, Why don't you escort these super heroes to the game room"

I stood up from the sofa and stretched. My muscles were stiff from sitting in one position for hours.

"Alright guys. Let's go" I said.

They yelled yay in unison and followed me as I lead them downstairs to the den. The den contained an assortment of games which included a foosball table, a pool table, and PS3 and arcade machines. There was also a lounging area which had a small bar with a refrigerator behind it and a black comfy sofa. This was like Emmett's second room. He spent more time in here than his own room. After practice all his football buddies would pile up in here, play video games and talk about chicks for hours, or until mom threw them out. Some times I'd join them but always wound up leaving after a while; their boisterous behavior and lack of cleanliness was fucking annoying. They always left the den strewed with cans and potato chip bags and I was left to clean it.

Seth and Collin eagerly ran into the room. They went from game to game; so I spent the next hour teaching them how to play each one. They were too young to understand the fundamentals of some of the games but it was still fun to teach them. We were so engrossed in a game of pool, in which we were rolling balls around the table, that we didn't notice when Bella and Alice entered the room. I only noticed because I felt them watching us as they stood by the stairs. They seemed very amused by the boys attempt to play pool preschool style. When Bella wasn't looking I subtly looked her over. She was so beautiful and sexy in sort of an innocent way. She was wearing a grey off the shoulder long sleeve shirt that exposed her neck and collar bone with some dark wash skinny jeans. I imagined tracing a path with my tongue over her smooth creamy skin. I'd start at the top of her shoulder and leisurely make my way across her delicate collar bone then up her neck where I would lightly nip and suck until she's writhing and moaning in ecstasy. The sound of a throat being cleared brought me out of my fantasy. I looked up and see Bella looking down blushing immensely, no doubt from my perusal of her and Alice staring dagger at me. If looks could kill I'd be six feet under right now. Alice walked over to me with her eyes squinted.

"Could you stop with the eye-fucking?" She murmured low enough so only I could hear.

I rolled my eyes at her and looked at Bella. Our eyes locked and I smiled at her and hoped to god I didn't make her uncomfortable; I didn't mean to blatantly gawk at her but I couldn't help it, she was gorgeous. She timidly smiled back. A light blush graced her cheeks and she tucked her hair behind her ear. She looked so innocent and sexy when she did that, that my dick twitched in my jeans and I had to bite my tongue to stifle a groan.

Seth, just noticing his mother's arrival, ran and tackled Bella.

"Mommy, Mommy" Seth said as he hugged Bell's leg. She kneeled down and hugged him.

"Hi baby. I missed you too" She murmured. She affectionately kissed him on the cheek.

"What about you Collin? No hug for mommy?" she asked with her lip pouted, feigning sadness. Collin suddenly ran in Bella's arms, hugging her.

She squeezed both of them in her arms "That's my boys" She murmured

Alice and I smiled at their sweet exchange. Seeing her interact with her sons in such a loving way some how made her even more attractive to me. She was nuturing and tender like my mom was with me. I remember moments when she'd hug me, ruffle my hair and whisper her love for me just before I went to sleep. Those moments were my most cherished. I could tell they would be the same for Seth and Collin.

"Alright boys, Esme said dinner's almost done. Are you ready to eat?" She said. They nodded their heads and she stood up.

Suddenly Mom entered the den and stood by the door. She caught me gazing at Bella and winked at me.

_She was up to something._

"Alice, could you be a dear and set the table? I'm going help the boys get cleaned up for dinner" Alice squinted her eyes at mom suspiciously and walked up the steps.

"Come along boys" Mom said. Seth and Collin ran up the stairs and they all walked out the door.

Bella looked up at me timidly, biting her lip. I raked my hand through my hair and desperately tried to think of anything other than how incredibly sexy that was. If I got a boner right now she'd notice and that would be so fucking humiliating, not to mention it will probably scare the shit out of her.

She smiled softly at me and began to walk around the room; touching everything she gazed at. I stood by the stairs and leaned on the wall, watching her.

"You got a lot of nice stuff in here" She said breaking the silence.

She stopped walking and stood by the fooseball table, looking at it intently. My guess was that she probably was interested in the game or she's trying to avoid looking at me.

I pushed my self off the wall, needing to be near her and walked around the table. Standing beside her "Thanks"

She gazed at me briefly then quickly looked at the fooseball table. _Yeah she was avoiding my eyes_. I noticed she was fidgeting with her hands and biting her bottom lip. As sexy as I thought that little quirk was, I could tell it was a nervous habit. She was nervous. I was making her nervous.

I reluctantly moved back and stood by the bar; putting some distance between us. I didn't want to make her anymore uncomfortable than she already was.

"Do you play?" I asked, gesturing towards the foosball table.

She looked up at me and chuckled lightly "No…What is it?"

I openly gaped at her "You never saw a fooseball table?"

She shook her head and blushed in embarassment. She averted her eyes and I walked to the opposite end of the table.

"It's nothing to be embarrassed about"" I said reassuringly. "Come on, I'll teach you the basics"

She smiled shyly then slowly approached me. As she walked up to me I couldn't help but picture her in a white gown, with a long train trailing behind her and a sparkly sheer veil covering her angelic face. She'd look breath-taking.

Wait a minute. Why the hell am I thinking of shit like that?

I shook my head and immediately dismissed that thought. Later tonight when I'm alone I'll figure out what it meant, but for now my only focus is learning what I could about this enchanting woman.

She stood in front of me and our eyes locked. I was immediately mesmerized by her chocolate orbs. My heart beat sped and fingers twitched, wanting to touch her, as her eyes bore into mine. The moment was so intense; it felt as if we were encompassed in a bubble of electric energy. The same energy I felt when I touched her. My gaze shifted to her small pink lips. I noticed the bottom lip was slightly fuller then the top. They looked deliciously soft and plump. As if she knew what I was thinking, she licked her lips. My body immediately responded to that and I became aroused. I moved back, putting some space between us before things spiraled out of control.

"Um… turn around" I said some what huskily.

I cleared my throat. She blinked twice and turned around. I quickly adjusted myself to keep my obvious erection from her view.

"What now?" she said.

I moved close behind her and was immediately stunned by the scent of her hair. I closed my eyes and took a discreet whiff. She smelled like strawberrys and freesia. So sweet and mouth-watering.

"You grab the rods, push, pull and turn them. The main objective is to get the ball in the opponent's goal while keeping it out of yours" I said, taking a step back before I completely devoured her.

"Oh…o.k, that sounds simply enough" She said. She began demonstrating what I just told her.

She looked at me over her shoulder and smiled. _Damn, everything she does looks sexy. _I smiled back and walked to the other side of the table.

"Alright, you ready to take me on?" I asked grabbing my rods "I have to admit, I'm pretty good at this game but I'll go easy on you"

She arched an eyebrow "Oh really, bring it on" She said playfully

"I got an idea. Whoever makes a goal get to ask a question about the other person" I said. I was determined to know her.

She bit her lip and looked at me nervously. I immediately regretted the idea.

"It's o.k, we'll play it the normal way" I said, a little disappointed but if she was nervous I wouldn't push.

She shook her head "No, No. I like that idea" She smiled at me.

"Alright" I said. I smiled at her and we began to play.

I got the first goal and asked her what her full name was and she responded by saying Isabella Marie Swan. She got the second goal and asked me what was mine and I told her Edward Anthony Masen Cullen. Through out the game I kept the questions simple and easy, I didn't want to make her uncomfortable. I told her I played the piano, I liked to run and my favorite sport was baseball. She told me she liked to read, cook, and she didn't play any sport because she was extremely uncoordinated. I also learned that she was from Phoenix and she lived with her mother and step father.I noticed she was beginning to get uncomfortable with the questions so when I made another goal I backtracked and asked a simple question I was dying to know the answer to.

"So…What brings you to Forks?" I asked

She gazed at me then quickly looked down. She began fidgeting with her hands and biting her lip. _Shit_. _I hit a nerve_

"You don't have to-"

"They died" She murmured. She looked up at me with watery eyes.

"Who?" I asked

"My Mom and step dad. They were killed in a car accident" She said as the tears began to fall down her face.

Her expression was heartbreaking. Immediately hated it; it broke my heart. I rushed to the other side of the table and stood in front of her. I grabbed her hand and she looked up at me, wide-eyed. I wiped the tears from her soft cheeks with my other hand and felt that electric current. She gasped and I wondered if she felt it too.

"I'm so sorry Bella" I murmured.

She nodded her head and closed her eyes as the tears rapidly fell. I gently rubbed circles on her hands, with my thumbs desperately trying to soothe her but that wasn't enough. I wanted to pull her in my arms and tell her she'd be o.k that I'll be there for her I'll be whatever she needed. But I didn't want to make her uncomfortable; she didn't know me well enough. She began to sob uncontrollably and I was fighting the urge, desperately. When her body started to shake and her breathing came out in gasps I couldn't take it anymore and pulled her in my arms. She gripped the front of my shirt and buried her face in my chest as she sobbed. I soothingly rubbed the hair down her back and rocked her.

"Shh…It's going to be o.k Bella" I murmured.

When she looked up at me my heart broke again. Her face and eyes were red and tear streaked.

"You don't understand Edward. Renee was everything to me and my kids, and now we're alone" She sobbed

"That's not true. You got your dad…my Mom, Alice…" I cupped her her face with my hand "…and me" I said earnestly gazing into her eyes

"Look Edward, I'm damaged. I completely out of my mind. My dad can't even go to Pheonix to get my truck without me freaking out… I don't want to bother you guys with that" She said

I grazed her cheek with my thumb "You're not a bother Bella, we want to be there for you"

"We?" She asked

I nervously raked my fingers through my hair and moved back. This is it. This would be the perfect time to tell her that since I met her I couldn't stop thinking about her, I felt inexplicably drawn to her, and I want to help her, protect her, and be with her. Or maybe I should just tell her that I know without a doubt I'm going to fall in love with her. No. Alice will kill me and I promised her I wouldn't pursue Bella; but she did say I could be her friend.

"Bella, I know we just met but…I like you, and I like for us to be friends" I said earnestly

She smiled softly at me "I'd like that too Edward"

Then she shocked me by closing the distance between us and wrapping her arms around my waist, hugging me "Thank you Edward" She whispered

I hugged her back and rested my cheek on her head "You don't need to thank me Bella"

She buried her face in my chest and inhaled. I sighed and reveled in the feeling of having her in my arms. It felt so good and so right. I'd be perfectly content having her in my arms for the rest of my life. I never want to let her go. The feeling was strange and a bit scary because I never experienced it. No woman has ever captured me the way Bella did and it's going to be so hard to be just a friend to her. But I will do it, not because of Alice but because it's what Bella wants. I'm willing to be whatever she needs me to be.

She pulled herself out of my arms and I immediately missed the warmth and closeness. She looked up at me and smiled. I smiled back.

"We should head upstairs, everyone's probably waiting" She said

"Yeah, I don't want Sergeant Alice coming down here to get us" I said

She chuckled "Yeah, she's a bossy little thing"

"I would say you have no Idea, but I'm pretty sure you do" I said, gazing at her.

She looked at me and blushed. She looked so beautiful when she blushed. I felt the need to tell her.

"You know…your blush is really pretty" I said, sounding really juvenile and lame.

Jesus, I sound like a fucking seventeen year old.

She blushed even more and looked down "Um…Thanks,"

"Your welcome." I said, still motified at myself for sounding so stupid.

_Real smooth Edward_

"Well let's get some dinner, Shall we?" I said.

She smiled and nodded her head. We then ascended the stairs side by side and made our way to the dining room.

Dinner was great. Mom made Pot roast potatoes and wild rice which was delicous but that wasn't the great part. The great part was that the table wasn't filled with the awkward silence that I've grown use to. It was filled with the laughter and chatter I always long for. Maybe it was because of the fact that Carlisle was absent. I don't know what it was but Bella seem more at ease at the table. She laughed and smiled at stories Mom, Alice and I shared, of our childhood. She seems to find the fact that I was an awkward nerd in high school interesting because she too was labeled a nerd. She admitted to tripping down halls and steps all through high school. She said that the nurses in the E.R. knew her at a first name basis. I caused her to blush by telling her I'd never let her fall, which earned me a glare from Alice and a discreet wink from Mom. Seth and Collin also joined in on the conversation by telling us how much they like the daycare and their new friends; Bella smiled at that. When our eyes met she didn't look away like she normally does, she smiled. This showed that she's becoming more comfortable with me; and I couldn't be happier. I wanted her to feel that she can let loose and be herself around me because that's what friends want. Right?

Hell, who am I kidding? The feelings I feel for Bella are way beyond friendship. It's going to be so damn hard to remain just her friend; but I will try. For her I'll try.

All too soon dinner was over and it was time for Bella and the boys to go home. I offered to give them a ride but Alice shooed me away, saying something about girl talk and fashion. _Whatever. _Before Bella left I told her I'll be in Port Angeles tomorrow running some errands and asked her if she'd mind if I took her out for lunch. She smiled shyly and said she'd love to. Alice, who was standing behind her squinted her eyes at me and silently mouth 'you promised'. When Bella bent down to fix the boy's jackets I looked at Alice and silently mouth 'friends'. She rolled her eyes, probably not believing me, and walked out the door. I high-fived Seth and Collin and told them the movie should be here in two days. They yelled yay and ran outside with Alice. Bella looked up at me from under her eyelashes and smiled. I stared at her wide-eyed and gulped. _She was flirting with me. _Before I could even utter a word she said she'd see me tomorrow and walked out the door. I stood by the door completely flabbergasted with a raging hard on. I ran upstairs before Mom could see me in my present state, went in the bathroom and took a warm shower.

I got out the shower after I alleviated myself with fantasies of Bella. Then I went to my room and curled up in bed. I sighed and closed my eyes, feeling sated from my self action in the shower. Something told me that this will become my nightly ritual. Bella was a temptress and she didn't even know it. Everything she did I found sexy and enticing but she also had this innocent vibe about her. I mean, she had two kids. Most women with kids lose that whole innocent vibe but not Bella; she was shy and she blushed like a virgin. I have no doubt that the father of Seth and Collin was probably the first and only guy she's been with. I could sense that about her, she wasn't a skank like Tanya and the other whores I slept with.

I yawned and felt myself falling asleep until a thought I repressed earlier resurfaced.

_Bella in a white gown, with a long train trailing behind her and a sparkly sheer veil covering her face._

What I realize now that I didn't earlier was that I imagined Bella getting married. The part that scared the shit out of me was the fact that I imagined her marrying me.

What the fuck?

That realization only confirmed my earlier thoughts. I'm going to fall in love with Bella Swan, hard and fast. And there's nothing anybody could do to stop it.

An: First of all thanks to all the people reading my story. This is the first story I have ever written so I'm really inexperienced at it.

Secondly, I'm not updating frequently because I don't have a Beta anymore (pout) but if there's anybody who isn't too busy and willing to give my story a chance PM me.

And thirdly, Please, Please Please review. A lot of you guys are reading but not enough reviewing.


	8. Chapter 8

**All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**I'm sorry I took a long time to update but real life got in the way and I'm extremely busy. But here it is chapter 8 of FE.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 8- Three's a crowd**

**BPOV**

Oh my god.

I can't believe I just agreed to go on a lunch date with Edward Cullen tomorrow. Well, maybe not a date-date but a friendly date. I don't want to get ahead of myself and assume it was a romantic date because there is no way in hell Edward would want anything romantic with me. I mean look at him. He's a young, handsome man who's intelligent with a bright future while I'm a plain single mom struggling with two kids. Edward would be a fool to want anything beyond friendship. Hell, I don't even know why he wants to befriend me. I'm a loser. Guys like him usually spent their time with beautiful intelligent coeds not dull mousy moms like me; and that confused the hell out of me.

And frankly if I'm being honest with myself he intimidated the shit out of me too. Not in the 'oh my god this guy is dangerous' sort of way but in the 'oh my god this guy is too gorgeous and interesting' kind of way. I mean the way he was staring at me with those piercing green eyes was too much. I felt like I was losing myself every time our eyes locked; like I would submit to his every demand. Which is how I easily I agreed to accompany him to lunch tomorrow. It was like I couldn't say no to him. And that shit was scary.

He was scary

Every time I'm around him it's like he brought out all these emotions in me. Lust, apprehension, fascination and inadequacy. And I didn't like it.

Since I ended things with Jake I made a promise to myself that I would stand clear of men and focus on my children. Men only complicated things and they hurt you; that is if you're in a relationship with them. But being friends with them, I guess… its o.k.

_Right?_

I think I could pursue a friendship with Edward. Despite my obvious attraction to him he seems like generally a good person. Tonight when Alice and Esme left us in the den he was really nice, he even taught me how to play foosball. He turned the game into a twenty questions type of game which made me a little apprehensive but my fascination of him completely over ruled it.

I learned a lot about him throughout the game. And every thing I learn made me feel more and more inadequate. I mean he was like your ideal all American guy. He's rich, handsome, intelligent, athletic and musical.

_Why does he want to be friends with me again? _

I sighed and blocked off the impending negative thoughts about myself. I was a loser and that was that, end of story.

I had a great time getting to know him a little, that is until the he asked me an innocent question that would have been easy for anyone else to answer but heartbreaking for me.

What brought me to Forks?

As soon as the words left his mouth I completely broke down. I thought about losing Phil and Renee. How empty I felt as I watched their bodies be lowered into ground. How alone I am. How alone I'll be.

But to my surprise he did the one thing I least expected him to do.

He wrapped me in his arms and held me.

The electric current that always hummed through my body when we touched, set my body aflame. My whole body tingled, from my head to the tips of my toes. Words can't describe the feeling. His arms were lean and strong; not big and bulky like Jake's. Every time Jake use to hold me I felt like I was trapped in a damn cage or something. But Edward, his arms were perfect around my small frame and strangely I didn't feel uncomfortable I felt…content. I never wanted him to let me go. And his scent, god he smelled so damn good. He smelled so utterly sweet and masculine. It was mouth-watering. All I wanted to do in that moment was lick his neck and savor the taste, which I know would be equally delicious.

_Get a grip Bella_

I shook those thoughts out of my head before they spiraled out of control and I be left with drenched panties and hard nipples. I never been this physically attracted to a man; not even Jake. I mean of course I was attracted to Jake; he had that whole tall dark and handsome image down to a tee, and I did have two children by him. But he was a pig. His idea of being romantic was smacking me on the ass and humping me on a wall. Nothing was ever sweet and gentle with him. He never even gave me a compliment; maybe that's way I'm not good with them. Edward was charming; He said my blush, the one physical reaction of my body that I've always hated, was pretty. He made me blush so much tonight that my face should be permanently red.

Oh god, what am I going to do? I really want to be friends with Edward but I know it's going to be so hard. Especially when every time he looks at me I want to tackle him.

I'll just have to be strong and keep my attraction for Edward at bay. Acting out on my attraction with Edward would only end badly. He maybe a great person to befriend but according to Alice; he's the last person I should even think about pursuing a relationship with. And let face it I'm not a fling or one night stand type of woman. I have baggage. I have children. I thought about the conversation Alice and I had when she drove us home tonight. When she told me not to pine over Edward and that he's not right for me.

_Flashback_

_I Walked out of the Cullen house with a smile plastered on my face, while Alice and the boys waited by the car. _

_As soon as we got in the car I strapped the boy in their car seats that Alice brought against my wishes then we pulled off. _

_The drive home was unusually silent, which confused me. Didn't she say she wanted to talk to me about something? _

_It wasn't like her to be so quiet. Whatever she had to say must be serious and that worried the shit out of me. _

_When she pulled into Charlie's driveway she finally spoke and I braced my self for the 'Bella we can't be friends anymore' speech._

"_Bella" Alice said._

_I turned to her and noticed she had a blank expression on her face._

_Alice, my ever animated friend with a blank expression. This is definitely not good._

"_I know, I know. You don't want to be friends anymore" I Stated _

_Her eyes went wide and she stares at me incredulously_

"_What? I mean, no. Bella that's ridiculous of course I want to be your friend"_

_I sighed in relief "So what up with this whole serious vibe. You been acting strange tonight"_

"_You like Edward" She stated_

_I stare at her dumbfounded "What?_

"_You like Edward" She repeated_

"_Are you telling me or asking me?" I asked_

_She rolled her eyes "I'm telling you"_

"_Oh" I said. Was I that obvious?_

_Alice's expression finally turned into one of concern. _

"_Bella, you can't like Edward. I mean I know you're attracted to him, I see the way you look at him and he-"_

"_Alice we're just friends. I like him, yes… but as a friend." I said, cutting her off._

_She stared at me for a moment then sighed in relief "Thank god. I thought I was going to have to give you the whole Edward is an asshole and he's not right for you speech but you just saved me from it." _

"_I thought you guys made up. You both were friendly and chatty during dinner" I said_

"_We did make up and we're o.k. now, but a zebra doesn't change his stripes. He's my brother I been dealing with his shit for years… I just don't want you to get hurt. I know how my brother could be. I've heard stories about how he's treated his girlfriends…and they weren't pleasant."_

_I placed my hand on her shoulder "You don't have to worry Alice. I'm not going to date your brother or anything like that"_

_She smiled "Good…and don't even think about pining over him"_

_I chuckled "I'm not Alice. You don't have to worry. I don't even think I'm Edward's type anyway"_

_She murmured something but I couldn't hear her because Seth and Collin began yelling in the back seat so I unbuckled their seat belts and we said our goodbyes._

_End of Flashback_

I sighed and frustratingly ran my fingers through my hair.

I'm such a liar. I told Alice I wouldn't pine over Edward but here I am pining over him. I couldn't help though; he's just so beautiful and he was really sweet to me tonight.

_He's only being friendly Bella_

Yeah, I'll have to keep reminding myself. He wants to be there for me as a friend, he likes me as a friend.

Too bad I can't say the same for myself.

XXX

"Good morning Ma'am do you need any help" Emily said to a sweet looking elderly woman.

"Actually the young lady over there was helping me" The woman said pointing to Leah, who was rummaging through a rack of dresses on the opposite side of the store.

Emily looked to where the woman pointed, spotting Leah. She smirked then turned back to the woman.

"Maybe I can help you ma'am."

The old woman smiled at Emily then went in her pocket and pulled out a photo.

"This is my grand daughter Jenny. She's turning thirteen next week and I want to get her something pretty to wear."

Emily examined the photograph and smile at the woman.

"She beautiful, is she from California?"

The woman's eyes lit up "As a matter of fact yes she is. How do you know?"

"Lucky guess, plus the palm trees she's standing in front of sort of helped me" Emily said, pointing to the picture. "So what does she like to dress in?"

"Well she went through a tom boy faze, which lasted several years. She wouldn't even look at a dress…but now her mother told me that all of a sudden she wears dresses skirts and shoes; and that's all thanks to a little boy named Josh Peterson." The woman smiled.

Emily chuckled "Oh, she has a crush. I'll tell you those boys will do it. They'll turn tomboys into beauty queens at the snap of a finger" She said as she snapped her finger.

I rolled my eyes as I folded the last pair of jeans on the shelf. Emily was great with the customers but even I could tell it was all a ruse. She was just doing that to antagonize Leah and make her look bad. This is my third day working here and Emily and Leah has been subtly at each other's throat. They weren't arguing or anything like that, Alice would kill them; but they just made everything into a competition. Customers, hair styles, clothing, you name it. Frankly it was a little annoying and elementary, but everyone just kind of looked the other way and ignored them most of the time.

"Bella, Can I see you in the office for a moment?" Alice said as she peeked out of her office.

I walked to the office, passing Jessica who was annoyingly blowing bubbles with gum. She glanced at me and smiled. I half smiled and shook my head at her immaturity. _Are you kidding me, who the hell does that at work?_

Alice's office was oddly conservative and professional looking. Nothing in that office screamed Alice or her bubbly personality. It was all too conventional and well…boring. The walls were beige, the desk was black and the filing cabinets were white. For a moment I thought I was in some wall street stuffy's office; Not Alice's. As I scanned the room my eyes came across a small portrait of a ballet dancer twirling, on the back wall. I smiled at the sight of it_. At least she brought a hint of her personality to the room. _Alice stood out like a sore thumb. Today she wore a fuchsia ruffled blouse, black jeans and silver heels. She looked like she didn't belong in this room.

She was sitting at her desk typing something on the computer with a far away expression on her face_. Maybe she's busy_

Just as I was about to turn and leave, she looked up at me and smiled.

"Oh, Bella. I'm in love"

She was smiling with that same far away look on her face, what I now realize was a dreamy look. A look one would have for a crush or boyfriend. I arch an eyebrow at her and she smile broadly.

"His name is Jasper Whitlock and I met him online. But before you say anything, he not a psychopath he's my soul mate. I know we are meant to be." She said quickly with that ever present smile plastered on her face.

I sat on the edge of her desk and stare at her humorously "Alice that's crazy. I never pegged you to be one of those online dating fanatics"

"I'm not." She huffed. "Look, I know this sounds crazy but I feel like I was drawn to the site to meet him. You know?"

I rolled my eyes "No I don't know Alice"

She sat up in her chair and gazed at me intensely "Do you believe in fate Bella?"

I was taken aback on how serious she turned the conversation. I mean how the hell you go from being all smiley, talking about an online crush to being serious and asking me about fate.

"I can't say that I do." I bit my lip and ran my fingers through my hair, not really liking where this conversation was heading.

"Well I do. And I happen to believe that certain things in this life happen for a reason and certain people come into your life for a reason."

I was really getting annoyed with all this talk about fate and life. I mean what was the reason behind my mother and step father's death or Jacob's abuse. Was she saying that it was in the cards for my life to be ruin, that some powerful entity or force despised me so much that I was fated to lose everything?

"Alice that's all a bunch of mumbo-jumbo" I said, trying to lighting up the conversation.

She cocked her head to the side and studied me briefly, trying to see through my false façade. I smiled at her and she smiled softly back. _I wonder if she could sense how much this conversation is really affecting me. _

"Well I believe it" she smiled "And Mr. Whitlock and I are destined for each other"

I rolled my eyes and hopped off the desk "Oh, really. And what do you know about Mr. Whitlock? Where is he even from?"

"He's 22, he's from Texas, he goes to U-Dub, he's a psychology major and he has the most gorgeous blue eyes and beautiful blond hair"

"He goes to U-Dub?" She nodded her head "Does he know Edward?"

She shrugged her shoulders "I don't know, I didn't ask. And frankly I'm too embarrassed to ask. If he found out Edward's my brother, I'll never hear from him again."

"So he doesn't know he goes to school with your brother? I asked

"Nope" she replied

"Hmm" I said

"Well, enough talk about my imminent love life. It's almost lunch time. Where are we going today" She asked

I furrowed my brows in confusion. I wonder if she forgot Edward was taking me to lunch today. She probably did with all that talk about her online love and all.

"Um… Edward's going to swing by today" I said, casually.

"Oh, I forgot. Cool, where does he want to go? I hope he doesn't want Chinese because I swear to god, if I eat another Lo Mien I'm going to puke" She said.

Great, I guess Edward and I wouldn't be alone today. Not that, that's what he wanted, He's only being friendly anyway. This was not a date.

I Guess I really have to keep reminded myself that.

"Um, I'm not sure. I guess we'll find out when he comes" I said in a tone laced with disappointment.

She stared at me intently "You o.k. Bella?"

_No, I wanted to be alone with your brother _

I smiled "I'm fine…um… I'm going to sort the shirts on the wall before we head out"

She nodded and turned back to her computer. I walked out and passed Jessica who was ringing up the elderly woman Emily was helping. She looked at me and smiled; I smiled back. She was a sweet looking woman. She kind of reminded me of my grandma Marie.

Emily walked pass me and approached the woman again.

"Here you go Miss Doris. This will look beautiful in Jenny's hair and it goes great with the dress" Emily said, handing the woman 'Doris' a white head band with a bow on it.

"Thank you Emily, you've been a big help to me" Doris said

"No problem Doris. Wish jenny a happy birthday for me" Emily smiled and walked away.

I walked to the back of the store and started sorting the shirts that were hanging up. Leah suddenly approached me with a scowl on her face. She began rummaging though the clothing a little too roughly; her frustration and anger clearly getting the best of her.

"Leah you're going to tear the fabric. Stop it!" I said snatching the shirts from her.

She huffed "That bitch Emily is always stealing from me. She stole my man, Steals my customers and now she's trying to steal my job"

I wanted to say 'I could related, I worked with a bitch that stole my man too' but that would mean I'd have to talk about Jake and Lauran and I wasn't ready for the people of Fork to know about my pathetic excuse of a life in Phoenix.

"Um…" I said but was interrupted by someone grabbing my forearm. I gasped. My skin tingled and I felt that pleasant warmth run though my body. Only one person can elicit that kind of response in me.

Edward.

I turned around and gazed from his perfect muscular forearm all the way up to his emerald orbs. Our eyes locked. He was giving me that intense look that always seemed to hypnotize me and make me feel like I was in some sort of a trance. My pulse raced; then his mouth turned up and formed that amazing crooked smile.

"Hi." He said

I blinked twice; breaking out of the dazzle fog he seems to always engulf me in

"Hi"

He ran his finger through his hair and smiled "Are you ready?"

I smiled at him then looked toward Alice's office "Um…I'll have to check with Alice"

He smiled politely at Leah, who was openly gaping at him. Her eyes were shifting from him to me like she couldn't believe someone that good looking was going out with me. And frankly I couldn't blame her. I didn't believe it either.

"I'm sure you could leave now. It's your lunch break" He said staring at me intently. _Oh why does he have to look at me like that?_

"Um… I know but Alice will be upset if we left her" I said averting my eyes.

His eyebrows rose "Oh…She's coming with us" He stated, sounding disappointed.

I looked up at him to gauge his expression and he smiled. But it wasn't the same crooked smile he gave me a minute ago and it didn't reach his eyes.

He was disappointed.

The teenage girl in me squealed at the revelation; but the rational adult in me remembered that this wasn't a date but a friendly outing.

_He's only being friendly, Bella_

Oh yeah, he's probably disappointed because he wanted to get to know me without Alice's interference. I could understand that. In the short time that I've known Alice I learned that she could be quitemeddlesome and extremely talkative. I mean, I really loved her spunky personality but sometimes it can be a little tiresome. Edward seem like the quiet type; not shy quiet like me, but pensive. Maybe he wanted to have a nice quiet lunch without Alice's usual liveliness.

"I'll tell her you're here" I said

He nodded and I walked to Alice's office, but all of a sudden Jessica hopped over the counter and ran by me; nearly knocking me over. _What the hell?_

"Sorry Bella" She said, gazing dreamily at Edward. He looked at her wide eyed like she just escaped from a psychiatric ward.

"Hi Edward" she said dreamily.

"Um…hi…uh…" Edward said scratching his head, trying to think of her name.

"Jessica! My name is Jessica!" She quickly shouted.

Leah and I gaped at her._ This girl is nuts._

Her hair was wild from running and her eyes were dilated from…excitement I guess. She really did look like a psychopath. Like one of those crazed obsessed fans that kept locks of hair and sweaty t-shirts of the object of their obsession tucked neatly under their pillow. I have no doubt she'd steal a lock of Edward's hair if given the opportunity.

Jessica brazenly eyed Edward like he was a piece of meat; not aware of me, Leah and now Alice looking at her incredulously. Edward ran his hand through his already tousled hair making it stick up even more. Giving him that I just got out of bed and I don't give a shit look that only he could pull off. He looked like pure sex; like a Calvin Klein model.

I noticed he ran his fingers through his hair a lot when he was nervous. It pissed me the hell off that Jessica was making him nervous and uncomfortable with her lustful looks. I didn't like the way she was looking at him, like he wasn't a person but an object.

_Slut_

"Uh…yeah Jessica, how's it going?" He asked

She licked her lips and smiled seductively at him "Good. But now that I've seen you, even better"

Does she seriously not notice the audience she created? Now customers were amusingly watching the scene. _Slut_

"Ooo.k" Edward said, stretching out the 'O'.

Jessica giggled, sounding like fucking Fran Drescher and placed her hand on his forearm. My eyes zoomed in on her hand on him and I couldn't hide the look of distaste on my face. I mean who the hell did she think she was?

As I stared at her hand on him I had the sudden urge dig my nails into her skin and pry her fingers off him. It's irrational I know, but I didn't like her touching him. It made me…..jealous.

Just when I thought the worst was over; the slut pulled out a lollipop. She began sucking it provocatively, trying to entice Edward and to my satisfaction he rolled his eyes and chuckled lightly under is breath. _Yeah this slut was hilarious _

"Mmm….this flavor is delicious. You know, some people say I have an oral fixation." She twirled her tongue around the lollipop.

Leah snickered and I stared at Jessica opened mouthed.

_Slut_

Edward shifted uncomfortable, looking around for someone to help him out. He's probably too polite to tell the slut to get lost. His eyes locked on mine and I was more than happy to save him.

I sauntered up to him with a smile plastered on my face "Are you ready to go,"

He sighed in relief and smiled "Whenever you are,"

Jessica looked from Edward to me and squinted her eyes suspiciously "Where are you two off to?" she said with venom in her voice.

Just then Alice approached us, handing me my bag and jacket. She looked at Jessica and rolled her eyes.

"We are going to lunch, so be sure to remain at your station while I'm gone….oh and if I see you jumping over my counter again I'll have your ass assigned to the stock room" Alice smiled

Jessica scowled, turned and stomped back to her station. Alice and I looked at the stun expression on Edward's face, looked at each other, then laughed.

Edward looked at both of us sporting a frown on his face "That's not funny. I seriously feel like I just been violated"

"Oh, Eddie stop it. You know you love Jessica" Alice joked

He turned to her and scowled "Right, Just as much as I love sunburn and peanuts"

"Peanuts?" I asked, arching an eyebrow at him.

He looked at me and smiled "I'm allergic to peanuts"

"Yeah you should have seen him when he ate my Butterfinger" Alice chuckled

Edward rolled his eyes and I smiled. I loved to hear stories about some of the wacky antics siblings get into; being an only child and all.

"Alice, I was eight years old and I didn't know Butterfinger's had peanut butter in it"

"I know that's what makes it so funny. You tried to be spiteful and mean to me and ended up with hives all over your body" She laughed

Edward scowled "That's not funny. I was out of school for a week"

Alice laughed even harder "Yeah…Yeah, But the funniest part of all is that when he returned to school everybody, including the gym teacher Mr. Fisher kept repeating-"

"Nobody better lay a finger on my Butterfinger" They said in unison.

I laughed so hard that there were tears in my eyes. Edward gaped at me and Alice laughed right along with me.

"When he was out, I told the entire school what he did to me. How he stole from me." Alice said.

"Please Alice, it was only a damn piece of candy" He said

"Yeah but when you're a kid candy is like money. I was devastated" She said placing her hand on her chest.

Edward rolled his eyes and muttered what sounded like 'so damn dramatic' under his breath.

I smiled and looked up at Edward "Wait a minute, if you didn't know peanut butter was in a Butterfinger, what did you think was in it butter and a finger?"

Alice laughed so hard I thought she was on the verge of passing out. Edward squinted his eyes at me and I innocently smiled back.

"Oh, you think you're funny, uh." He walked up to me and stood in front of me.

I looked up at him and shook my head. He gazed in my eyes and smiled at me.

I turned my head and Alice was staring daggers at Edward. Looking pissed _I wonder what that's about._

He followed my gaze and sighed. Then he shook his head.

"Alright ladies let's get some grub"

We walked to the entrance and out of the shop. As soon as we step outside we were greeted with a cloudless sky and warm weather. It felt great. I decided to leave my jacket off and enjoy the feel of the sun on my bare forearms. Today I was wearing another outfit Alice put together. It was a ¾ inch sleeve olive tunic blouse, dark wash skinny jeans and a pair brown boots that came up to my knee. It was the best outfit yet; I was comfortable. And I'm not going to lie, I felt sexy as hell.

We began walking down the street passed all the stores and shops; where people were standing outside enjoying the beautiful weather also. Suddenly Edward and Alice stopped by a silver Volvo. He took his keys out and pushed a button, unlocking the doors.

"Do we seriously need to ride in your car?" Alice asked, displeased.

"Um…let me think about it…yes" He replied

Alice stuck her tongue at him, murmured 'whatever' and hopped in the front seat. Edward opened the rear door for me and I smiled politely as I got in. Then he got in the driver's side buckled up and drove off.

Throughout the ride Alice talked non stop about her online romance with Mr. Whitlock or 'Jay' which she refers to him in front of Edward. She talked about dating him, her future wedding with him; she even went as far and talked about the possible names of their children.

_Sheesh _

As I listened to her plan out her whole entire future with a man she never met Edward stayed quiet. Every once in a while he glanced at me through the rear view mirror and smiled. I always blushed, averted my eyes, and looked out the window.

_Why does he keep looking at me like that? _

And that smile. I think I found a word to describe his smile.

_Panty dropper. _

_Panty dropper smile._

Perfect.

XXX

We arrived at a quaint little diner just outside of Port Angeles called Martha's. It looked a lot like Chelsea's but much, much older.

We immediately got out of the car and I watched as Alice and Edward looked at each other with matching smiles on their faces. Something told me that this diner held some kind of significance to them.

"Why didn't I ever think of coming here for lunch?" Alice said to no one.

Edward looked at her a smirked "Maybe you forgot"

"Pul-leeze, like I could ever forget about Martha's famous Flap Jacks"

"Don't forget about the strawberry syrup" He added

"How could I" She replied

We entered the diner, found a booth in the back and sat down. When the waitress arrived they ordered flap jacks with strawberry syrup and convinced me to order the same. While we waited for our food they told me a little about their history at Martha's. They told me how their family use to come here every Saturday morning when they were kids. It was a tradition. And every time they came here they always order the same thing. Flap jacks with strawberry syrup. When our food arrived we gobbled it up enthusiastically. I had to admit, it was the best damn flap jacks I've ever tasted and the strawberry syrup was the icing on the cake.

"So Bella, are you excited about Friday night?" Alice asked

I groaned and wiped the excess syrup from my mouth. Edward looked up at me and smirked.

"What's going on Friday night?" He asked

"We're going out to a club with Rose" she said

"Ah…Rose. The bane of my existence" I arched an eyebrow at his comment but Alice answered.

"Edward and Rose are mortal enemies" she said "Which is weird since he had like the biggest crush on her" She chuckled

He squinted his eyes at her, looking pissed "Alice" he said in warning

She chuckled "No…No. Bella's gonna hear this" She said "Alright…Edward was totally lusting after Rose for years; he even dry humped her in the seventh grade. Anyway one day when we were in high school, me and Rose found Edward's journal in his locker. We got curious and read it. And do you know what in it?"

I shook my head and Edward groaned, placing his hands on his head.

"Well, it was about a hundred pages all about Rosalie" She said

Edward slapped his hands on the table "What the fuck Alice"

I jumped in shock at Edward's outburst. _Damn he must be really embarrassed_. Although I couldn't for the life of me understand why. Rosalie was hot. Anybody with an XY chromosome probably lusted after her. Hell, if I were a man I'd lust after her.

Alice laughed " 'Oh Rose is so fucking hot….Oh my god I want fuck her so bad…Oh man I jerked off so much thinking about her…Shit I wonder how it would feel to be buried in…"

"Jesus Alice, shut the fuck up!" Edward shouted, making me jump again.

Alice laughed harder until her eyes watered while Edward fumed. I just sat there in silence not knowing what to do. Do I laugh? Do I get angry? Shit I was confused.

Edward ran his fingers through his hair roughly, pulling at the ends a little.

"You know, when I invited Bella to lunch I did not intend for it to go like this" He said, calmly

"Aww Eddie, Are you saying that you didn't want me to come?" she pouted her lips "you hurt my feelings"

"Do not call me that!" He said "And no, I didn't want you to come. I invited Bella"

Alice stood up and crossed her arms "Well tough tittie. I know you asked her…and you must be fucking crazy if you thought I was going to leave my friend alone with you. To get tangled in your web you fucking spider!"

Edward quickly stood up "Did you just call me a spider? You fucking midget! And what the fuck are you talking about 'tangled in my web' all I wanted was to have a peaceful lunch with a new friend, but you had to ruin it all by telling her embarrassing shit about me!"

"Yeah, well she needs to know what a horny jerk are!" Alice shouted

"Fuck you, Half Pint!" He shouted

"Fuck You Ass-wipe!" She shouted

They huffed and put money on the table. Then they both stormed out of the diner, leaving me sitting their mouth agape.

_What the fuck just happened here?_

I called the waitress over to give her the money for the food. She was a middle age tired looking woman. She took the money for the food and I told her to keep the extra as a tip.

"Are you o.k. honey" she said "What happened here?"

I shook my head, still in a daze "I. have no idea."

XXX

Please review I would love to hear what you guys have to say.


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 9- Meddling siblings**

**EPOV**

_What the fuck is her problem?_

Meddling fucking pixie.

Why the fuck would she tell Bella that shit? I mean, does she get a kick out of annoying the shit out of me and making my life hell?

_Yeah, jackass _

Which explains why she tried to humiliate me by bringing up that shit about Rosalie; but the only thing she really succeeded in doing was infuriating me. I wasn't embarrassed about that shit; I was young, horny and I wanted to fuck the hot older chick that was also my sister's friend. That wasn't a crime. Every guy wanted to fuck Rosalie and those who didn't were gay. Anyway, I stopped liking her ass after the whole journal fiasco and when I found out what a real bitch she was. It wasn't some sappy story of unrequited love; I was a horny teenager that wanted to fuck Rosalie, end of story.

_But, fuck_

I wanted Bella to have a good impression of me. I didn't want her linking horny adolescent Edward with present day Edward. I wanted her to see the gentleman in me; but unfortunately my meddling sister had other plans. Alice always has something up her sleeves. She never just does anything without an ulterior motive; especially in my case. So when she pull Operation: Fuck this shit up for Edward, and started telling Bella about my horny adolescent days I knew what she was trying to do. She was trying to turn Bella away from me. She thinks by telling Bella about my past; she'll eventually run away from me, kicking and screaming. Like I'm some kind of fucking predator and Bella is the innocent unsuspecting prey that I'm trying to devour; or in Alice's words 'tangle in my web'. When in fact I have no intention of 'tangling her in my web' were just friends…

Alright I'm full of shit. I do want Bella in a non friendly way but I would never act out on my attraction to her. She said she wants to be friends and like I said before; I'll be anything she needs me to be. So friend I am. And even if I were to act out on my attraction to her I would never 'tangle her in my web'. She's too good for that. I know she's not like the other sluts I dealt with and whether Alice believes it or not, I actually respected Bella.

I sighed and finally pulled myself off my sofa. I've been sitting here brooding over this shit all afternoon. After I dropped Alice and Bella off at Eclipse I went straight home, smoked about five cigarettes then plopped on my sofa.

My day was ruined.

I only wanted to have a nice peaceful lunch and get to know a beautiful and intriguing woman. Was that too much to ask for?

_Obviously it was._

"Edward… Edward darling" Mom said as she knocked on my door.

"Yeah Mom, what's up" I said rummaging through my dresser looking for a T-shirt to put on. The one I was wearing smelled like cigarettes and Mom will go fucking berserk if she smelled tobacco on me.

"I was wondering if you can entertain the boys while I get dinner started" She asked

I put on a grey T-shirt and opened the door for her. "Alright Mom I'll…"

"Edwood, Edwood!" Collin suddenly came barreling in my room and began jumping on my sofa. I stared at him mouth agape while Mom chuckled humorously behind me.

"Hey, slow your row buddy." I said. He giggled, completely ignoring me. "Hey Bud…Let me enlighten you on a couple of rules, when your in my room" He stopped jumping and stared at me intently "Rule number one; no and I mean no going on the balcony. It's too dangerous. Rule number two; do not touch anything on this wall and this dresser" I pointed to my cd collection on the wall and my dresser, which held my beloved stereo. "…and rule number three, no jumping or standing on my sofa. It's my favorite place to sit and think. Okay?"

I looked behind me and noticed that Mom discreetly slipped out of my room. She probably left during my speech. She knew how I was about my room. No one was allowed in unless invited but I'm willing to make an exception for Seth and Collin and …Bella.

"Yes… Can I jump on your bed then?"

I was about to tell him no but I lost my resolve as soon as I looked at his brown puppy dog eyes and pouted lip. He really looked like Bella when he did that.

"Okay, you can jump on my bed"

Collin yelled 'yay' then climbed on my bed and started jumping. I sat on my sofa and watched him enjoy himself. He really does look like Bella. With the exception of his russet skin tone and black hair.

"Hey buddy, where's your brother?"

"He's downstairs" He replied as he continuously jumped on my bed.

"Don't you want go with him? It's nothing to do in here." I said, hoping he would say yes so he could stop jumping on my bed.

He shook his head "Nope. I like jumping. Mommy and Daddy never let me jump on the bed."

I sat up a little straighter at that. This is the first time I heard anything about their father, and I had to admit I was a bit curious about him. I mean where the hell is the guy? Is he dead? Or is he one of those dead beat dad dudes, and left them.

"Your Mom and Dad never let you jump on the bed?" I asked, feeling a little bad about fishing for information from a three year old.

He shook his head "Daddy gets mad at me and mommy all the time"

"He does?" I asked

He nodded his head "He yells and make mommy cry"

I had a feeling that guy was a fucking jerk. Any guy who causes that amazing woman to cry is a jerk in my book_. A fucking jerk_.

He stopped jumping and laid down, curling up in the middle of my bed.

"I'm tired of jumping Edwood" He said, drowsily.

I chuckled "I bet you are. Are you cold?" He closed his eyes and nodded his head.

I got up and went in my closet, pulled out my quilt and covered him. He was fast asleep. So I quietly padded across the room to my desk and booted up my laptop so I could check my emails. When my emails were finally on the screen I groaned at the sight of them. I had fifteen fucking emails from _TDenali883. What the fuck?_ Who the hell emails someone fifteen fucking times in a row? A psychopath, that's who. Tanya and that other chick Jessica need to seriously meet and become bff's or some shit because both of those chicks were bat-shit crazy. The only difference is that I never fucked Jessica…_ Are you kidding_? I wouldn't hit that shit with a ten foot pole.

I can't blame anyone for this situation but myself. I shouldn't have fucked Tanya again. It was a huge mistake but what was I suppose to do? I was really stressed out and I haven't had sex in weeks thanks to the 'I really need to focus on my academics speech' I gave to my regular Kate. I spent days and countless hours hunched over textbooks and relentlessly typing on my laptop. My grades were slacking and I needed to seriously get my shit together to maintain my 4.0. Any way all hell broke loose when I went to that fuck-awful party then I apparently left with Tanya. The next day I woke up, she was there and I seriously needed to relieve some of the tension from my body before I exploded. But fuck! I regretted that shit. Now she's clingier than ever. The fucking bitch followed me to Forks for fucks sake. And finding out she's Rosalie's cousin was the icing on the cake. If Alice ever finds out about Tanya, she will make the rest of my stay at Forks a living hell.

_Knock, Knock, Knock _

I quickly stood from my desk to answer the door. I didn't want the noise to wake Collin; I heard about kids when their woken up. And the last thing I want is a grouchy kid, crying in my bed. _No thank you_

I pulled the door open and there stood my own personal goddess; looking beautiful as ever. The olive blouse and tight jeans she wore today fit her like a second skin. I never saw a woman look so classy and sexy in my life. She was a ten, the perfect woman.

She gazed at me timidly from under her eyelashes. Then she bit her lip and her cheeks tinged that lovely rose color. _Shit_.I felt my self harden instantly.

"Hi" she said shyly, tucking her hair behind her ear._ What I wouldn't give to be able do that. _

"Hi" I said, trying to subtly adjust my self but failing miserably. Shit, I guess I'll have to wait until she turned her head or something_. Please don't look down._

I pulled at my shirt a little but it wasn't long enough to cover me so I settle for crossing my arms low, at my hips_. God, I hope I don't look weird._

"Um…your mom said Collin was in here with you"

"Yeah he is" I opened the door a little wider "and as you can see, he's knocked out. You know, jumping on beds really wear you out" I smiled

She blushed, turning her whole face red "Oh, I'm so sorry Edward. That was rude of him. He knows he's not suppose to jump on beds"

She walked by my bed and shook him a little but he was sound asleep. I took that opportunity to adjust myself and hide my straining erection from her view.

"Its fine Bella, leave him. I told him he could jump on my bed. No biggie" I closed the door behind me.

She sighed and moved from my bed as I stood by the door, fantasizing about her sprawled out on my bed with her bare limbs tangled in my sheets. _Fuck! _My erection throbbed at that thought._ No, this is not the time. _I'm going to seriously need to perform some self action tonight. _Pronto_

I shook my head and adjusted myself again while she slowly perused my room. She began walking around, touching things that captured her attention. Just like she did in the den, and I didn't freak out. Which was weird because I didn't normally allow people to come in my room and touch shit but Bella…having her in my room felt so natural. Like, she belonged in here; _belonged with me_. I didn't give two shits if she touched my stuff. Hell, she could touch anything she wanted to.

She stopped at my cd wall and eyed it curiously.

"Wow, you have so much music."

I slowly moved toward her and was stunned by the scent of her hair when I stood behind her. My erection throbbed again. _Fuck! Strawberries._

"I'm a…bit of a music junkie" I closed my eyes and took a discreet whiff.

She chuckled "I can see that"

"Music is calming" I stated

"Yeah, it is." she walked to my stereo and I followed "What are you listening to?" She turned the stereo on and the soothing melody of Debussy wafted through the room.

She stood there a moment, listening to the music then her body began to sway, side to side along to the music. I became temporary mesmerized with her gentle movements.

"It's Debussy" I murmured

She turned around and her eyes widened at my proximity. Her eyes traveled from my shoulders to my eyes. "Claire de Lune is great."

She was beautiful, interesting and she knew classical music. Can this woman be anymore perfect?

Her eyes bore into mine with so much intensity that I was rendered speechless. She was magnificent. Her beautiful, sweet smelling chestnut hair curled loosely around her perfect face and flowed over her shoulders to her back. What I wouldn't give to run my fingers though it at this moment.

We stood there silently gazing at each other while listening to my own personal form of Xanax. My fingers twitched and I got the sudden urge to feel her soft body against mine again. Ever since that day in the den, when she let me hold her - it's all I've been able to think about. Obsess about. I wanted; no I needed to touch her.

Before I could pull it back; my hand lightly gripped her waist on its own accord. She gasped and looked down at the hand currently gripping her waist, pulling her in. I got a little bolder and grasped her hand in mine. I slowly began to sway and move my feet to the music. She swayed a little and moved her feet a bit awkwardly.

Then she stared up at me in amusement. I arched an eyebrow in questioning.

"What?" I smiled

"Um…I can't dance" She said

I chuckled "Well…looks like your dancing to me" I spun her under my arms to emphasize my point "It's all about leading"

"I beg to differ. Especially if your partner is severely uncoordinated"

"Well…I can assure you that my partner; uncoordinated or not will move as graceful as a swan, while dancing with me."

She chuckled "Are you some kind of a magician?"

I dipped her backwards and watched as her chestnut locks flew behind her. She chuckled and I smiled at the sound of it.

"I'm whatever you want me to be" I said, earnestly. Hoping that she understood just how true that statement was.

She gazed at me, intensely. Then I slowly pulled her up and noticed something different in her eyes. Her normally chocolate eyes were much darker filled with some kind of emotion which looked similar to…_desire? _My pulse raced as my eyes automatically shifted to her lips. They looked so inviting; so plump, pink and perfect. I wanted to taste them, so bad. She licked her lips and a low groan escaped me. _I needed to taste them_. I needed her mouth on mine just like my lungs needed air. I lick my lips and slowly leaned in. Her eyes fluttered and closed_. So beautiful. _She tilted her head and…

_Knock Knock Knock_

"Hey ass-wipe, did you see Bella?" Alice shouted from outside the door.

_Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! _

Bella blinked and moved back, releasing herself from my arms. She blushed then covered her face with her hands.

"Ohmygod, Ohmygod. I'm so embarrassed" she murmured to herself.

I raked my fingers through my hair and sighed as she turned around facing the wall.

"Bella…"

"I'm so sorry Edward" She said.

My eyes widened at her apology. Why is she sorry? Is she sorry we stopped? Or is she sorry my meddling sister interrupted? I know that's why I'm sorry.

"Bella, why are you apologizing?"

I internally crossed my fingers; hoping, praying that she's not sorry for what I think she's sorry for.

"That was wrong. That shouldn't happened" She whispered

_Shit!_

She turned around and faced me; I immediately didn't like the remorse in her eyes. _She really was sorry_. _No_! I walked up to her and stood in front of her.

"Bella, that wasn't your fault it was mine and…"

Knock Knock Knock

"Ass-wipe, tell Bella to come out. Now" Alice shouted.

I groaned in annoyance. _Fucking pixie. _

I couldn't let this go on any longer. I have to tell her. I can't let her walk out this door without her knowing how I felt. How she consumes my every thought.

"Bella, listen I really l…"

"What the hell?" Alice said as she barged in my room with a scowl on her face.

"Fuck, Alice. I didn't tell you to come in!" She looked from Bella to me with squinted eyes.

"Looks like I barged in here just in time" She approached me and crossed her arms on her chest.

"You know, you are so fucking annoying to be so tiny" I seethed.

She flipped me the bird then turned her attention to Bella. She frowned as she noticed her expression.

"What's the matter Bella?" Alice asked, generally concerned. Bella shook her head.

Alice then turned toward me with fire in her eyes.

"What the hell did you do to her?" She growled poking my chest with her finger.

Bella tapped Alice on the shoulders "Alice, he didn't do anything. We were just discussing music and I got a little sentimental, that's all"

Now I was pissed. Who the fuck does she think she is? Why should me or Bella explain anything to her?

She's taking this meddling shit too far.

I glared at her "You know what Alice; this is none of your f …"

"Mommy!" Collin suddenly bolted out of bed and ran in Bella's arms.

"Hi baby" She said as she kneeled down and kissed his hair sweetly. "Did you have a good day today?"

"Yes!" Collin said enthusiastically. "The best day ever"

Collin stood there and told Bella all about his 'Best day ever'; complete with a song and dance. She was so engrossed with his story that she didn't notice the intense stare down Alice and I was having. I felt like I was in a fucking John Wayne western; she glared at me and I glared at her. And, Just like in those westerns; she reached in her pocket slowly and pulled out a…phone? I arched an eyebrow in questioning and she smirk. _Shit, this is not good. _She pushed a few buttons then turned the phone toward me. I bent my head to look on the screen and what I saw made my fucking stomach flip. _Tanya Denali_

_Fuck, Fuck, Fuck _

How the fuck did she get Tanya Denali's number?

Rosalie.

Fuck, I should have known that shit was inevitable. Tanya is Rosalie's cousin and Rosalie is Alice's friend and Alice is Bella's friend. Everybody was fucking linked. Fuck. Alice, having my stalker's number can only end one way. _Fucked up_. I got some major ass kissing to do; because I'll be damned if I see that fucking psycho sitting across from my mother and Bella at dinner.

Not fucking going to happen!

"What's the matter Eddie? Cat got your tongue" She smirked

Bitch

"Um… Alice can I talk to you in private" I murmured calmly, trying desperately to rein in my temper.

Bella, sensing the tension in the room immediately excused herself and Collin from the room. When they walked out the door, I locked it and turned toward Alice menacingly, with my arms crossed.

"I know what you're up to and this shit ends today" I said lowly

She smirked "I have no idea what you're talking about, my dear brother"

I slowly approached her, holding on to my temper for dear life.

"Oh, you know exactly what I'm talking about. How the fuck did you get that number?" I said, pointing to her phone.

She held her phone up "Oh, this number? Rosalie gave it to me today. You see, her cousin's in town and we're all going to meet up and do lunch tomorrow"

_That's it, now I'm pissed. _My temper unraveled with the force of a fucking explosion.

"No, you're fucking not" I growled

She rolled her eyes "Come on Edward, do you really think you itimidate me?"

I closed my eyes and tried to control my anger because that's what she wants. She wants me to get riled up; it would only make her devious plans much more satisfying.

"Alice, you don't understand" I said somewhat calmly

"Yes I do my dear brother. I understand that you and Tanya have a little something going on and you don't want her around me and Bella" she said pointing her finger at me.

"Yes, that's true …I mean no I don't have shit going on with her. Fuck" She gave me a satisfying smirk "Alice why are you doing this?"

"I'm doing this because you promised not to try anything with her" She walked up to me and poked me in my chest "…and I walk in here finding you all over her, about to kiss her." She argued

"Alice, we were just fucking dancing."

"What kind of dancing was that? The 'come on baby; shove your tongue down my fucking throat dance.' I mean what the fuck Edward? She's not one of your whores. Speaking of whores I have to give my new found whore bff Tanya a ring" she chuckled "She fucking rocks?"

Now my temper was at an all time high. Not even the fucking pope could calm me down. Who did she think she was fucking with and how the fuck did she know Tanya anyway?

"How the fuck do you know her?"

"Me and T go way back. I met her a year ago at a party in Seattle, which was fucking awesome by the way. Anyway, Rose introduced us and boy…what a slut; I mean throughout the whole party she was kissing random guys, letting them grope her and hump her; sheesh! It was like having a fucking porno acted out in front of you. Someone even said she let like six guys ride a train on her, whatever the fuck that means…I mean seriously what the fuck did they do take her ass to a train station?"

Yeah, that sounds like the Tanya we all know and love.

I rolled my eyes at my clueless sister.

"Alice, the phrase riding a train refers to a female who lets a bunch of guys have sex with her, one after the other."

She gaped, in horror "Eww…I take it back. She's not a mere whore she's the fucking queen whore. I mean, Edward what are you thinking. She could be a carrier of all types of fucking viruses. Shit, she probably created her own virus. Tanmydia, Tanyaphillis, Tanerpes tan…

"Jesus Alice, shut the fuck up!" I went to my desk and pulled out a cigarette before walking to the balcony. _I needed to fucking smoke _"And F-fucking Y-I, I always protected myself with her."

I stepped out on the balcony and lit my cigarette, taking a deep drag of it. She followed behind me leaning against the rail; coughing as the smoke blew in her direction.

"Jesus. H Christ Edward, burn my fucking lungs why don't you." She said, coughing.

I ignored her and continued to take drags of my beloved nicotine stick. She huffed and waved her hands, trying to divert the smoke. It was really fucking irritating.

"You don't like it? Get the fuck out then"

"I will as soon as…" Suddenly her phone rang. She looked at the screen and an evil looking smirk that could seriously beat the grinch's shit grin hands down, lit up on her face.

_Oh shit, this is definitely not good_

"Just what I've been waiting for" She said suspiciously. She walked out the balcony slamming the door shut behind her.

Bitch

I smoked the last of my cigarette, stubbed it and leaned against the rail. I know I should probably find out what that evil fucking pixie is up to but I honestly don't have the fucking strength. She's been seriously fucking with me all day and right about now I'm fucking drained. I mean what the fuck was her problem? I get that she's trying to protect her friend from getting hurt but this was ridiculous. It's like she made it her life's mission to keep Edward away from Bella or some shit. If I didn't know any better I would have thought she had some strange lesbian obsession with Bella…It's still a possibility, so I'm not going to automatically rule it out. But fuck, Am I really that fucking bad?

I know I had my share of one night stands and not so monogamous relationships, but so does ninety percent of the male population between the ages of sixteen to twenty-five. Who the fuck is perfect?

_Bella…she's perfect_

Yes, she is. She's the epitome of perfection. Everything about her draws me to her; her looks, her smell, her personality, every fucking thing. It's insane to feel this way about someone I didn't even know for a week; I still don't know her whole story ,but I know enough to know that she's an amazing mother of two who's been through some shit that she's not comfortable talking about. And I will make it my life's mission to gain her trust and show her that I'm someone who will never break it. She could count on me.

I walked out of the balcony, into the room and was overwhelmed by the over powering stench of tobacco. It coated the room in a thick smoky haze. _Fuck._ I'm quite partial to the smell but unfortunately my mom would fumagate this fucking room if she came up here. So I quickly ran in my bathroom and opened up the cabinent under the sink, which held the cleaning products. I rummaged through the cabinent until I found Lysol disinfectant spray. I shook the can, ran back into the room, and sprayed it throughout the room. The strong fumes caught in my throat and I began to cough so I opened the French door, letting the room air out a little. I took a final whiff and was satified when all I smelled and tasted was fucking Lysol. Shit, it was the best I could do. I changed my shirt again and decided to head downstair. My fucking room reeked of disinfectant spray, like some germaphobic recluse's house and I really wanted to see if Bella was o.k. She seemed pretty upset after the whole almost-kiss thing that unfortunately she regretted. I didn't understand, it seemed like she wanted to kiss me too; but I guess I was wrong.

Maybe she didn't want me.

I tried to ignore the jolt of pain in my chest, at that thought. Of course she didn't want me, she only saw me as a friend, a friend who tried to devour her mouth and suck on her luscious full lips. Shit! What the hell was wrong with me? She needed a friend and I fucking took advantage of her by trying to kiss her. I am an ass. I guess I'll have to control my urges a little better when I'm around her, in order to build and maintain our friendship and hopefully more in the future; because let's face it I'm hoping that this friendship will evolve into something more.

I left the room and stepped into the hall. I saw Mom approaching me looking a little too fucking excited.

She smiled "Edward! I was just coming to get you" She sniffed the air "Have you been cleaning?

I strugged my shoulders and we began walking down the hall. I noticed she had a little bounce in her step and frankly it was annoying the shit out of me. It reminded me too much of Alice and I was so pissed at her right now.

"Um…Mom? What's up? Why are you so…happy?" I asked as we descended the stairs.

"Oh, Edward I'm always happy" she replied

"Not like this. You're practically leaping down the fuc…" she squinted her eyes at me "…I mean, freaking stairs"

When we reached the landing I began to feel strange. Something's up and I have a feeling wasn't good.

"Well if you must know, we have company tonight" she said

When I entered the living my eyes immediately spotted Bella. She was sitting on the sofa engaged in a conversation with…Rosalie?

Fuck, this is not good.

I spotted Alice by the fireplace. She was smirking at me evilly, then she silently mouthed 'Don't fuck with me'…I think.

Shit this is really not good. If Rosalie's here and Alice is standing there smirking like the devil himself that mean…

"EDDIE!"

I turned around and there she was. Tanya; the psycho, the stalker, the bane of my existence.

Fuck my life.

Be kind and please review. Whether you hated it or loved it review.


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 10- Impulsive behavior **

**EPOV**

Have you every felt like, just jumping off a fucking cliff?

O.k., maybe that's too dramatic.

How about, crawling in a fucking cave and never coming out.

_Yeah, that sounds more like it. _

Well, that exactly how I felt seeing Tanya in my house, amongst my family and Bella.

I briefly looked behind me and saw Alice grinning at me like a fucking Cheshire cat.

_She's getting a kick out of this shit_

I glared at her and her grin grew impossibly wider. _Bitch_. This must be another one of her many tasks in Operation: Fuck this shit up for Edward. The, Bring the slutty psycho that Edward fucked to the house while Mom, Bella and her sons are present, mission. The main objective is to make Edward look like a prurient man-whore with extremely bad taste in women. Tanya maybe considered gorgeous by some but the chick is as dumb as a fucking door knob. I don't know how the hell she got into the university. It wouldn't surprise me if she fucked or sucked her way into it.

I was brought out of my thoughts by the sound of Alice's annoying laughter.

_Laugh now cry later you evil little pixie. Pay back's a bitch and I do plan on exacting my revenge. All I need is a little time and research. Then you will feel my fucking wrath._

"Oh Eddie, I missed you so much?" Tanya said, running her nails down my chest.

Oh yeah, how could I forget the bane of my existence was right fucking here; in my face, running her fucking red bird-like talons down my chest. I looked behind me only to find everyone including Seth and Collin looking at Tanya and I with interest. Alice and Rosalie were snickering amusingly and Bella…her expression was indifferent with a flicker of something else; I couldn't pin point it right now but it was oddly familiar. When she caught me staring she ducked her head and blush beet red. I internally smiled. I don't think I'll ever tire of her blushing; of seeing her skin turn that lovely pink or vibrant red. She looked so beautiful. Seeing her blush like that made we wonder if other parts of her body had that same effect. I can just imagine her whole body illuminating pink and red as I fervently worshiped it with my hands, thoroughly. I inaudibly groaned as I felt the bulge in my pants stiffen. I shifted my leg and a small gasped escaped from Tanya's mouth. Her red talons sunk deeper in my chest, grazing my nipples. I gripped her wrist and pulled her hands away from me in disgust. I found the bitch absolutely repulsive, now that I knew what true beauty and sexiness was, and Bella was the epitome of both.

"Aww, Eddie don't be like that. You know, seeing that rock hard cock of yours drives me fucking mad."

I heard something crash behind Tanya. I push her to the side and saw my mom standing mouth agape with an empty tray in her hands, and shards of broken glass and water at her feet.

Tanya gasped and put her hand over her mouth "Oh my god! I'm so sorry Mrs. Cullen but your son has like the best co…"

"Let's go Tanya!" I said as I dragged her out of the living room.

"Way to go Eddie! Don't do anything I wouldn't do!" Alice shouted as I slammed the living room door behind me.

When I reached the foyer I spun around and glared at her menacingly. She gazed at me heatedly, with nothing but pure lust and want in her eyes.

"What the fuck is your problem," I growled

"Oh, Yes Eddie let's fuck right here on the wall. I get so fucking hot when you look at me like that. Take me baby, I've been thinking about that cock for days now. I…Want…You."

"Are you fucking insane! I'm not going to fuck you. I don't even want you in my house," I snarled

She pouted "C'mon Eddie, don't be like that. I missed you baby and I can tell you missed me," She eyed my erection and licked her lips.

I chuckled humorlessly "Trust me Tanya, the day I miss you is the day I'll become the fucking pope."

She looked at me perplexed "But Eddie, you can never become a pope."

I rolled my eyes "Exactly dim-wit."

She huffed exasperatingly, and then a small smirk graced her lips.

"Well, if you don't miss me. How do you explain that," She said as she pointed to my hard on.

I looked down and groaned. I guess thinking about Bella's blush turned me on more than I thought. Just thinking about that rosy pink and red color traveling down her long neck and across her full heaving breast…_Fuck! _My erection throbbed in my pants and got impossibly harder. She looked at it and licked her lips again.

"What are you thinking about baby?" She said, trying to sound seductive.

"Not you," I snapped

Bella suddenly entered the room. She glanced at me then Tanya, who was currently ogling my cock. Then she quickly averted her eyes and her cheeks and neck flushed, lightly. My erection twitched in my pants. _Shit, this is getting uncomfortable._ Out of the corner of my eye I saw Tanya look up at me then she briefly gazed at Bella.

"I'm so sorry Edward, but Esme asked me to tell you to take this in the basement" She said, holding up a bag with broken glass.

Tanya glared at Bella, and then she gazed at me; smiling seductively.

"Do you mind if I joined you Eddie? I promise, I'll make it worth your while," She grazed my nipples with those fucking red talons again. I batted her hand away.

I turned my attention to Bella. She was staring at the floor, face flushed, looking extremely uncomfortable.

"Actually I do mind. Bella, do you mind walking with me?" I asked.

She looked up and stared at me wide eyed "Why…I mean…um…yeah, no… o.k." she stammered awkwardly. I smiled and couldn't help find her awkwardness very endearing.

Tanya stared daggers at Bella "O.k. Eddie, I'll be waiting up here for you, to finish what we started. You know I'm always ready for you baby."

"Tanya, if you really want to please me, get the fuck out. Get a life," I seethed.

This chick is seriously delusional. When I get angry and yell at her ass, she thinks its fucking foreplay. Unbelievable.

"You don't mean that baby. Plus, I don't think my new Bff Alice would appreciate you talking to her guest that way."

"Whatever Tanya," She scowled "Bella?" I gestured for her to follow me as I walked passed Tanya.

"Oh yeah, Bella is it? If you're looking for a second job I hear there's a new burger joint opening up in P.A. I hear they pay… minimum wage. Wouldn't that be like a really good opportunity for you," she smiled.

_This bitch is grating on my last nerves. _

"Tanya, Leave. Now!" I growled

"Alright Eddie, take a chill pill. I'm just trying to help the girl out. She is an unwed mother of two."

I turned toward Bella and she was staring unblinkingly at the wall.

"C'mon Bella. Let's go," I said, trying to gauge her expression. She blinked and looked at me, nodding her head.

She gazed at Tanya "Um…thanks for the info Tanya, but I'm quite fine working at Alice's store," she said lowly.

Tanya looked at Bella with a false expression of concern on her face.

"Are sure Bella? Because I hear it's hard to take care of children with an absent father. Especially if you don't have the skills and knowledge to obtain a job with a decent salary. You know, my mother's house keeper Joan is going through the same thing. She has seven kids, and three jobs to take care of all of them. I'll give her your number so you two can talk. Because I hear so many stories about, you know, young mother's prostituting to support their kids and stuff."

_How fucking dare that bitch. Who the fuck do she think she is, talking to Bella like that_.

I glared at her menacingly, letting all my rage and anger unravel. I'm going to give this bitch a piece of my mind. Nobody and I mean nobody talks to Bella that way, especially in my presence.

Just as I was about to open my mouth and lash out on that bitch, Bella responded by… laughing?

_O.k., now I'm fucking baffled. _

Her laughter was light and bell- like. I found myself smiling to the sound of it. It was music to my ears; I'd be perfectly content just hearing that sound for the rest of my life.

"Oh Tanya, You crack me up. I'm surprised you can articulate a whole paragraph without a cock in your mouth. You know, I heard you can speak more eloquently with a mouth full but I guess I heard wrong. Anyway, thanks but no thanks I'm doing just fucking fine… and oh, if I ever consider prostituting, which I never fucking would. I'll call you first and ask about it. I heard you're an expertise when it comes to that shit…or maybe not, since you do it for free. Later T," She smiled and walked through the side door on the opposite side of the room, which lead to the basement.

I stared at her retreating figure dumbfounded, with only one thought.

_That was fucking hot._

My erection throbbed and twitched painfully in my pants. _God, that was the hottest shit ever._ Who knew Bella had a feisty side to her. And who knew that I'd find it so fucking arousing. God, when she said 'fuck' and 'cock' I almost came in my pants. Damn that was hot.

I smirked and turned toward Tanya. She looked so pissed it was fucking laughable. I'd have to thank Bella later for putting her in her place. Maybe now she'll walk away and leave me the fuck alone…well at least that's what I'm hoping.

"You're fucking her aren't you?" she asked.

"What!"

"Eddie, don't fucking play dumb. I know you two are fucking. I see the way you look at each other," she said.

"Tanya, that's none of your fucking business. Remember, we are not together!" I growled.

"What about when we made love in…"

"We did not make love. I fucked you and it was a huge fucking mistake that I regret everyday. I regret even involving myself with you…get a fucking life Tanya. And leave me the fuck alone," I left her standing there and walked away from her. I opened the side door and walked downstairs to the basement.

When I entered the gloomy, cluttered basement I spotted Bella standing by the wall across from me with the bag of glass in her hands. Her expression was morose and her eyes were averted. I approached her, and held out my hand.

"Here, let me take that before you cut yourself."

She handed me the bag and looked up at me with sad eyes.

"I'm so sorry Edward. I didn't mean to disrespect your girlfriend like that."

"Bella, Tanya is not my girlfriend. Maybe she was several months ago but she's not now. She's delusional, the chick is insane. All I want is for her to leave me alone."

She gazed up at me and nodded her head "Yeah, but I shouldn't have talked to her like that."

"What! You have every right to defend yourself. Bella, Tanya's a bitch, trust me I know it."

She smiled softly "Yeah, I guess you're right. It felt amazing to lash out on her like that. It was very liberating."

I chuckled and raked my fingers through my hair, thinking about how sexy I found fiery Bella.

"Well, liberating wouldn't be my word choice of the verbal beating you gave her."

I had a few words to describe that particular event; hot, arousing, stimulating, mind-blowing, and smoking-hot

She arched an eyebrow "Oh really, what would be your word choice then?" she smirked, a fucking sexy smirk.

I raked my fingers through my hair again and berated myself for not keeping my thoughts to myself. _Damn, sometimes I need to learn to shut the fuck up._

"Um…I don't think you want to hear it."

She smiled and playfully shoved my shoulders "Yes I do, c'mon Edward what did you think when I let that cock sucking bitch, fucking have it."

_Oh, Fuck!_

Her words went straight to my cock. It twitched, jumped and throbbed in my pants painfully; begging to be let out and stroked, ASAP. I groaned embarrassingly. _Fuck! _I got to do something about this shit, now. My cock has been hard all day with no release. If I don't do something about this shit my dick is going to fucking explode.

Bella looked down at my pants. Her eyes widened as she saw my cock standing at attention; it jumped at her scrutiny. Her face turned fire engine red, if that's even possible. She quickly looked up at me and I gazed at her intensely.

_Well, she asked for it._

"It was fucking hot, Bella. I thought it was the hottest thing I've ever heard, and had the pleasure of witnessing in my life…and as you can see," I briefly looked down at my fully erected cock then back at her "…I'm not lying,"

She gulpedand murmured 'oh' before averting her eyes from mine.

"Now, let me take care of this problem," I held up the bag of glass "…so I could hurry up and take care of my other painful problem," she glanced down at my pants again and immediately averted her eyes.

Shit, that was kind of embarrassing, but I couldn't help but be satisfied by the way she kept glancing at my erection. I may come off sounding kind of cocky, but I know I'm very well endowed.

I walked to the back of the basement and placed the bag inside a large plastic recycling bin labeled 'glass'. Then I walked passed Bella, who was standing in the same spot; face flushed, panting. Her eyes were glazed over. She looked like she was on the verge of passing out. I slowly approached her and looked into her eyes.

"Bella, are you o.k.?"

Her chocolate eyes shifted to mine and what I seen in them made the air catch in my throat and sent my heart into an instant overload.

Pure unadulterated lust.

Her breathing sped up as she gazed at me, heatedly.

"Bella?"

Suddenly she gripped the collar of my shirt "I'm so sorry Edward," she tugged me down, and pressed her lips to mine.

When her lips touched mine sparks flew. I know that sounds really cliché but it's true. Sparks literally flew. The electric current intensified. It hummed from her lips to every cell in my body. I closed my eyes as the pleasure engulfed me. Every nerve ending, every organ even my blood boiled and was set aflame. God, the feeling was so amazing and surreal. I couldn't believe I was kissing her. I lightly gripped her waist and pulled her closer to me, so that her body touched mine. Once our bodies touch a whole new pleasure emerged as I felt my erection on her stomach. I moaned audibly and pulled back to catch my breath.

"Oh my god" I panted while gazing into her dark hooded eyes, that was burning with desire.

Her chest heaved and her beautiful face and neck was flushed pink.

"I know…that, this is wrong Edward," she panted.

I cupped her warm, flushed cheek and lightly grazed it with my thumb. She leaned into my touched and gazed at me intently.

"Well if this is wrong, then I don't want to be right," I ducked my head and kissed her again.

I closed my eyes and reveled in the feeling of her soft plump lips moving with mine. I opened my mouth a little and gently sucked on her plump bottom lip. She tasted so delicious. I wanted to taste more. My tongue swept across her bottom lip then between her lips; begging for entrance. She complied and opened her mouth. I eagerly thrusted my tongue in, moaning in satisfaction. She tasted exquisite; so sweet and heavenly. She moaned as I began massaging her tongue with mine, and the sound went straight to my cock. I groaned loudly. I wanted her, I wanted her badly and if we keep kissing like this I was sure I'd go against everything and take her.

I cupped her other cheek and reluctantly pulled away. Her eyes were still closed and her lips were swollen and red. She looked so fucking beautiful.

"Wow," she breathed

I slowly grazed her cheeks and her eyes fluttered, opened.

"My thoughts exactly," I murmured.

She smiled softly at me. Then suddenly her expression turned sorrowful and her eyes shifted from mine.

Oh my god, please don't tell me she regret the kiss. No! She can't regret anything that amazing.

I slightly shifted her head, to get her to look at me again. I needed her to look at me.

"Bella?" Her eyes locked with mine. Her expression was still sad.

"Edward…what are we doing?"

I thought about what she just asked and came up blank. _What are we doing?_

"I don't know…all I know is it feels…fucking amazing and wonderful…and I don't want it to end," I murmured, grazing her cheeks with my thumbs. She briefly closed her eyes and hummed in contentment.

When she opened her eyes, she gazed at me intensely "Me either,"

I smiled and lowered my head, kissing her again. I stroked her cheek and gripped her waist as I leisurely kissed her. I licked her bottom lip, begging for entrance and she opened her mouth engulfing my tongue. I groaned as my erection twitched on her stomach and she moaned when she felt it. Suddenly the kiss turned frantic. She ran her hands up my shoulders to the back of my neck, tangling her fingers through my hair and gripping it tightly. It felt so amazing and caused my erection to grow even more.

"Ahh…umm…oh god," I panted as I frantically moved my lips and tongue across her jaw and down her neck.

"Edward," she breathed "Edward, we really need to stop,"

I kissed and lightly nipped the soft skin across her collar bone. She tasted so fucking good and smelled so sweet. How many times I've imagine doing this very thing while I jerk off in the shower. God she was amazing. Her skin was like a drug that I am now, insanely addicted to. I never wanted to stop.

"No, I never want to stop," I murmured across her skin, causing her body to shiver slightly.

I smiled on her skin, loving the response of her body. I blew on the soft skin at the base of her neck and she shivered again, followed by a soft moan. Hmm…that seems to arouse her. I smiled again at the new found information that I planned on using, frequently.

"Mmm…Edward, neither do I. But we really need to go back upstairs before everyone gets suspicious," She turned her head as I kissed on her jugular.

She released my hair from her fingers and lightly cupped my face, lifting my head up. She gazed into my eyes intensely.

"So beautiful," she murmured before releasing my face and taking a step back. My arms dropped to my sides as I eyed her nervously.

_Was she having second thought?_

She turned around and faced the wall. I stood still, staring at her chestnut hair at the back of her head.

_What the hell is she thinking?_

The silence was fucking killing me. She hasn't spoken a word in three minutes but it felt like three hours or three days.

I raked my fingers through my hair "Bella…is…um…are you o.k.?"

"No one can know," she murmured

"What?"

Suddenly she turned around and faced me with a somber expression.

"No one can know, what going on between us" she said

O.k. now I'm confused. I could understand why we should keep this from Alice. But, everyone else? I don't get it.

I closed the distance between us and gripped her hand.

"I thought it was just Alice that we'd…"

"Edward, it's not just Alice. It's everyone, everyone in Forks. They can not know" she said, exasperatedly

"But Bella…"

She squeezed my hand "Please Edward. It'll just be too complicated…and I don't want this to end."

I squeezed her hand lightly and twined our fingers while gazing into her eyes.

"Whatever you want Bella…it yours. As long as you allow me to do this when we're alone, I'm happy" I squeezed our twined fingers to empasize my point.

She cupped my cheek in her warm hand "Edward, I've never felt…this passionate about a man before. It scares me"

I turned my head and kissed the palm of her hand.

"I've never felt this intense for a woman… and I'm fucking petrified"

She smiled softly. I kissed the palm of her hand again and smiled back at her. She removed her hands from my body and I immediately missed the warmth.

"Well, I guess we better head back up" she said, biting her swollen bottom lip.

I stared at her mouth in desire. Oh, god. Just seeing her do that, after I've finally had the pleasure of tasting those luscious lips made me want to grip her waist and attack her mouth again. I iternally groaned and my erection throbbed again. God, she has no idea what she does to me.

"Edward…are you o.k." she asked

My eyes shifted from her lips, back to her eyes "Uh, yeah. You're right; we really do need to head back. The evil pixie is on a rampage and I still have one more problem I have to take care of," I looked down at my erection then back up at Bella. Her eyes widened and her already pink flush turned scaret red. I throbbed and groaned at the sight of it.

"Shit…we really need to get the hell out of here, before I do something stupid," I groaned

She gulped and nodded her head as I tried to adjusted myself. Shit! I'm too fucking hard to hide this shit. I'll have to go straight to my room and handle this before I faced everyone.

"Ladies first," I said as we approached stairs, and then ascended it.

_Fuck! She has a great ass._

Bella giggled cutely as if she were reading my thoughts. She looked backed and caught me ogling her ass.

_Yep, she definitely knew I was checking out her ass._

Maybe she was a mind reader. I wouldn't put it passed her. She managed to turn my world upside down and change me in just a few days; and all she did was grace with her presense. That's got to be some kind of mind reading, hocus pocus shit.

It's like she bewitched me with her mind, body and soul.

I wanted it all.

And I couldn't be happier.

XXX

When we entered the foyer again, it was empty. _Thank god! _Bella headed back in the living and I ran upstairs to my room. I had a fucking raging hard on and if I kept leaving it unattended I was going to fucking combust. Once I entered my room I quickly stripped out of my clothes, ran in the bathroom and turned on the shower. _These things are best handle when wet_. When the water was warm enough I hopped in and let the tepid water relax my over excited body. My heart was still pounding and my body was buzzing from the kisses I shared with Bella. God, her lips were so soft and perfect; and her tongue was warm and sweet. I lowered my hand to my prominent erection and I began to slowly stroke it. I thought about her lips and tongue as I picked up the pace. Her blush and that sexy smirk, as I stroked a little faster. I moaned as my fingers grazed over the the head. _Fuck! _I started stroking frantically. My breathing sped up and came out in gasps as that pleasant pressure started to build. I thought about her moaning and saying the words; 'fuck', I groaned 'Suck', I moaned and 'cock'. My eyes rolled to the back of my head and I fucking exploded violently and floated straight to oblivion.

_Jesus Fucking Christ!_

When my breathing slowed down and my heart rate stabilized, I blinked and leaned against the the shower wall.

"What the fuck was that," I murmurmed to no one.

This woman can give me a mind-blowing orgasm without even touching me. Just thinking about her automatically sends my body haywire.

I grabbed my sponge and washed myself, all the while thinking…

_Bella Swan is going to be the death of me. _

XXX

I know I put this chapter up pretty quick, but just couldn't help it. I really wanted these two to get together already. Hope you like it and please, please, please review.

This story is still currently un-beta'ed (pout) but I'm trying my best so please bear with me.

Chapter 11- A disastrous dinner, Is up next. In Bella's Pov. It will be up in a couple of week.


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 11- A disastrous dinner**

**BPOV**

I took a deep breath; casually strolled in the living room and took a seat next to Alice on the sofa. Her and Rosalie were having a discussion about our up-coming trip to the club in Port Angeles. They were talking about dresses and shoes so I automatically tuned them out. I had bigger things to worry about. Like; what the hell was I thinking kissing Edward? And how the hell I'm going to hide it from every one?

Alice, just noticing me, turned and gaze at me suspiciously.

Shit, if anybody was capable of finding out; it would be Alice. I swear she has like a six sense about these things.

"Where the hell have you've been? You were gone for twenty minutes," Alice asked.

Twenty minutes_. Shit_. There's no way I'm getting away with this.

"Umm…bathroom" I replied, shortly.

"Hmm" she said. She gave me a final look then turned back to Rosalie and resumed their conversation. I sighed in relief.

_Shit, that was a close one. _

I thought I was busted for sure; I was a horrible liar. Renee always called me an opened book. She said, just by taking one look at me you'd immediately see whatever I'm feeling; in this case I was feeling fucking nervous. My palms were literally sweaty and if I bit my lip any harder the shit was going to fall off.

Oh my god. What the hell was wrong with me? I can't believe I kissed him. I mean, I never intended for it to happen. It just happened. I've never been that reckless, impulsive and lust-driven in my life

But I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy every minute of it.

All I know is when that Tanya bitch sauntered in here, bragging about how great her relationship is with Edward; something in me snapped. I was insane with jealously and irrational hate. I hated her beauty, I hated her confidence and most of all; I hated her because she reminded me of Lauren. She was a stuck-up slut just like Lauren and I hated her. Alice wasn't too fond of her either. She told me she met her once at a party and she was acting like a drunken slut the whole time; which didn't surprise me. What surprised me is that Edward was dating her. I couldn't believe it. He's an intelligent decent guy. Why the hell would he date trash like Tanya?

_Was he that shallow? _

When he came downstairs after our almost- kiss Tanya approached him from behind. I almost laughed out loud at how pissed he look when he turned around. It was apparent that all wasn't well in paradise. The look in Edward's eyes said it all. _He did not want her there. _I subtly observed them with interest. He was a couple of inches taller than her and they were both insanely beautiful. Her strawberry blond hair flowed down her back like a sea of shimmering soft curls; while his equally beautiful bronze locks was style in that perfect disarray that always drove me mad. What I realized although I hated to admit it was that they actually looked… good together. They complemented each other perfectly; like a celebrity couple or something.

She ran her fingers down his chest, causing me to burn with jealousy. She didn't deserve to touch him; she was a dirty whore.

And I wondered if he knew?

He probably did because the girl had slut written all over her. From her low neck belly shirt to her low rise jeans that showed a peep of her pink g-string_. _He seemed oblivious of her actions, which I found kind of strange. I mean she was a gorgeous woman. Why wasn't he gawking at her? He gazed at me briefly which caused me to blush in embarrassment and quickly look down. When I looked back up I internally cheered when I noticed her hands were off him. Then Esme suddenly dropped some glass, which must have pissed Edward off even more because he shouted at Tanya and pulled her out of the room; but not before Alice shouted 'Way to go Eddie. Don't do anything I wouldn't do'. Which cause my jealously to flare up again.

_Did she really approve of them as a couple_?

After that, I abruptly stood up and helped Esme clean up the glass. She thanked me and murmured something about indecent young ladies with dirty mouths. Although, young lady wouldn't be the term I'd use for Tanya. I think young skank would be more fitting. When we finished picking up the glass she placed it in a bag and asked me to give it to Edward, so he can take it to the basement. I told her I didn't want to interrupt his time with his girlfriend. She solemnly gazed at me and whispered 'Please save him Bella'. I was taken aback by her request and something told me that she was not only talking about Tanya. When I left the living room, I found Edward and Tanya in the foyer having a heated discussion. I blushed and averted my eyes when I noticed her blatantly staring at his crotch. It didn't look like he needed to be saved. It looked like I was interrupting. The evil glare she gave me confirmed my thoughts_, I wasn't wanted there._ I was ready to give him the bag and get the hell out of dodge until he surprised me and asked me to join him. That must have really pissed Tanya off because she started making sarcasticremarks about me being an unwed single parent. This sent my ego down into a fiery pit. I knew who I was but hearing it out loud from another person's perspective made me feel like even more of a loser. I was standing there looking down on Tanya because of her promiscuity when I'm the one with two children, living with my dad and working in a clothing store. No offense to Alice; I love working with her but let's face it that job was better suited for the young and child-less. I had two children to support and I really didn't want to lean on Charlie for any extra money.

Tanya was a young coed with her whole life ahead of her. She didn't have to worry about those things. Who was I to judge her and think she's not right for Edward - when in reality I wasn't right for him. A woman like me would only bring him down and ruin his life.

I was ready to bolt out of there with my tail between my legs until she said something about prostituting. And that's when the cord broke and I really fucking snapped; because you can say anything about me but insinuating that I should prostitute to support my children, that's where I drew the line. I started hysterically laughing at the bitch; because she was a fucking joke. How dare she say that shit to me when she's the one who probably fucked half of Seattle. I laughed so hard my eyes closed and watered. When I opened my eyes, I didn't see Tanya anymore…I saw Lauren. I saw the bitch that was my co- worker for three years, the bitch that I caught in my bed on more than one occasion and the bitch whose child will share the same father as my boys. I had so much pent up anger and frustration inside me that I thought I would burst; so I slowly let it unravel but not too much because that would have resulted in Tanya, unconscious due severe head trauma and I didn't think Dr. Cullen and Esme would of been too happy - not to mention Charlie.

After I handed that bitch her ass I sauntered downstairs to the basement feeling like a huge weight was lifted off my chest, I felt great. But once I got down there, what I actually did began to sink in_. I insulted Edward's girlfriend_. Although, they obviously had problems; that still didn't give me the right to talk to her like that in front of him. I felt horrible. When he entered the basement I immediately apologized to him but he brushed it off by telling me she deserved it and that she was not his girlfriend. My heart fluttered at that news. But then he shocked me by telling me that he actually enjoyed me lashing out on Tanya - I mean he really enjoyed it. The proof was standing proudly in his pants.

And I've never been so turned on in my life.

I mean, the look in his eyes when he said he thought it was 'the hottest thing ever' was my undoing. My heart rate and breathing increased from a mixture of lust and anxiety. He was so goddamn sexy and irresistible.

My eyes flickered to lips and that's when I knew what I wanted to do; what I had to do.

I was tired of fighting it.

So when he approached me again. I didn't think. I just grabbed him by the collar and kissed him with everything I had. And god what a kiss it was. My whole body tingled as his lips moved with mine. I never felt anything like it. I let the overwhelming feeling take over my body with only one word running through my mind…

_More _

I wanted more of him. I needed more. But, having more of him would not be good for him.

_I wasn't good for him_

The rational side of my brain said I had to stop. But my over heated body said hell no_._

And who do you think won that battle?

My body, of course.

Plus, Edward was making it so difficult with his scent, his mouth and his sexy words_. _So as selfish as it was I decided to continue whatever It was I had with Edward under the agreement that no can find out; because if the Cullen's find out they'll hate me for sure. I mean, who wants their over-achieving son with a woman who will only ruin him.

No one.

So here I sit, a nervous wreak wondering…_ What the hell have I gotten myself into? _

"…right Bella?" Alice asked pulling me out of my musings.

_Oh, shit. When the hell did they included me in their conversation?_

Alice and Rosalie stared at me expectantly; waiting for my response.

"Um…yeah," I said, completely clueless.

Alice gaped at me incredulously and Rosalie clapped her hands.

"Excellent, I'll have him call you tomorrow. This is so great!" Rosalie squealed

Him? Oh god, what the hell did I just agree to?

"Rosalie, who's going to call me tomorrow," I asked, nervously

"Alec" Rosalie said "…and don't worry Bella, he'll be a perfect gentleman but if he's not I'll kick him in the fucking balls"

I gaped at her_. What. The. Hell? _

Alice squealed "You are going to look so hot Friday, Bella. I have the perfect dress for you,"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Who the hell is Alec?" I asked

"Alec is the guy Rosalie just set you up with. Were you listening to a thing we said?" Alice replied.

She was setting me up with a guy? And I agreed to it like a dumb ass?

Oh no, no, no

Just as I was about to respond with a _hell no_; Edward suddenly appeared in the doorway. His hair was wet and he was clad in a plain white tee, blue jeans and his feet were bare .I was thankful that Alice and Rosalie diverted their attention from me because I couldn't seem to take my eyes away from him. He looked absolutely delicious and his intoxicating scent assaulted my senses. His eyes bore into mine and he smirked. My cheeks reddened and I bit my lip to hide the smile on face. Just looking at that smirk made my think about how warm and soft his lips felt on mine; and I longed to feel them again.

He ran his fingers through his sexy hair and I briefly fantasized about doing that myself. Then my smile suddenly turned into a frown when I spotted Tanya behind him.

She placed her hand on his arm possessively and he tensed. He immediately snatched her hand off of him and glared at her.

"Tanya, do not touch me," he seethed. Alice and Rosalie, just noticing their presence, looked toward them with interest.

"Did you two have fun upstairs? You were gone an awfully long time" Alice said, wagging her eye brows.

"Alice" Edward growled in warning.

"Don't worry Eddie. You're secret is safe with us" Rose chortled

What! They were upstairs together?

I suddenly felt a sharp sting in my chest. Like a knife digging a hole in my heart _what was that? _The feeling was so intense that I just wanted to get the hell out of here, climb in my bed and cry my eyes out. It was annoying and I couldn't seem to shake it. I remember feeling the same way every time I caught Lauran in my bed, every time I received a phone call from one of Jake's many women and when I found out Lauran was pregnant.

I was hurt.

Edward gazed at me. His eyes bore into mine; silently pleading. But his pleading was futile because he was upstairs for a while and when he came back downstairs his hair was wet and he was dressed in different clothing; and to top it off Tanya was right behind him. I shrugged my shoulders and gave him what I thought was a reassuring smile. He didn't owe my anything. We weren't anything. We just made out for a couple of minutes and got a little caught up; that's all. And I'm the one who attacked him. I kissed him first.

_But he said he didn't want anything to do with her?_

Yeah…but maybe they had some strange kind of love/hate relationship.

_But why did he kiss me back when he had someone like Tanya?_

Now, that fucking baffled me. Why did he kiss me back?

Maybe he just… he just…

_Used me _

Oh god he used me… used me like he did those other women. I couldn't be mad at anyone but myself. This was all my fault. Alice warned me; she told me how he was with women and I didn't listen to her. I listened to my own lust-driven body like some floozy. Like Tanya

I felt the familiar prickling sensation in my eyes; preparing me for the imminent tears.

_Shit, I had to get the hell out of here. _

Just then Seth and Collin came barreling into the room. I immediately smiled at them. _My boys _They ran into my arms and jumped on my lap. I tickled their tummies which cause them to burst with giggles; and just like that my previous melancholic mood was lifted. My boys always lifted my spirits; because when their happy I'm happy.

"Mommy…Mommy…stop it please" Collin said between giggles, squirming in my arms.

"Please… Mommy," Seth giggled "My… tummy…hurts,"

I laughed wholeheartedly "Alright, but Tommy the tickling troll will be back"

"No!" they both shouted in unison "Not Tommy, tickle troll!"

They leaped off my lap and ran. I ignored everyone else in the room; only focusing my two life lines, my boys. I chased them, clawing my hands; growling. They loved when I played Tommy the tickling troll with them. It's something I've been doing with them since they were babies. Jake always hated it. He said it was stupid and annoying; so I started only doing it whenever he wasn't home. It was our thing; me and my boys. And they love it so I loved doing it.

They ran to the doorway and hid behind Edward's legs_. Shit_

"Save us Edwood. Save us" Collin giggled, grabbing Edward's leg

I made the mistake of looking at him, only to find him staring at me intensely with that same pleading look. I quickly averted my eyes and turned my attention back to my boys. _I would not let him get to me._

"C'mon boys. Let's wash up for dinner" I said as I grabbed them. I walked passed Tanya, who was still standing next to Edward with a satisfied smirk on her face, and headed to the bathroom.

I entered the bathroom and quickly washed the boys hand's and mine. I splashed some cold water on my face and gave myself a brief pep talk. _Alright, you could do this Bella just get through this meal without the tears and self loathing. Do not under any circumstances look at Edward; and please, please, please ignore anything that whore has to say. _I looked at myself in the mirrorand frowned. My hair was a mess. I dug into my pocket and pulled out my hair tie. I pulled my hair up into a pony tail and we walked out the bathroom. When we walked in the hall, Esme was there. She said that everyone was in the dining room. So the boys and I followed her in. When we entered the dining room, Esme went into the Kitchen and the boy and I took our seats next to Alice and across from…Edward and Tanya._ Alright calm down, Bella. Just don't look at them. _

Everyone was engrossed in conversation as I sat there absentmindedly twirling my fingers around my hair. I felt awkward and exposed; especially with Edward staring at me from across the table.

_Oh Please Esme, hurry up with the food so I could get the hell out of here. _

"So Bella, are you still freaked out about the whole Alec thing?" Alice said, looking apologetic "because if you are…I'm sorry I pushed"

Shit, Alec. Guy your two meddling friends set you up with.

"Um…"

How the hell do I respond to that? Normally I would say 'yes you freaked me the fuck out and I'm not interested' but something was telling me not to. Something inside was telling me to go out with this guy, try to have a good time and forget about Edward.

YES! Forget about Edward

And suddenly I had an epiphany.

I need to get over Edward

I looked at Alice and smiled "No, I'm not freaked out. I'm…ecstatic. Tell him to call me so we could set something up. I'd love to meet him"

Alice smiled happily at me and I heard the distinct sound of a utensil being dropped on a dish across from me. I instinctively turned toward the sound and was met with a pair piercing emerald's staring at me looking…hurt. I immediately looked away.

_Well welcome to the club. You hurt me too _

"Wow, this is so great. Alec and Demetri are actually coming to the club with us" Alice said

"Demetri?" I asked, grinning at Alice

I guess she got over her so-call love affair with cyber man

"Demetri is actually my guy" Rosalie said "well…at the moment he is"

"Why doesn't that surprise me" Edward muttered.

Rosalie glared at him and he ran his fingers though his hair and muttered 'fuck'. He obviously didn't intend for anyone to hear him.

"Says the womanizing man-whore. No disrespect cousin" Rosalie snapped

Tanya smiled and looked adoringly at Edward "Non- taken. Me and Eddie have a very open relationship. I don't worry about all those other bitches. He always comes back to me"

She stared at me intently and I had no doubt those words were directed at me.

Edward's face turn two shades of red "Will you cut the bullshit Tanya? We are not in a relationship. We are not together!"

"Edward, Language! There are children present" Esme scolded as she entered the kitchen, carrying a large platter.

"I apologize, Mom" then he gazed at me "I apologize Bella"

His eyes bore into mine, like he was silently trying to tell me something. I half smiled and quickly looked away.

Esme went back into the kitchen to get the rest of the meal. Carlisle suddenly entered the dining room, clad in a pair of slacks and a grey button shirt. He looked at the addition guest and smiled. I watched Edward's expression immediately turn into a scowl at his father's arrival.

"It looks like we have two extra faces at our table this evening" he smiled, an attractive Edward-like crooked smile.

Now I know who Edward get's his smile from.

Rosalie and Tanya swooned at his charm and Alice rolled her eyes. I sat there nervously, hoping like hell he doesn't bring up anything about my panic attack while Tanya and Rosalie were present. I didn't need two more people thinking that I was crazy.

"Good evening doctor Cullen" Rosalie smiled, flirtatiously.

Carlisle took his seat at the head of the table while Rosalie and Tanya watched his every move.

Oh my god. Could they be anymore obvious? And where's Esme? I don't think she'd be too pleased with two women drooling over her husband.

"Now Rosalie, I've told you countless time to address me as Mr. Cullen or Carlisle. Whatever works for you" he winked

Oh, my god. He's totally flirting with her.

Rosalie giggled like a school girl causing to Carlisle chuckled. Alice squinted her eyes at them and made a gagging sound.

_Was this something they normally did?_

"Hello Mr. - Dr. Cullen. I'm Tanya Denali, Edward's girl" Tanya smiled

_Mr. / Dr? What a fucking airhead. _

Then I heard the distinct sound of silver ware dropping on a plate again. I glanced at Edward and see him staring daggers at Tanya.

"You are not my fucking girl," he growled

The whole table went silent. Tanya's eyes began to water and she ducked her head, sniffling.

Oh, pu-leeze. I had seen better acting from a chimp. Rosalie and Alice even rolled their eyes at her dramatics.

Carlisle's ice blue eyes glared at Edward. "Edward, that was inexcusable. I thought I taught you better than that. Now you will apologize to Ms. Denali," he scolded

Edward abruptly stood, causing the chair to fall behind him. He glared at Carlisle and I audibly gulped when I saw the look in his eyes. I knew shit was about to hit the fan.

"Taught me better than that? The only thing you taught me is how to be a cold heartless asshole" he seethed.

Carlisle stood up "Edward, I will not allow you to disrespect me in my house. Now apologize to me and Ms. Denali or get the hell out you ungrateful bastard!"

Edward flinched at his words, as if someone struck him. The look in his eyes changed from one of pure rage to one of pain. His expression broke my heart. He looked like a little boy whose just been told that his father hated him.

What the hell is going on?

I looked to my sons and they too share my look of confusion; every one else looked at Edward with nothing but pure sympathy. Even Alice looked like she wanted to shed a tear for her brother.

Esme ran out the kitchen holding a spatula, looking frazzled with blood red eyes.

"Edward"

He held up his hand, immediately halting her movements.

"I'm fucking out of here" he turned and walked out of the dining room.

"No, Edward" Esme said following behind him, leaving the dining room. But we still heard their conversation clearly

"No, mom. Go back and have dinner with your family and friends. I'm the one that doesn't belong.

"But you're my son. Of course you belong, darling," she sobbed

"But I'm not his. And he made it perfectly clear that he doesn't want me here. So…I'm driving back to Seattle tonight"

"Will you be coming back?" she asked, desperately

There was a long pause as she waited for his answer. I found myself biting my nails as I waited, thinking.

What if I never see him again?

I tried to ignore the jolt of pain I felt as I thought about not seeing Edward again; but it was impossible. Something deep inside me secretly longed for Edward's smiles, his laugh, and his voice. I had to see him again. This couldn't be the last time.

"Uh…I don't know mom…I'll call you" he replied.

"Good-bye, darling" Esme said. Then we heard the distinct sound of the front door opening and slamming close.

He was gone.

Esme's sobs filled the room. Carlisle excused his self and walked out to tend to his wife, while the rest of us sat there in an awkward silence. Collin tugged on my shirt and I gazed at him.

"Mommy is Edwood coming back?" he asked

"I don't know, honey. I don't know"

XXX

Review


	12. Author's note

This is just a little note to say thank you all for reading Falling Effortlessly, I really appreciate it. I have a new story up called Rediscovering the swan, I would really love it if you guy read and review it. I'll be updating in a few weeks so….

_**Happy Holidays to all!**_


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 12- Bonding with Big bear**

**EPOV**

The door slammed with an audible thud as I stormed out of the house. I hopped in my car and sped off. I turned the radio on to the classical station, hoping that it would calm me; but it was futile. I was too fucking riled up.

I made a right and got on the main road, when I suddenly realized something. How the fuck was I suppose to go to Seattle without clothes and the keys to my dorm?

Fuck, Fuck, Fuck

I slammed my hand on the steering wheel in frustration. I left all my shit back at the house. _His House_

Now, I had absolutely nowhere to go.

I'm such a fucking idiot.

But I knew one thing for sure. I wasn't fucking going back there_… To His House_

I drove around aimlessly for a couple of hours. Heavy rain began to pelt against my windshield and the thick cloud cover darkened the sky. I heard the distant rumblings of the thunder and knew a storm wasn't too far behind. Although this was the norm in Fork; I found it kind of ironic that this day matched my mood perfectly. The rain and clouds reflect my melancholy and I the thunder reflect my anger

'…_get the hell out you ungrateful bastard!' _

That was the first time he ever voiced how he felt about me. Actually said it. I've grown so accustomed to his indifference, that I never thought that he would actually say anything like that to me.

And it hurt like a bitch

All I ever wanted, my whole life was to be accepted by Carlisle. Piano lessons, Little League, my academic excellence; hell - even going to Medical school. Those all were things I excelled in or did because I wanted to be good enough for him. In hopes; that maybe one day he could love and accept me. Because despite how he's treated me; I've always looked up to Carlisle. He was the man I always…wanted to be.

And what did he do?

Gave me his ass to kiss countless times; by missing recitals, never coming to games, over-looking any accomplishment or awards I received.

He made me feel insignificant.

And I guess; in his eyes, I was.

I wasn't his real son, so why should he give a fuck about me. Emmett was his pride and joy. Alice was his princess. Me…I was a nuisance to him, a mistake. I was the result of his wife's infidelity with an unknown man.

_The unknown Man _

When I was younger I use to wonder about my real father. Like, what he was like? And how did he look?

All mom told me was that he was a struggling musician at a night club, in Chicago; and that he died in a fire. When I would ask her for additional information she would just brush it off and say 'It doesn't matter, Carlisle is your father.'

Now that I'm older; I'm really fucking curious about this man. I want to know how they met. Did he have any relatives? And what kind of instrument he played?

Even though he was dead; I wanted to feel some kind of connection to him. A connection I so desperately wanted with Carlisle, but never got. It made me feel so empty, like something was missing. Maybe finding out about this mystery man; my real father, will help fill that void.

I was pulled out of my musings by my phone vibrating, in my pocket. _I swear to god if it's Mom or Alice, I'm not picking up._ I dug in my pocket and pulled it out, reading the name on the screen with irritation

_Emmett _

What the hell does he want?

_Wasn't he supposed to be in Maui with his latest bimbo?_

Emmett and I had a fairly good relationship. His humor and overly-enthusiastic attitude has cheered me up countless times. He understood me and always forgave me when I irrationally lashed out on him. People always thought of him as a huge, intimidating mother-fucker but in reality he was all heart.

Any other time I'd be more than happy to accept his call; but today… I simply wasn't in the mood.

I ignored the call and tossed the phone in the glove compartment.

I made a right and jumped on the freeway, heading toward Port Angeles. _Where the fuck am I going?_

My phone vibrated again. I took it out and glanced at the name.

_Emmett_…again

I groaned, loudly. If I ignore the call again, he'll just keep on calling. Emmett was a persistent fucker.

I pulled over on the shoulder of the road and flipped the phone open.

"Edward! What's up baby bro?" he said, loudly.

"Emmett, I don't have time for this. What the fuck do you want?" I retorted

"Alright man, take a chill pill sheesh. Mom called me"

I groaned, pinching the bridge of my nose. I didn't want to get into this shit right now. But I knew his persistent ass won't give up until I tell him something. Sighing in defeat, I rolled the window down and lit a cigarette. I took a deep drag and exhaled slowly.

"Did she now?"

"Don't play stupid Ed. Where the fuck are you? She's worried sick,"

"Well, I was on my way to Seattle until I realized I left my keys and shit back at the house. Now…well now, I'm just driving around in the fucking rain, enjoying the scenery" I took another drag of cigarette.

"Edward, take your ass back home. Mom's fucking hysterical. She couldn't even talk to me on the phone. I had to speak to Alice"

"Alice" I chuckled humorlessly "You know, this is all her fucking fault. If she didn't invite Tanya and Rosalie over, this wouldn't have fucking happened" I threw my cigarette out of the window and rolled it back up.

"Ah…Rosalie. The beautiful, bodacious, busty blond" he gushed "Is she available?"

"Emmett" I raked my hand through my hair in frustration.

"Alright, Alright. So…what does Alice have to do with this shit?" he asked "And who the hell is Tanya?"

"Everything" I snapped "She invited my ex, Tanya, to dinner. Because she was mad I was interested in her friend Bella," I explained.

"Tanya and Bella. Damn bro, they sound hot. Are they available?" he asked

"Emmett, this isn't fucking funny!"

"Alright bro, here's what you do. Just blow off some steam, then…"

"I'm not fucking going back there. Carlisle has made it crystal fucking clear that he doesn't want me there" I retorted

"O.k., o.k. So just get a room for the night and I'll see you tomorrow"

"You're, here?" I asked, perplexed

"I will be tomorrow," he replied "So make sure you line all the babe's up. Because big bear's on his way," he said, humorously. I rolled my eyes.

_Big bear _That's such a douchey name. His fans named him that after he tackled the shit out of some guy from the Cowboy's. They said when he rammed the guy he looked like a big bear. The media loved it. So now he's known as Emmett 'big bear' Cullen.

"Alright Emm" I sighed "I'll…uh, call you when I get a room"

"Alright, Ed. See ya"

I ended the call and resumed driving toward Port Angeles. I'll book a room at the nearest motel, hit up a local bar and call it a night. I needed to forget the last two to three hours and getting shit-faced was my only option. I just hope this decision doesn't end up biting me in the ass.

XXX

_Thump Thump Thump_

I jumped out bed, startled. Nearly tripping over my clothes; which were laying haphazardly on the floor. My body felt weak and I had a headache the size of fucking Texas.

_Thump Thump Thump_

I jumped again. _What the fuck was that? _

I turned in the direction of the noise, flummoxed by my surroundings.

_Where the hell am I?_

I was obviously in a room. A small, plain room - which contained; beige walls, beige carpet, a wooden nightstand with a lamp on it, and a large bed with white sheets.

I closed my eyes and massaged my temples. My head hurt like a bitch. I thought back to last night's events, hoping to gain some kind of clarity.

I remember the bullshit at the house with Carlisle, driving off in the rain, talking to Emmett on the phone, getting a room at a motel then hitting up a bar. My eyes shot opened.

Oh shit, I'm at motel in Port Angeles.

_Thump Thump Thump_

"C'mon Ed-man. Open up the fucking door!" Emmett bellowed

My head throbbed painfully at the noise. I winced - closing my eyes until the pain subsided.

_Thump Thump Thump_

I groaned in irritation as I shuffled to the door. I pulled it opened, glaring menacingly at the big jackass. He was all smiles with a baseball cap on; wearing a grey sweat suit, with the hood on that had a picture of a grizzly bear on it. I rolled my eyes at his obsession with fucking bears and he pulled me into a bone crushing hug.

"Aww… Ed-man. I missed you little bro"

"Emmett I can't fucking breathe" I muffled in his chest

He put me in a head lock and gave me a noogie. I thrashed and twisted out of his grasp, panting. I ran my hand through my hair, thoroughly pissed.

"What the fuck Emm?" I panted

He smiled "C'mon, little bro. Big bear just wanted to show you a little love" he flexed his muscles "…and see what your candy ass is working with, and I have to say I'm impressed. I remember a time when you weren't able to get out of my deadly bear hold"

_Again with the bear shit _

I walked back to the bed and sat on the edge. I bent my head between my legs and closed my eyes. Carlisle used to do this whenever he had hangovers, which were quite frequently. It was supposed to dull the pain or some shit.

"Shit, it smells like cigarettes and cheap beer in here" he stated "Did you bring the fucking bar up here?"

"Thanks for noticing captain obvious" I murmured.

Suddenly I felt the bed dip, beside me. Emmett placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. I lifted my head and gazed at him.

"You look like shit" he said, looking at me worried "What's going on, Ed?"

I sighed and stood "Well, for starters my fucking head feels like a dozen jackhammer's are going off in my brain" I grabbed my jeans from the floor a pulled out my pack of cigarettes and lighter. I took one out and lit it, taking a deep drag. "Then there's our meddling, pixie sister and all her fuckery; and last but not least there's Carlisle fucking Cullen. The condescending dickhead - also known as our dad" His eyebrow's furrowed in displeasure.

"What did he do this time?

That's why I loved Emmett. He was the only one who wasn't afraid admit how much of an ass Carlisle was. He knew Carlisle's attitude toward me was unfair, and he wasn't afraid to voice how he felt. Which often resulted in him getting grounded - but he always took his punishments in stride. Because in his eyes he was being loyal to his brother and Emmett was very big on loyalty.

"Do you want the short version or the long one?" I asked. I took another drag and leaned against the wall.

"Tell me everything" he replied, solemnly

So I told him everything. I told him about my situation with Tanya, my feelings for Bella - I also told him about Alice and all her fuckery. I didn't have to tell him about my situation with Carlisle; because he knew all to well about that. But I did tell him about my plans to find out about my real father. He seemed very supportive of that and even offered to help me out. But when he asked me for his name, I was completely dumbstruck.

_Shit, I didn't even know his name_

Now that I think about it. It seems that Mom had intentionally left out that bit of important information. But, what I'm curious to know is…why? Why would she tell me; where the guy was from, what he did for a living, and how he met his demise. But leave out his name. That shit confused me and I had to admit it pique my interest. The next time I see her, I resolved to ask her about that.

After I told Emmett about everything that's happened, I got dressed and we went out to get some breakfast. We ate at a local diner. While there, he told me about what he's been up to. He told me that the whole vacation in Maui thing was only a ruse that his publicist told the media, to keep the Paps off his back. He said that he had a very strenuous season and was in desperate need of some down time away from the public eye. He told his housekeeper to stock up his kitchen with food, and stayed at his condo in Seattle the whole time. When I asked him why he told us - his family the same lie. His response was simple

Alice.

He didn't even have to elaborate because I knew first hand how Alice was. She was like the Paps, the news and the fashion police all wrapped in one tiny ass package. If she caught wind that Emmett was in Seattle the whole time, it would be only a matter of time before the whole world found out.

When we finished breakfast we hit up a local tavern. Apparently it was the same place I got shit-faced in the previous night; judging by the way the bartender kept eyeing me and asking 'Did you work things out with Bellma' I shrugged my shoulders and took a sip of beer, in response. For a while, we drank our beers in a comfortable silence. But after the third beer; Emmett gazed at me with a look of determination

"So… what are you going to do about the situation, with this Bella chick?" he asked.

I sighed, starting to feel the effects of the alcohol and took a sip of my beer.

"Nothing" I averted my eyes, focusing on the drunken patrons across from us, but I could still feel his eyes on me

"What do you mean nothing? You're obviously nuts about her"

I raked my fingers through my hair and gazed at him.

"Just leave it alone Emm"

"So, you're just going to give up?" he asked, incredulously "…let Alice win" he shook his head and took a sip of his beer.

"Emmett, this isn't about winning or losing. This is about her, what she wants" my voice lowered "…and she obviously doesn't want me." I turned my head and took a sip of my beer.

_She didn't want me_

My heart ached, just thinking about it. Of course she didn't want me. Alice and Tanya probably filled her head up with all types of shit I did in my past, and even though I know I'm not that person anymore. Bella didn't. Hell, she didn't even know me. But the whole Tanya situation fucked up any chance we had to really get to know each other. Now she wants nothing to do with me and she's going out with some douche on Friday.

_I'm so fucked_

I gazed back at Emmett with an impassive expression. I didn't want him to see the pain I so obviously felt. But, he did. Emmett always saw right through me, so he knew I was full of shit. I tipped my bottle back, taking a huge gulp of beer. Then I put it back down on the table a little too harsh; suddenly feeling light-headed and really warm. Despite my fucked mood, I began to feel pretty great. That's when I knew without a doubt I was buzzed.

"Your alright there, E?" I nodded with a smile.

"You know, maybe this was for the best." I chuckled humorlessly "I'm a fuck up. My father despises me, my sister can't stand me and my brother and mother pity me. Bella shouldn't be with someone like that" I took a small sip of beer "Not to mention all the chicks I fucked"

I picked up the bottle again, but Emmett immediately snatched it out of my hand.

"I think you had enough, E" he said, placing a wad of cash on the table "let's get the hell out of here"

"Where are we going? I stood up and stretched "Back to the motel?"

"Yeah, that's our first stop. You need to get your shit and sober up"

He stood up and waved someone over. A second later, a cute little blond approached us. She picked up the money and walked away; but not before winking at us, suggestively. Emmett got an eye full of her ass, grinning like a kid in a candy store. I rolled my eyes, annoyed. Now the old Edward would have sauntered up to her and invited her to his room. But the new me wasn't interested.

"Nice" he appraised, still watching the woman's ass "What do you think Ed?"

Before I could stop them, the words were already out of my mouth

"Bella's ass looks way better" I smacked my forehead, mortified.

_I can not believe I just said that_

He gaped "Oh shit" then he chuckled, shaking his head "Damn man, you got it bad"

I rolled my eyes "Whatever man" I ran my fingers through my hair "Now will you tell me, where the fuck we're going after the motel?"

"My place" he said "You're staying with me bro"

XXX

Emmett's condo was the ultimate bachelor's pad. The first thing I noticed was the huge - wall sized window, which had an amazing view of the city. The living room was white - decked out with a red sectional, a white plush rug, 60' flat screen and every game system known to man. Beautiful paintings adjoined the walls and a glass cabinet, housed his awards and memorabilia. A wide smile made its way on my face when I realized who was responsible for the appearance of his condo.

_Mom_

I chuckled, calling him out on it. He crossed his arms defensively and said she would have killed him if he'd let someone else do it. I rolled my eyes and called him a pansy under my breath. He gave me a tour of the rest of the condo - which included a small bar area, kitchenette and two bedrooms upstairs. The rooms were also decked out. His, being the largest was really extravagant. It honestly looked like a swanky bear's den. Everything was brown, tan, and black. I knew, without a doubt mom had nothing to do with his room. That was all him, trying to live up to that _Big bear _shit.

After the tour, we ordered some take-out and spent the evening reconnecting and playing video games. I called mom to let her know I was fine and that I would see her, before I headed back to campus - in a few days. I didn't tell her I was at Emmett's; he said he wasn't ready for the world to know he was in the city. His exact words were 'Big bear is hibernating now and he does not want to be disturbed and there's nothing more dangerous than an irritable bear.'

_I'm really starting to hate bears_

I went to bed fairly early. I was feeling morose and wanted time to myself, to think about a few things. Emmett didn't seem to mind. He knew how I was. He knew, once I got into a crappy mood - I needed to be alone or in his words 'I needed time to brood'

I flopped in the bed, stared at the ceiling and thought of nothing but Bella.

I wonder what she was doing. I wonder what her boys were doing.

_Her boys_

I know they definitely hated me. I promised them we'd watch that movie and I'm not even fucking there. Everyone knows that kids are really sensitive about shit like that. You don't make promises to them that you don't intend to keep. I'll have to make it up to them some how. But how can I do that when their mother wants nothing to do with me?

My mind flitted back to the way she looked at me, when Alice said that Tanya and I were upstairs together. She looked so hurt and betrayed and… resigned. She believed that shit. She really believed that I would do something so heartless and cold to her. Like I was some kind of a monster.

I guess based on my past I shouldn't expect her to think otherwise. I was a crude heartless womanizer, who often juggled women. I was the worst kind of monster and mom would kick my ass if she knew some of the shit I did. I used women. Simple as that. But I was also a selfish fucker. I liked my women monogamous. The moment I found out that they were fucking someone else - I dropped them.

_But didn't she know she was different? _

Didn't she know that, although I'm sexually attracted to her - I saw more? I saw romance, commitment, a relationship; and based on that day in the den, when I imagined her in a wedding dress - I saw a future with her. I never saw these things with those other women.

She was special. A rare jewel.

I'm going back to campus in a few days and I can't stand the thought of leaving things like this. The possibility of never seeing her again, of her hating me; is equivalent to a knife twisting in my chest.

I can't leave things this way

Even if she doesn't want me, I still have to make her understand how special I thought she was; and that I would never use her like that.

I have to tell her.

I will tell her.

I rolled on my side and gazed out the window. The storm ended, leaving the sky unusually clear. The moon shone brightly and I could make out the tiny stars in a distance.

With my new resolve I closed my eyes and finally succumbed to sleep.

Review please


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their **

**Respective owners.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

**Chapter 13 - Ladies night **

**BPOV**

"For the last time Bells, the ringer's on loud" Charlie said exasperatedly.

"How do you know dad? …Huh? I mean, this is your first time with a cell phone. Let me show you how to do it" I tried to grab the phone out of his hand but he held it back out of my reach.

He huffed "You already did"

"What about checking your voicemails" I inquired

"I've got it Bells" he replied "Now, would you relax already"

I sighed and plopped down on the Cullen's sofa. I wish I could relax but unfortunately I couldn't. I've been a wreak all morning at work, which resulted in Alice sending me home early. I've been dreading this moment all day, but with Alice's help I'm coping much better then last time. However, this time my behavior is more overbearing then anxious. Since Alice sent me home I made Charlie take half of the day off and I've been basically bossing him around all day. I made him purchase a cell phone, get his cruiser inspected, and I made him raise his right hand a swear to god and grandma Marie that he and Harry would check into a motel for the night; I didn't want him driving while he was tired. He rolled his eyes then made a joke about how I'm worst then grandma Marie. I gaped at him in shock.

_He thinks I'm worst then his mom? _

"I'm trying dad, o.k.? I'm …really trying" I said, looking down at my fidgeting hands. My nerves starting to reappear.

He pulled me off the sofa and into his arms. "I'm going to be o.k., Bells. Remember? …we'll stop at a motel and get plenty of rest, and I'll call you every chance I get."

I pulled away and looked into his eyes. Even though he already swore and promised that he would do it, I needed to hear it again.

"Promise?" I murmured

He gazed at me solemnly, with nothing but honesty in his deep brown eyes

"I Promise Bells" I smiled and held him tighter, with my head resting on his chest. "Now go get my grand boys so I could say goodbye"

I blanched and my body went rigid, in his arms at those words. My heart palpitated and a sudden sense of fear overwhelmed me. _No, not goodbye. Please don't let this be goodbye_. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath and released it slowly; desperately trying to calm my body down.

Charlie, sensing my anxiety rubbed my back, soothingly " No, not goodbye Bells. See you later" he corrected.

My heart rate slowly decreased and I felt my body become calmer as Charlie murmured soothing and reassuring words in my ear. When I was relatively calm, I opened my eyes and sighed in relief_. Shit that was a close one_. I peered up at Charlie and he was smiling proudly at me. I smiled back, pretty damn proud at myself too.

_I can do this_

"Are you sure you're going to be alright kiddo?" he asked

"Yes she is" Alice said as she suddenly entered the room - Seth and Collin in tow.

"Bella will be way too busy to worry about a thing Charlie" she stated. I approached the boys and ruffled their hair, playfully. They groaned in unison and batted my hand away.

"But not too busy to call and check up on you dad" I added.

"I know, I know" he replied "Now come here boys. Give your grandpa a hug," they enthusiastically ran into Charlie's arms and he lift both of them up with a grunt. Alice pulled me to the side, letting them have their moment.

"So how you holding up" Alice asked with her arm slung over my shoulder.

I sighed "Like I told Charlie, I'm trying"

She pulled me into a hug "You'll see Bella. Every things going to be fine."

I smiled softly and nodded.

_Yes, everything going to be fine._

Suddenly she pulled back and playfully smacked me on my shoulder.

"And don't think I forgot about Alec calling you missy. You still need spill the deets" she said with a impish smile, while pointing her finger.

Oh shit, I forgot about that. The boringness fifteen minutes of my life.

"Deets?"

She rolled her eyes and huffed "Details, Bella. I need the details"

O.k. details, I could give her the details of the conversation I had with a dull, narcissistic, dick-wad of a man. I mean this guy was a pretentious fuck. He kept going on and on about his car, his money, his job, his apartment and even his skin. _What the hell? _Apparently he uses this sixty dollar cleanser, that does wonders on his skin, or some shit. The only thing he said pertaining to me was 'so…Rosalie said you're a looker, is it true' Of course, I responding by telling him that he'll just have to wait and see. But I mean, really? Why the hell would they think I'd be interested in this guy? What were they thinking?

Sighed " Well…"

Suddenly a loud chirping sound filled the room. I knew that sound. I glanced at Charlie as he put the boys down, dug in his pocket and flipped open his phone.

"Chief Swan" he said. I rolled my eyes at his formal greeting. "…yep…o.k.…I'm on my way, Harry" he ended the call and gazed at me and Alice.

"I'm sorry to interrupt you ladies, but I really have to get going. I got to pick up Harry" Charlie said. I walked over to him and hugged him again.

"Please dad. Please make sure you get a motel tonight" I implored, holding him as tight as I could.

"Will do, Bells. As soon as we drive out of Washington"

I pulled away and we walked him out the door. I stood on the porch; with Alice's arm slung over my shoulder and both of my boys holding on to each of my legs, giving me strength as I watched him trudged down the steps and hopped in the cruiser. He gave me a wink, waved at the boys and then…he pulled off.

I watched as his tires skidded across the gravel and the small puff of smoke from his exhaust pipes evaporated in the air. He made a right and then he was gone, off of the Cullen's property.

I closed my eyes and sent a silent prayer.

_Please god. Make sure Charlie's safe and bring him right back to me._

XXX

"Jesus Bella, hold still" Alice said as she swiped the cosmetic brush across my closed eye lids.

My eyes fluttered. Then Rose pushed the back of my head, indicating that she wanted my to tilt my head down.

"Um…it's kind of hard to do that when Rose is constantly pushing and tugging my hair" I said

" Sorry Bella, I'm almost done. I just have this small section in the back to do" Rosalie said

I sighed and further relaxed into the seat. I've been sitting her for hours, but I had to admit I was really comfortable. After Charlie left, I was feeling really anxious so Alice and Rose convinced me to allow them to give me a full make over. Although I'm not one for makeover's - in fact I never had one before, I agreed. For the simple fact that it would take my mind off worrying for a while. So they dragged me up to Alice's room and gave me a manicure and a pedicure; and now they were doing my hair and make up. It was relaxing. I just hope I don't end up looking like a clown. Or worst, a hooker.

_Speaking of hooker…_

"So, Rose. Where's the hook…I mean, where's your cousin?"

_Oh shit! _I hope she doesn't take offense to my almost slip. That's what I get for thinking about hookers.

Both girl chuckled and my eyebrows raised in confusion.

"Stop moving Bella" Alice chided

"Well…my hooker cousin is at my house, sleeping the day away. She got in pretty late last night. My guess is that she was out hooking" She replied. I gaped.

"Bella" Alice said in warning.

I relaxed my face "Sorry Alice"

"Don't look so surprised Bella. My cousin is a big time whore. She disgusting. To be honest with you, I don't even like her. I just put up with her because she's family and because of my late aunt Sasha. God rest her soul."

Tanya lost her mother? A part of me sympathized for the skank. No one deserves to go through the pain of losing their mother.

"How long" I murmured

"Three years ago. My family was devastated but no one took it as bad as Tanya. Her older sister Irina stayed in Alaska, eventually got married and started a family. But Tanya moved away, went to college and became the biggest slut the worlds ever seen. I mean, no bullshitting, the girl has fucked half of Seattle" she explained.

Oh shit, I was right.

"That's… terrible"

"Yeah it fucked up. My aunt Sasha was a saint and she would be rolling over in her grave if she knew what her daughter had become"

"Is she coming with us tonight?" I asked

"I hope the hell not. I mean, the fact that I left her ass home is like a big bold 'You're not invited' billboard in her face. But knowing her ditzy ass, she'll most likely follow us there"

"There" Alice said as she applied lip gloss on my lips "Done,"

"Are you sure?" I asked nervously, scared to open my eyes "I mean, I don't look like a clown do I?"

She gasped "Ouch Bella, That hurts"

"Sorry Alice. It's just that…I've never worn make up before so I really…I just don't want to look too…dramatic"

" Oh well, you're worrying for nothing then. Everything is really light and natural-looking. You don't even have lipstick on" I sighed in relief. Then I slowly opened my eyes.

I gasped at the sight of the young woman in the mirror, before me. She looked lovely and natural with a time-less beauty quality about her, .like the late actresses Rita Haywood and Jane Russell. Loose curls tumbled down and around her shoulders, bouncing with life and luster. As I gazed at her, I couldn't help but think…She looked beautiful.

_No, I looked beautiful_

I looked up and gazed at the two smiling faces of my friend's, as they gazed at me through the mirror.

"So…do you like it ?" Alice asked

I smiled brightly, nodding my head fervently causing my curls to bounce "I do…so much Alice. Thank you." she smiled "…and Rose, my hair looks so beautiful"

"Don't thank me just yet, I haven't finished. Now keep still" she retorted

I chuckled and ceased movement as she resumed curling my hair.

"So Alice, any word from Eddie the grouch?" Rose suddenly inquired

My heart beat accelerated and my ears immediately perked up, awaiting her response. Alice glanced at me and I averted my eyes, trying to appear nonchalant.

"Nope" she said popping the p "…but my mom said she spoke with him and he said he was fine."

"So…he's back in Seattle?" she asked

"I don't know, but he's o.k. and that's all that matters" she sighed "O.k. girls, I'm going to go get ready. See you in a bit"

She stepped out of the room and Rose continued to style my hair, thus ending that conversation.

_That's it? _I internally groaned in frustration at that smidgen of information. There was so much I wanted to know. I wanted to know what the hell happened between Edward and Carlisle. I wanted to know what Edward meant when he said he wasn't Carlisle's son and most importantly, What I really wanted to know was…

_If he was ever coming back? _

I've been thinking about him constantly, since he's been gone. I couldn't get him out of my mind. He's only been gone for like one day but that one day felt like one year. I missed him. I missed seeing him, I missed talking to him; and every time I think about the fact that I may never see him or talk to him again I feel so desolate. Like something was missing, and I will never feel right again until I got it back.

_Until he came back._

It was ridicules to have these feelings for someone I hardly knew. I've been with Jake for years and I've never had these intense feeling for him. Yes, I loved him. But this want, this pull, this… inexplicable desire I have with Edward was ten time more intense than anything I felt with Jake. It confused the hell out of me, but every time he touched me; whether it's was from his hands or lips. I felt more alive in that moment then I did in my entire life.

And I yearned to feel that again.

_I'd say, 'Operation: forget about Edward' is a definite failure_

"Did you hear me Bella? I said I was done" Rose said, staring at me intently.

_Oh shit _

I blinked and gazed into her deep blue eyes, through the mirror.

"Oh, thanks Rose. I'm sorry, I just sort of…spaced out" I replied, standing up and stretching.

" He'll be back, you know . So don't worry"

"Oh, I know. He's getting a motel tonight. As a matter of fact I need to call him" I pulled out my cell phone getting ready to dial Charlie's number.

"Oh I wasn't talking about your dad" she smirked and quickly walked out the room, without looking back.

I stood there, staring wide eyed at the door she just walked through, mouth agape.

_Oh, shit, She knew _

XXX

I spent the next hour holed up in the guest room, which I'm going to be occupying for the weekend. I called Charlie and he said they was still on the road and that he would called me as soon as they get a motel. But, the thing that really had me feeling uneasy at the moment was the fact that Rose knew. Even though she didn't come right out an admit it. I was positive she knew about Edward and I. And what I wanted to find out was, what exactly she knew?

Which is probably, not much, but it still worried me that she knew anything. I mean, what if she tells someone, what if she…

_Oh god! _I suddenly panicked. What if she told Alice something?.

_Shit, this is not good._

Suddenly there was a knock on the door, and Alice entered. She had a head full of rollers, holding a garment bag across her arms. Her expression was unreadable so I stood up and approached her warily. I gazed at her intently, trying to gauge her expression. When she smiled, I sighed in relief.

_She didn't tell her_

She carefully placed the garment bag on the bed and unzipped the zipper. A strapless - midnight blue mesh dress, laid in the bag. It was thigh length with a black belt around the waist. It was a lovely dress but way too sexy for someone like me.

" Nice dress" I stated. She smiled and started bouncing, elatedly.

"I knew you'd love it"

My eyes widened as realization suddenly dawned on me

"I'm not wearing that" I stated, pointing to the beautiful yet offensive garment.

"But, you said you liked it"

I shook my head "No I didn't. I said it was a nice dress, which it is, but its not for me"

She pouted with her lip jutted out "C'mon Bella, please…just this once"

I sighed "Alice…I'll look ridiculous. That dress it just…ugh…I can't wear it"

What I really wanted to say was, that the dress was not for someone plain, boring and completely unsexy - like me. I pictured her, Rosalie or even that bitch Tanya wearing a dress like that.

She gasped and narrowed her eyes " You will not look ridiculous, Bella Swan. You will look so hot, jaws are going to drop. So c'mon, hold that head high and enjoy yourself. You only have one life to live."

And that's all the encouragement I needed. I smiled and she bounced forward and pulled me into a _hug. _I chuckled and patted her back.

"We are going to have so much fun, Bella. Everything is going to be great." she pulled back, with a great big smile on her face "So get dress, I'm going to step out and finish getting ready" she squealed and practically leaped out of the room.

I glanced at the dress again. It really was a pretty dress, even though I knew Alice or Rosalie would undoubtedly look way better in it. I sighed. Then my gaze shifted to a pair of black stilettos on the floor. My eyes widened at the sight of the death traps and I groaned loudly. Not only will I look ridiculous, I'll be a danger to everyone within five feet of me. They might as well wrap me up in yellow caution tape now, because with those shoes on I'm a danger to society.

I slapped my forehead with the heel of my palm.

_Oh fuck, this is going to be a long night_

XXX

Club Twilight was unlike anything I've ever experienced before. Multi-colored strobe lights rotated around the vast area, illuminating the dimly lit club in green, red and yellow. The two level club was jammed packed with young adults mingling and dancing to music so loud you could literally feel it thumping in your body. Everyone was so carefree and happy, and I wanted to experience that for once too.

"This is great" I shouted, excitedly.

"Hell yeah" Rosalie shouted "Now let's go to the bar. I'm fucking parched"

Alice and Rosalie started dancing as we maneuvered our way through the club. A particularly sexy song came on and all eyes were on them. Alice was wearing a silver sequin - thin strapped dress and Rose was wearing a red pleated halter dress. They looked really great and by the sound of the whistles and catcalls, a group of guys were making - I'd say they thought so too. I suddenly began to feel self conscious. They looked like super models while I looked like a plain Jane deciding to play dress up. I not saying that I didn't look great, it's just that the confidence and poise that they possess was something that I would never have; whether I'm dressed up or not.

When we reached the bar, I sighed in relief. My feet were killing me and I've grown fatigue from all the stumbling I was doing. Alice perched on the bar stool, while Rosalie leaned against the bar and scanned the crowd. The guys - Alec and Demetri were suppose to meet us here, much to Rosalie's displeasure. She preferred to have the guys pick us up at the Cullen's place but after I told her that I wasn't too comfortable with that, she agreed with Alice that the guys should meet us here.

"Oh fuck, it's hot in here!" Alice exclaimed as she fanned herself with her hands.

"Ugh, where the fuck are they. They were suppose to be here already" Rosalie said as she continued to scan the crowd " I swear to god, if I have to buy my own drinks tonight - there's going to be hell to pay"

I began scanning the crowd along with Rosalie - looking for a pair of guys who might possibly be Alec and Demetri. After about five minutes, I felt kind of stupid looking for two guy that I've never seen before. It seems Rosalie and Alice failed to describe their appearance to me.

Just as I was about to throw in the towel, my eyes zeroed in on a pair of guys approaching the bar. One was tall and built with dark hair and a goatee; the other was slim, short with blond hair and he looked sort of boyish and young. I watched as the tall bulky guy crept behind Rosalie and covered her eyes wit his hands as the other guy looked on in amusement.

"If you don't get your sweaty fucking hands off me, I'm going to back kick you in the fucking nads" he immediately removed his hands and the small blond guy chuckled.

"Aww…c'mon Rosalie. I was just playing around" he said in a cute Italian accent.

She turned around and shoved his shoulders, pointing at him.

"Do not fuck with me, Demetri. That was strike one. If there's a strike two, you'll be going home alone tonight"

He held both hands up, defensively "O.k., o.k. Mi scuso Rosalie." he gently grasped her chin with his thumb and forefinger "Mi perdoni?"

She rolled her eyes, not at all impressed by his language or his charm.

"Yeah, whatever" Rosalie replied. "Now order me and my girls some drinks"

I half smiled and chuckled. _Rosalie was a fierce bitch _

She introduced me to the guys, who I had to admit were pretty cool. We fell into a casual conversation, talking about random stuff while we waited for our drinks - which was also pretty cool. The only thing that bothered me was the way that Alec was unabashedly gawking at me. I felt like I was naked under his gaze and It was making me uncomfortable - which was really fucking uncool. Suddenly the bartender approached us and gave us each a small glass and filled it with some amber colored liquor. He then gave us each a wedge of lime and placed a small salt shaker in front of us. Alice clapped, Rosalie murmured 'it's about damn time' and I arched an eyebrow in confusion, not understanding the significance between liquor, a sour piece of fruit and a condiment.

"Yay, Tequila shots!" Alice bellowed.

_Tequila shots? _Oh shit I heard about those. The stories I heard weren't pleasant either; they all started with 'So I was at this bar doing shots…' and they all ended with a bar fight, a night in the precinct, or a battered girlfriend. Of course, most of the stories I heard were from Jake's friends; and the rest were from various customers at Chelsea's diner. Suddenly my nerves made an appearance, but then a little voice inside said 'C'mon Bella live a little' So I push aside my nerves and bucked up.

_I can do this_

"I thought I'd start the night out with some shots." Demetri said "are you ready?"

My eyes shifted around, nervously. _What the hell am I suppose to do? _

Alice leaned over and whispered in my ear " Don't worry Bella. Just do what I do"

I nodded and watch her as she moistened the back of her hand by licking between her index finger and thumb. Then she sprinkled a little salt on the wet area. I followed suit and passed the salt shaker to Rose and she passed it to the guys. When everyone's hand was wet and salted we picked up our glasses. Alec suddenly cleared his throat, drawing our attention to him. He raised his glass and we followed suit

"I'd like to make a toast to old friends" then his gaze shifted to me, and what I saw in them caused me to gulp nervously "and a new friend, who I'm really…looking forward to getting to know better" he smirked mischievously and my stomach rolled.

_Alright this guy is creeping me out. _

Everyone nodded in agreement. Then they licked their salt covered hand, quickly gulped the amber liquor and immediately bit into the lime wedge. When they finished they put their glasses and wedges down, and looked at me expectantly. I took a deep breath.

_Well here goes nothing _

I licked the salt off my hand and closed my eyes as I gulped the amber liquor. I almost gagged at the bitter taste and the burning sensation that followed, it lit my throat on fire. But still, I persevered. I bit into the lime, sucking the juice out of it then I spit the lime across the bar. When I opened my eyes Alice, Rose and the guys were staring at me mouth agape. I smiled triumphantly. Then they started clapping and whistling.

"Way to go, Bella!" Alice bellowed, clapping. My smile grew wider.

"I knew you had it in you Bella. You fucking rock!" Rosalie exclaimed. I chuckled

"Molto buona Bella!" Demetri shouted

Alec slipped between Rosalie and leaned into me "That was so sexy" he whispered in my ear. I gulped nervously, suddenly feeling a little light-headed.

"Um…thank you" I replied and he smiled, mischievously.

He moved back next to Demetri. I watch him warily. He caught my gaze and winked. I don't know, but it was something about this guy that had me on edge. His mischievous smiles, smirks and the way he's undressing me with his eyes was making me think he was a snake in the grass and he had very bad intentions.

"Woo-hoo, that was great" Rose bellowed "Hey bar-keep, give us ladies a round of Mojito's and…uh…whatever for the guys." she said to the bartender, leaning over the bar causing the hem of her dress to ride up a little. Demetri's eyes popped out of his head and random guys surrounding the bar openly gawked at her ass.

_Disgusting pigs_

" Jack and Coke, for the guys" Alec stated. Demetri nodded his head in agreement

The bartender quickly made our drinks and set them down in front of us. With my new confidence, I wasted no time as I gulped half of my Mojito down - which tasted a hell of a lot better then that liquid fire I ingested a few minutes ago. That light-headed feeling slowly spread throughout my body, making me feel warm and really fucking pleasant. I downed the rest of my Mojito and gesture for the bartender to make me another one.

Alice chuckled "Are you having fun Bella?"

"Hell yeah" I exclaimed as the bartender slid my Mojito toward me.

"Well good because that will be your last drink for the night missy" she said mockingly, pointing to me.

"Yes mom" I replied. Then I thought about what I just said.

_Mom _

A sudden wave of sadness wafted over me as I thought about my mom. Immediately pushed it aside. Tonight wasn't about sadness and mourning. Tonight was about me, enjoying myself. And even though she was no longer here, I know my mom would be happy that I decided to go out and enjoy myself.

"You o.k. Bella?" Alice suddenly asked, sipping her drink.

"Abso-fucking-lutely" I exclaimed. She laughed. Then I downed my drink.

Two more mojito's later, the guys were ushering us to a lounge area at the back of the club. But I didn't want to sit. My body was full of life and energy that I didn't think I could possess. I felt carefree and happy; and I'd be damned if I ruined that feeling by sitting around. Because right now the only thing I wanted to do was…dance.

I stopped in my tracks and grabbed Alice's forearm "C'mon Al. Let's dance" I said excitedly.

Her eyes lit up in excitement "Hell yeah, Bella. Let's show this club, just how fucking hot we are!" she exclaimed.

"Now you bitches are speaking my language" Rose said eagerly as she grabbed our hands and quickly pulled us through the crowd, leaving the guys behind.

"Rosalie!" Demetri shouted from some where in the crowd.

We just laughed and walked a little faster - well in my case, stumbled.

As soon as we hit the dance floor we maneuvered deeper into the crowd, to ensure that the guys wouldn't find us. Once we were satisfied and knew that we'd never be found; We burst with laughter. We were at the core of the dance floor. Where the music was thumping so loud that we couldn't even hear each other shout. Suddenly a high tempo pop song played and the crowd went wild, clearly loving the Dee-jay's selection. Alice and Rosalie wasted no time as they swiveled their hips and started dancing with two guys behind them. Feeling good and free, I closed my eyes and immersed myself in the music. Getting lost in it. I moved my hips and body in a way I never did before - outside of my bedroom. I ran my hands over my body and dragged my fingers through the silky curls on my hair, feeling sexy and seductive - for the first time in my life.

_If only Edward were here_

If only he were here right now, to bear witness to this new Bella. This new sexy confident women who can chug drinks like a pro and move her body like a vixen. The Bella he knew was a dull, mousy little woman. This Bella is the one I wish he'd get acquainted with - on more then one level, if you know what I mean.

I suddenly felt two large hands grip my waist, then slowly wrap around my torso. My eyes snapped open. I stiffened and immediately stop dancing as I pulled away from the strange man. Without even a backward glance at the guy, I quickly made my way toward Alice and Rosalie. I gently cupped my hand over their ears and whispered that I needed a bathroom break. They both nodded in agreement, eagerly leaving their dance partners standing there befuddled.

The bathrooms on the first level were overcrowded, so we decided to go to the other - located on the second level. Even in their inebriated state, they gracefully walked up the stairs as I stumbled behind them - holding onto the rail for dear life. When we made it to the top I was out of breath. I looked ahead of me and immediately spotted the bathrooms. There was a long ass line in front of them, because one of them had a 'out of order' sign taped to it. I groaned in frustration at the amount of people waiting to go in one bathroom, that was apparently unisex.

_What kind of fucking establishment was this!_

I'll admit - when I first decided to take a bathroom break, it was only a lie to get away from that strange guy and his grabby hands. However, now…I really had to fucking pee.

"Hey Emmie!" Alice suddenly bellowed, bouncing around excitedly.

_Who? _

I gazed at her strangely, wondering if she had one too many. Then, some huge guy on the line, dressed in black - with a black baseball cap on, suddenly turned and stared at her wide-eyed. I watched the guy's shocked expression rapidly turn into a huge, dimpled grin as he walked over to us.

"Tinkerbelle!" he shouted as he scooped her up, lifting her feet off the ground.

I gazed at Rosalie and arched an eyebrow in confusion, but all her attention was on the huge guy. Who might I add was really fucking huge. I talking about body guard, bouncer and pro-wrestler huge. She had this strange glazed over look in her eyes as she stared at him. It was creepy. I thought briefly about snapping my fingers in her face to get her to snap the fuck out of it.

"Put me down, you big oaf" Alice said as she pounded on his chest with her tiny fist. He chuckled as he put her down and released her.

"Same ol' Tink" he said "Holy shit it's hot in here" he pulled off his cap, revealing a head full of cropped curly hair. I peered at his face as he fanned it with his hat. My eyes widened in recognition.

_He's her other brother, Emmett_

Alice placed her hand on her hip "Emmett, what the hell are you doing here?"

"What do you mean, sis? I'm fucking partying" he bellowed

She rolled her eyes "No, you big jerk. I mean, what are you doing here…in Washington? I thought you were in Maui with some bimbo"

He scratched his head and shifted his eyes, nervously.

"Oh…um…I uh…decided to leave a little early" he stammered in reply

"What happened to the girl" she asked

"I left her ass there" he joked with a smirk, which caused Alice to chuckled.

"You really are a big fucking jerk" she smiled, slapping his shoulder "I feel sorry for you future wife"

Rosalie chose that moment to cleared her throat, drawing attention to herself. Emmett gazed at her and his eyes grew wide as dinner plates as he looked her over, causing Rosalie - the queen of confidence to duck her head and flush pink.

I openly gaped at her. _What the hell was that? _

"I think I must be dying right now" he said, gazing at her intensely. She looked up a him coyly, cheeks tinged pink. He slowly approached her and stood in front of her "Because right now…I'm looking at an angel"

Alice snorted, bumping me on the shoulder as I bit my lip to fend off the laughter that was trying to escape.

I mean, really? …Did he get that from a book titled 'Cheesiest pick-up lines ever' I mean c'mon, that was really lame. Even he had a look of embarrassment on his face.

Alice's brother or not, Rosalie wouldn't dare fall for that shit. She was a fierce bitch.

But she shocked the hell out of me because, not only did she smile - but she giggled. A really girly giggle at that and he beamed at her.

Who is this woman, and what has she done with the fierce bitch - also known as Rosalie

Alice leaned on me - tipsy as hell, and cupped her hand over my ear.

"Rosalie doesn't know, I know that she's secretly in loooooove with my brother" she giggled

_Ooooh…she's smitten with him. Well…that explains things._

"I was wondering why she's so…soft all of a sudden" I murmured

" That's nothing. When we were teenager she always use to get real quiet and timid whenever Emm was around. Then as soon as he left the bitch would return. That shit was hilarious. It was some Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde shit" We chuckled humorously, leaning on each other. Thoroughly fucking sloshed.

"Hey, what's so funny midget" Emmett asked, gazing at us amusingly which cause us to laugh again.

"Oh, fuck you…you… big fucking bear' Alice snorted and we burst out laughing.

Emmett smiled "That my name baby sis" then he gazed at Rosalie "…and trust me they don't call me big…bear for nothing" he said emphasizing the 'Big'. Rosalie flushed two shades of red and they gazed at each other lustfully, like they were two seconds from jumping each other.

Alice scowled at him "Eww…Emmett, that's fucking disgusting. Bella and I didn't need to hear that shit"

Emmett's head snapped in my direction. "Bella. You're Bella?" he asked incredulously

I nodded my head warily and he gazed at me inquisitively. _What the hell was this about?_

Then his eyes lit up and he grinned - that huge dimple grin.

"Al-fucking-right!" he bellowed "Tonight is about to get even more awesome"

My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Alice placed here hands on her hips and scowled at him.

"What the hell are you talking about Emm? And what the hell does Bella have to do with it?"

"You'll find out in due time" he replied as he grabbed my hand "You two say here" he said looking at them pointedly. He didn't wait for a response as he quickly towed me around a corner, pass a bar and through a crowd. We stopped when we reach a secluded section of the club. I gazed at him perplexed.

"What are you…"

"go" he said as he pointed in the direction he want me to go.

I looked in the direction he was pointing in and saw a lone figure - standing by a rail with his back facing me. He was peering down at the crowd in the lower level, completely oblivious to anything else. He turned his head to the side, giving me a glimpse of his profile and my heart accelerated at the sight of it. _Straight nose, angular jaw line, neatly trimmed side burn and beautiful unruly hair_. I gasped.

It was Edward

"Edward" I said a little to loudly, thanks to my inebriated state. His head snapped in my direction, and I was not prepared for what I saw.

He gazed at me with the most intense expression that I've ever seen. There were so many emotions running through his eyes that my breathing deepen, just from looking at them. From my peripheral, I saw Emmett turn and walk away; leaving Edward and I alone. I should have felt nervous, but I didn't. This was Edward, the man of my dreams - literally.

He approached me slowly with ease, eyes boring into mine. However, I was a mess. My heart was pounding, my breathing was shallow, my face flushed and a certain part of my anatomy was throbbing relentlessly; Making it hard for me to think rationally. My desire for him was clouding every thing else in my mind and right now I didn't even care. Because all I wanted was him

He stood in front of me, silently taking in my appearance. He perused me from head to toe, spending extra time on my neck and my legs. My flush deepened, spreading from my face to my neck and then my chest. He watched the blood travel in awe, increasing my desire for him tenfold.

"Bella" he said in a husky, sexy voice "there aren't any adequate words to describe how amazing you look tonight"

I smiled, strangely not embarrassed by the complement. He smiled back in response. Then a series thoughts suddenly crossed my mind, making me nervous and anxious.

_What was he doing here? Did he come here with someone? Was he waiting for someone?_

"I couldn't stay away" he suddenly stated.

_What?_

"Bella, I don't have the straight to stay away from you anymore"

_Oh my god! _He's here because of me? My breath hitched at that revelation.

I lightly placed his hand in mine, twining our fingers. He glanced at our joined hands then gazed at me.

"Then don't"

**Review,Reviews, I need Reviews!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.**

**Falling Effortlessly**

Chapter 14- A new beginning

EPOV

When we entered the club I had only one goal in mind, and that was to find Bella. I needed to find her and tell her how I felt before it was too late and she fell for that douche she's with tonight. I didn't know him, but mom told me she overheard Alice and Rosalie talking about him yesterday. And according to them he was a real prince.

_Yeah, Yeah. I called my mom for info._

She would have told me regardless; because unlike Alice, mom's actually team Edward. She was ecstatic when I told her how I felt about Bella. She thought that Bella would be good for me. Something about how my eyes lit up whenever she was around. So she decided to help me, by giving me as much information as she could about the girl's whereabouts this evening. Which is how Emmett and I ended up at club Twilight.

As we maneuvered our way through the hordes of people; I was searching, left and right, for her distinctively long - mahogany hair. But the lighting was too dim. I couldn't differentiate black from brown. After a while I grew frustrated. So Emmett and I walked up to the second level; that way I'd be closer to the strobe lights and could search overhead. But as soon as we got to the second level, I spotted a bar and we made a beeline straight there. I was a nervous wreak and in desperate need of some liquid courage. Emmett, on the other hand, only wanted to get shit-faced and party. He said he was holed up in his condo for far too long and needed to let loose. But discreetly of course. He still didn't want the Paps on his ass. I wasn't planning on getting fucked-up like I did a couple of nights ago. I just needed something to calm my nerves a little. Because although I was very confident when it came to women, Bella was different. She made me feel unsure and nervous. She wasn't just an ordinary woman to me. She was special, the only woman I've ever met that made me want to change. I knew she was too good for me. Nevertheless, I wanted her or at least a chance with her.

_Selfish fucker much?_

When we arrived at the bar we both ordered rum and coke, and perched ourselves on the stools. I impatiently drummed my fingers on the bar table while I waited for my drink. Emmett gazed at me with an impish grin on his face.

"Don't worry 'bout it, little Bro. If this doesn't work, there's like so many replacements" he tilting his head toward a group of attractive women at the bar, that were eyeing us - while sipping their drinks. One of them winked at me. I turned my head, not wanting to give her the wrong impression.

If this was a week ago, when I didn't know Bella. I'd be agreeing with him wholeheartedly. But this wasn't a week ago and I met that amazing woman. And now, I would never be able to look at another woman the same.

I placed my elbows on the table and rubbed my eyes with my palms irritably.

"I'm not interested in replacements" I replied testily.

_Only her_

"Alight, alright. I was just making sure you're serious about this,"

"I am" I snapped, smacking my palms against the table. "I'm not fucking around" I started bouncing my leg up and down, on the stool. Emmett gazed at me warily

"Damn, bro. Calm the fuck down. You're making me fucking nervous" I sighed and immediately stopped bouncing my leg.

"I'm sorry Em. It's just…she's just…perfect. I just don't want to fuck this up, you know?" He nodded and stared blankly over my shoulders with a look of contemplation.

_What was that about?_

The bartender suddenly slid our drinks to us. I didn't waste time as I chugged down my drink - Emmett followed suit. When I finished my drink. My body was noticeable warmer. I felt at ease and slightly light-headed. I was buzzed. Emmett ordered two more drinks, but I declined. One drink was enough for me. I needed to be level headed and alert when I finally saw Bella again. I didn't want to end up looking like a drunken jackass.

He shrugged his shoulders and quickly chugged down both drinks. I gazed at him incredulously. _Did he even fucking breath?_

"What do you expect? I'm an Irishman, lad" He burped. I shook my head and chuckled.

"We're only three percent Irish, asshole" He took his cap off and waved it in his face, airing himself off. Then placed it back on his head.

"Well, it's still in our blood" he unzipped the top of his hoodie.

"Jesus, it's fucking hot in here"

_Well, no one told his ass to wear a black sweat suit to a fucking club._

"Em, what the fuck were you thinking, wearing that shit" He gazed down at his attire, flummoxed.

"What? I'm incognito" he stated.

"Incognito my ass. I'm surprised the bouncer let you in. You look like you're two minute from robbing this place" He gaped. I chuckled at his shocked expression.

That clearly wasn't the look he was going for tonight.

"Really?" I nodded my head. He sighed in disappointment and frowned.

"Aww, fuck. So much for being discreet"

After Emmett had another drink we left the bar. We found a booth in a more secluded area in the club, since Emmett didn't want to be noticed. I was glad because I needed to think about what I was going to say to Bella. I'm mean, what does one say to a girl they want to have a serious relationship with? Damned if I knew. I never wanted a serious relationship before and to my recollection, Emmett didn't either. He was just as bad as me. Probably worst. I don't know how true it is, but I once read in a magazine that Emmett was caught leaving a hotel with six women. Six. The most women I slept with in one night were three.

See, worst then me.

I was debating between 'Bella, I'm a selfish fuck up but you changed me, would you consider giving us a shot?' and 'Bella I can't get you out of my mind. Would you consider giving us a shot?' when a group of woman suddenly walked pass us. Emmett whistled catching their attention. Then he remembered he was supposed to be discreet so he lowered his hat and slouched down. I rolled my eyes at his idiocy_. Yeah_, _like no one See's you sitting there. _I spotted a familiar looking short-haired blond among them. She gazed at me wide-eyed in recognition.I knew her from somewhere, but I just couldn't pinpoint where_. _

"Edward!" she bellowed, in an unforgettable whinny voice. I groaned. _Now I remembered._

What are the fucking odds that I run into another one of my stalkers, the night I wanted to profess myself to Bella?

Oh this is just fucking great.

Makenna_. _The whinny- voiced chick I slept with a year ago on a spring break trip to Mexico, Jasper and I went on. This chick was fucking insane. I'm talking about; ropes, chains, biting and slapping. But she sucked a cock like you wouldn't believe. That's the only reason I put up with all her fuckery. But one day she took it too far and tried to put something in my ass. And that's when I had to drop her. Because ass play was a no, no in my book.

_I wasn't that fucking kinky_

"Makenna" I said with false enthusiasm "How's it…"

She suddenly hopped on my lap, squealing loudly - tightly wrapping her arms around my neck. I was immediately assaulted by the stench of vodka and cheap perfume. I winced when I felt her nails dig into the skin on my nape.

Shit! I forgot how fucking aggressive she was

Prying her arms from my neck, I stood up and politely pushed her a few inches away from me. Even though, what I actually wanted to do was fling her crazy ass across the room.

"Oh lover boy. I missed you so much," she purred. Emmett snickered behind me.

_Lover boy._ That was her little pet name for me. I hated when she called me that shit.

She wrapped her arms around my neck again, forcefully pulling my head down for a kiss. I was momentary surprised by her strength but then remembered she was some-what of a fitness guru and had incredible upper body strength for a woman of her size. When her lips were about an inch away from mine - I thwarted her attempt, by turning my head slightly to the side; causing her lips to brush against my cheek. She pouted in disappointment as I gently pried her arms from my neck.

"What's the matter lover boy? You don't miss me?" she pouted, trying to reach for me again. I took a step back, thwarting her attempts again.

_Can't she take a hint?_

"Makenna. We hooked up a year ago. For only three days" I replied incredulously

"I know. And they were the hottest three days ever" she took a step forward and slowly ran her hands up my chest. I grabbed her wrist, halting her movements. She smiled impishly "You know. I'm staying at a hotel not to far from this place. Let's continue this…little reunion, there. I'll make it worth your while" she said, licking her lips suggestively.

_Apparently she can't_

I released her wrist, her arms dropping to her sides.

"I'm not interested"

"Oh" she said wide-eyed, clearly shocked and disappointed. "Well…if you change your mind. Come find me, lover boy" she winked before walking away with her girls. I sat back down. Raked my fingers through my hair and let out an exasperated sigh.

_What was I thinking a year ago?_

Emmett whistled "What a hellcat"

I raked my fingers through my hair again "You have no idea. Imagine that shit in bed"

Emmett immediately sat up, interested "You're shitting me"

"Nope" I said popping the 'p'

"Damn, if you didn't already fuck her. I'd definitely fuck her. There's nothing hotter than banging an aggressive chick. It'll be like some BDSM shit" he stated crassly

I wanted to shout 'It was like some BDSM shit' but I didn't want to spur him on even more.

"Yeah. Just make sure you're into having shit jammed up your ass"

"What!" he bellowed, wide-eyed.

I chuckled at his reaction "It comes along with the territory."

I stood up and glanced at a railing up ahead, that overlooked the lower level of the club. I was suddenly really anxious to see Bella

"Look, I'm going to go head over there for a minute" I said nodding toward the railing. Three guys were now casually leaning against it. Emmett stood up and glanced behind him.

"Alright bro. I'm going to the bathroom. I gotta piss like a racehorse"

I shook my head at the phrase and made my way toward the railing. The closer I got to it, the louder the music got. The dance floor and the Dee-jay were located directly below the railing. I stood next to the three guys, who were now enthusiastically pointing to something below.

"Those chicks are so hot. Especially the little one and the blond" a tall lanky guy gushed.

"No, no the one in the blue is. I'd fuck her seven ways from Sunday" a short scraggly haired guy added

I peered down at the dance floor, inquisitively. My eyes widened when I spot Rosalie and Alice at the center, dancing with two guys. I knew my sister liked to party, but I've never seen her in action. My teeth clenched when I saw the guy's hands move on her ass_. I'm going kill that asshole_. When she grabbed his hand and brought them back to her hips. I sighed in relief, glad that I didn't have to commit a murder in such a public place. My eyes shifted to the left and my breath hitched when I spotted her.

_Bella_

She was dancing alone - which I was fucking happy about, and I never seen anything more sexy in my life. I was entranced by the way that blue strapless dress hugged her body, exposing her long beautiful neck and shoulders. The way her hair tumbled around her as she ran her hands through it, in the most enticing way. And the way her hips swiveled and moved, slowly and sexy. It was all so very erotic and sensual. _Like she's dancing… just for me_

My cock hardened at that thought. _Oh god I wish that were true_. Then my eyes narrowed when I saw some dark-haired asshole with a shit load of tattoo's come behind her and wrapped his arms around her. Who the fuck was he? _Was that her date? _My fist clenched with fury and jealously.

_She's mine._

"Way the go Ryan!" short scraggly guy bellowed.

"He totally snagged that chick in the blue" tall lanky guy added

My head snapped in their direction. _Are they talking about Bella? _

"If I was him, I'd totally wrap my hand around all that hair and pound my dick against that sweet ass" the last guy piped up, who was just as weird looking as the other two.

They were definitely talking about her. And that guy that was on her wasn't her date. He was just some asshole trying to get his fucking dick hard.

Now, I'm fucking furious

The threesome chuckled and I desperately tried to fight off the urge to pummel them, then jump off this fucking rail and kill that motherfucker that has his hands on my Bella.

"Aww fuck, where did they go?" tall lanky guy said. My head snapped back to the dance floor and Rosalie, Alice and Bella, were indeed gone. I was relieved when I saw the assholes that were dancing with them still there. Looking some what befuddled.

I immediately scanned the crowd below in search of the girls. I looked left and right but I couldn't find them. _Where the fuck did they go? _There were too many people down there to make out a single person, let alone three. _Fuck! _I missed my chance with her because I was so busy eavesdropping on these three fuckers. I turned and glared at them in distaste. I can't believe I use to be like them. Talking about women and using them as if they were objects. Toys. I raked my fingers through my hair in frustration, pissed at myself for not running down there five minutes ago. Now they probably fucking left. And I'm standing here looking like a fucking jackass.

I turned back around and peered at the crowd below.

What the fuck do I do now?

Well I have two options. I could either go back to the house or ask mom to give me Bella's number.

They both were good ideas but the problem was I'm not going back to Carlisle's fucking house. _Fuck him. _And mom would never give me Bella's number without her permission first. And I'm not sure how Bella feels about me at this moment. For all I know, she'd probably tell mom to tell me to fuck off. I sighed and raked my fingers through my hair.

Maybe I should just forget about this whole fucking plan and take my ass back to Emmett's place. I'm leaving in two days anyway. Maybe I should just forget about her and move on with my life.

No.

My heart clenched at that idea. Even if I do say fuck it and leave, I would never be able to forget about her. That's an impossibility. She would be forever on my mind, my thoughts, and my dreams. I'd always think of her as the one that got away. The one that I was to chicken shit to run down the stairs of a dark nightclub and profess my absolute love and adoration to.

_Whoa, Whoa, Whoa._

_Love?_

_I get adoration. But love?_

_Now I'm in love with her? _

I tried to ignore the way my heart soared just thinking about that word and Bella used in the same context.

_No, no I'm just being emotional right now. I can't be in love with her, it's to soon…_

_right?_

"Edward!" a soft unforgettable, beautiful voice bellowed.

Goose bumps rose on my skin. My head snapped in the direction of the voice. And there she was, standing there looking like an angel, a goddess or some kind of ethereal being. She looks far too beautiful to be human.

As I stood there and gazed at this incredibly beautiful woman; I knew in that moment that any woman before her will cease to exist. My life would be miserable and incomplete without her in it. Alice, Carlisle and the whole fucking town of Forks, couldn't keep me away from her again.

I knew that because…

_I was in love with her._

I approached her - with what I hope looked like ease. But truthfully, my mind was on a whirlwind. Now that I knew for a fact that I was in love with her, I had to fight with the instinct to wrap her in my arms, kiss her senseless and confess all that I'm feeling. It was too soon for that. But the way she was looking at me, wasn't helping me one bit. She was looking at me the same exact way; she looked at me that day in the basement. Like she wanted me. And God knows I wanted her.

I stood in front of her and slowly perused her heavenly appearance. From her slender toned legs to her flushed, elegant neck - where my eyes lingered a bit longer. I remember how her skin smelled and tasted. How it felt against my lips. How appealing I found the bluish veins that appeared underneath her translucent skin.

But remembering was not enough for me anymore. I was in love with her. I wanted to experience it again. I needed to.

Her flush deepened under my scrutiny. I watched as her blood travel from her face all the way down to her chest. My cock stiffened. The urge to trace that path with my tongue was so fucking strong. I needed to say something. If I continue to stand here and gawk at her like this I just might do something

"Bella" I said in a voice full of want "There aren't any adequate words to describe how amazing you look tonight"

It was true. Beautiful, gorgeous, breath-taking were not sufficient to describe her tonight.

Her eyes lit up and she smiled coyly. I smiled back loving her response. Then suddenly her brows furrowed and the expression on her face worried me immensely.

_Oh, no what's wrong? Am I being too forward?_

She chewed her bottom lip, deep in thought for a minute. Then she murmured, so low I hardly heard it. 'What was he doing here?'

_I'm here because I love you _

No, no! I can't tell her that. She'll think I was insane. It was too soon for that. So I decided to tell her the next best thing.

"I couldn't stay away"

She stood silent, face flushed carnation pink. I watched as her chest rose and fell rapidly, which unnerved me a bit. But it was too late to turn back now. This is the moment I've been waiting for. It's time to lay it all on the line.

"Bella, I don't have the strength to say away from you anymore"

There I said it. It wasn't I love you. But it pretty much sums-up how I felt about her overall.

She inhaled sharply, but stayed silent. My heart pounded in my chest as I waited for her to respond. _Oh, god! I am being to forward._

_Please, say something._

Suddenly, I felt her soft warm hands lightly grabbed mine - twining our fingers. The electric current hummed straight to my heart, causing it to beat twice as fast. I glanced at our joined hands, in awe of how great they looked clasped together. Big and small, rough and delicate. Then I gazed into her warm chocolate eyes, earnestly.

_Please, say something_

"Then don't" she murmured. I blinked twice.

_Does that mean…_

"Bella?"

I had to understand. What does that mean? I needed to hear it.

"I tired of being away from you, Edward"

She wants me too!

I had to fight off the urge to stand on top of the railing and shout at the top of my 'Hey everybody, she wants me too!'

I squeezed our joined hands and smiled my first real smile in days. She smiled back and I never seen anything more beautiful in my life. As corny as it sounded I can honestly say my heart fluttered at the sight of it. It fucking fluttered.

"You don't know how happy I am to hear you say that" I gazed into her eyes earnestly as I slowly lifted the hand I was holding and placed a searing kiss on the back of it.

I watched her eyes flicker from my eyes to my lips. She had that look again. The one she had that day in the basement. The one that immediately engorged my cock. My heart sped up and I swallowed thickly. She has no idea how much affects me

"Me too" she replied

I placed our hands down, twining our fingers again. Her eyes didn't waver from my lips.

She involuntarily licked her lips. I stared at the movement transfixed. Remembering how warm and soft her lips felt on mine. How sweet her tongue tasted. My cock twitched at the memory.

_I needed to feel her_

I squeezed her hand again and slowly pulled her body to mine, giving her the option of pulling away if this was something she didn't want. My gaze flickered from her eyes to her mouth. I didn't know which one I found more appealing at the moment. When her body was flush against mine her eyes prevailed.

"Bella"

"Edward"

On their own accord, my hands slowly glided up the soft skin of her arms, over her shoulders, up her neck to her cheeks. She shivered from my touch. I smiled, loving that I affected her too.

"Bella, I really want to kiss you right now. Would that be o.k.?"

_Please say yes, please say yes_

"What about Tanya?" she whispered. Eyes filled with doubt and uncertainty.

_What! Who gives a shit about that whore_

"I don't want to kiss her" I stated rubbing circles on her cheeks, reassuringly - with my thumbs.

"Why not?"

_Because I love you_

"Because I want to kiss you. Only you"

She closed her eyes and inhaled sharply, absorbing what I just said.

_Yes Bella, you're the only girl I want_

"Please" she murmured

"Please what?" I inquired

Her eyes opened. The look in it was enough to send my heart in a frenzy.

"Please kiss me Edward"

She didn't have to ask me twice. I leaned in and softly pressed my lips against hers. My eyes closed as I felt her mouth move with mine. The kiss was languid and slow. Savorous; as we reacquainted our lips with one and other. It felt so good and natural to kiss her. Like our lips were made to be molded together. I would never get enough. I wanted to feel her lips on mine everyday for the rest of my life, as crazy as that sounded.

I pulled back, breathing harshly and leaned my forehead against hers with my eyes still closed

"I'll never tire of that" I murmured mostly to myself

"What" she breathed.

I opened my eyes and gazed at her. Her face was flushed pink. Her lips were red and parted. And her chest rose and fell repetitively. _So fucking beautiful _

"Kissing you" I smiled, rubbing circles on her cheeks with my thumbs again. She smiled.

I leaned for another kiss but she grasped my hands that were on her cheeks, halting my attempt.

I gazed at her disconcertingly. Her eyes were once again filled with doubt and uncertainty.

_I hated that look_

"What are we going to do, Edward?" She asked "Alice…"

My eyes widened at the mention of that devious little pixie

"Fuck Alice!" I spat.

She jumped at my outburst, released my hands and took a step back. Staring at me incredulously. I raked my fingers through my hair.

"Shit, I'm sorry Bella. But I don't want to think about Alice right now"

"But she's important to me. The decision we make will affect our friendship." she lowered her head "It will affect every thing"

"Bella…"

"Listen Edward. I know that I'm fucked up and damage and it's selfish of me to want you. But I do… I want you. I felt dreadful without you. I'm just worried. Alice and your mom have been so good to me and my boys. I don't want to lose them" she gazed into my eyes and I saw fear there.

_She really was afraid she'd lose them._

"You're not going to lose them"

"Yes I am. Once they find out their over achieving brother and son is involved with the pathetic unwed mother of two, they pity so much"

_Pathetic? Pity?_

"How can you say that Bella?" a familiar light voice suddenly asked. Bella gasped.

_Alice_

She approached us, with a hurtful expression on her face. Bella has yet to turn around and face her. Her eyes were squeezed close as if she was in pain.

_She's really afraid. _I cupped her face and gazed at her anxiously.

"Bella?"

She shook her head "Please…don't"

Her voice hitched and tears began to slowly fall from her eyes.

Alice was immediately at her side. She pulled her into a hug and Bella sobbed on her shoulder. I suddenly felt like I was intruding on a private moment.

"I'm so sorry Alice. Please don't hate me" Bella sobbed. Alice rubbed her back soothingly.

I frustratingly raked my fingers through my hair. It killed me to stand back and watch someone else comfort her, even if it is my sister.

"I can never hate you Bella. You're like a sister to me"

"But…Me…and Edward" Bella sobbed

"Bella I was more worried than angry. I don't want you to get hurt" Alice pulled back and gazed at Bella "You're important to me too, you know" Bella gave her a sad smile and murmured 'Thank you' before hugging her again.

"I would never hurt her" I suddenly piped up.

_I loved her_

Alice turned and glared at me "I will get to you later" she said in a mock friendly voice.

I glared back at her_. You're on pixie _

Alice turned back to Bella, grabbing her hand "C'mon Bella. Let get you cleaned up in the ladies room" She nodded her head as Alice pulled her away from me.

I couldn't help but feel desolate as I watched her walk away from me. It was irrational I know. She's only going to the bathroom and would most likely be back. But, something about watching her walk away from me pained me deeply. I didn't like the feeling. I wanted her close to me all the time.

When she was half way across the room I began to feel uneasy. What if she doesn't come back? Oh god what if Alice gave her an alternative. Their friendship or me?

She'll choose Alice.

As if she sensed my inner turmoil she stopped and looked back. Our gazes met.

"Will you be here when I get back?" she asked hopefully

_Oh yes Bella, I'll wait for you forever my love_

I smiled broadly "Definitely"

She smiled and they resumed walking. They turned a corner, nearly bumping into Emmett who surprisingly had his hand clasped in Rosalie's. My eyes widened at this new development.

What the hell?

Alice quickly whispered something in Rosalie's ear. She nodded her head and released Emmett's hand. The expression on his face was priceless. He literally looked like a sad fucking puppy or in his case a dying bear. Rosalie kissed him on the cheek reassuringly, whispering something in his ear. When she walked away, following the girls around the corner; Emmett gazed at their retreating figures for a minute then turned around and gazed at me with a wide smile.

"What a woman" he gushed as he approached me.

I shook my head and raked my fingers through her hair, consumed with thoughts of Bella. Well, really her self deprecating could she think she was pathetic and my family pitied her? They adored her and her sons. As a matter of fact they liked her better than me. I realized she didn't view her self as the beautiful caring woman my family and I grew to love. She thought she was fucked up, damage and pathetic. Even though those words were far from true, she believed them. I heard the certainty in her voice when she said them; I saw the resignation in her eyes. She thought she was unworthy of me.

_Preposterous _

We walked to the booth we occupied earlier and sat down. Emmett gazed at me intently.

"So? How did it go with Bella?"

I raked my fingers through my hair. "Fine, I guess"

"You guess? What the hell does that mean? Are you guys together or what?"

_Are we? Well I didn't exactly ask her to be my girl. _

"Well…I don't know. It's kind of complicated"

"Complicated? C'mon bro don't leave me hanging. I dedicated a whole fucking day to help you get this girl. I risked being seen by the paps, even Alice. Now what the hell is so complicated?"

I sighed "She thinks mom and Alice will hate her if we're together"

"Really?" his eyes widened incredulously. I nodded my head "Well tell her that's not true"

"I did"

"Then what?"

"Alice" I said simply

"Well fuck that!" he boomed "We are not leaving this club tonight until that girl is yours"

_Until she's mine. _I smiled.I liked the sound of that.

I nodded my head in appreciation and he smiled; thus ending all talk of Bella and I. Which I was pleased about. I didn't want to further discuss Bella's insecurities with Emmett anyway; it was a private matter that only she and I needed to discuss. And we would. When that conversation ended he chose to bring up a disturbing topic. Rosalie. The new love of his life and queen of his castle, but to me she'll always be a stone cold bitch. He honestly shocked the hell out of me with this one. Never, in my life had I heard Emmett gush about a girl like this. It was sickening. But I had to admit I could relate. He sounded like me when I talked about Bella. He told me he had feelings for her since she was a teenager, but never acted on it because she was too young and also Alice's friend. Now that I think of it, I do remember him always lingering around the girls whenever he came home on weekends - when he was in college. When I told him this, he ducked his head and sheepishly admitted that she was the reason he came home in the first place. I gazed at him incredulously. He had a twinkle in his eyes and a smile on his face when he spoke of her.

_Who is this guy and what the hell did he do with Big Bear._

When the girls finally approached us. I stood up and nervously raked my fingers though my hair. My heart was pounding so fast I thought I was on the verge of a coronary. This moment will make me or break me. What will she choose? I know that our connection is undeniable and overwhelming but so are her insecurities.

_Will she throw caution to the wind and give us a shot? _

I tentatively gazed at her and what I saw shock the hell out of me. She was smiling. I mean really fucking smiling. _Thank god. _I sighed in relief, my nerves once again put at ease. She caught my gaze and her eyes lit up. I smiled broadly in response.

_God I love her smile_

When she stood in front of me. It was as if the whole room faded away and it was just the two of us gazing into each others eyes. With matching shit eating grins on our faces. My eyes flickered to her lips once again. I really wanted to kiss her, but I wasn't sure if she wanted me to kiss her with our present company. She licked her lips, intensifying my need to feel her lips on mine.

"Oh, for fucks sakes! Would you two kiss already" Alice suddenly bellowed.

_What?_

I turned around and gaped at my nemesis, who just - in her own unique way, gave us her blessing. What the hell brought this on? Not that I'm complaining. But I am curious.

She crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes.

"If you hurt her. I'll kill you, ass-wipe" she stated matter-of-factly

"I'll be begging you to" I responded earnestly

"Hey, what about me? Don't I get to kill Eddie too" Emmett piped up, with his arm around Rosalie's waist. She grinned up at him, completely oblivious.

I scowled at him "No, I'll kill your ass if you call me Eddie again"

He flexed his arms and pounded his fist in his hand.

"Bring it on little bro. I'll demolish your candy ass"

_Big bear returns_

Bella chuckled. I turned to her. Her cheeks were pink and she had this light in her eyes, I never seen before. She looked happy.

"Oh, you think he's funny huh?" I said, mockingly glaring at her

She smiled. "Yup"

I wrapped my arms around her waist. "And how will you feel if he demolishes me?"

I pulled her body flush against mine. She tilted her head up and gazed in my eyes.

"I'll be devastated"

"Good"

I leaned in and captured her lips with mine. She wrapped her arms around my neck and smiled against my lips.

"Woo-hoo! Lil' bro got his girl!"

I pecked her lips twice and leaned my forehead against hers.

"Yup, I got my girl"

XXX

AN: I just want to point out that Emmett is 26 years old and this story will be picking up after this chap. And those of you, who alerted this story, please Review. It brightens up my day.


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